So what’s up with Kale… and why does everyone want me to eat it?

 

(Disclaimer – I am not a kale fan, and the popular leafy green will be heavily disparaged in this post.)

 

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I’m a good girl. I eat my veggies, green and otherwise.

Yes, Popeye I even eat my spinach.

Hell, I live in Maine… I have been served dandelion green and Nasturtium bloom salad and smiled. (Although I do draw the line at Fiddleheads, those slimy aborted fern fronds people in New England go beserk for every spring. If I’m going to ingest something I pick alongside the road it had better be blackberries. Preferably in brandy form. But I digress.)

Throw a little kale in my salad, fine. I won’t revolt. (Hell, if you smother it in enough blue cheese dressing, I will eat a brick)

But please…. stop trying to incorporate it into everything else.

My girlfriend served a big bowl of kale chips with French Onion Dip at a party.  (Not cool…. bring back my Ruffled Lays.)

Another friend invited us over for an Italian dinner. Sweet! Until I saw the lasagna as well as the ravioli was stuffed with kale.  (That’s just wrong.)

 

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I do not want your kale frittata.

Your kale burgers, your kale pie….

 

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And most of all your kale pizza!

That’s just sacrilege.

 

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The kale craze has gone too far.

Okay, it’s nutritious… but enough’s enough.

From now on I’ll be flying my new banner high and proud.

 

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Long live Rocky Road!!

All hail Mint Chocolate Chip!

 

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For the love of all that’s holy….

Noooooooooo!!!!

 

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33 thoughts on “So what’s up with Kale… and why does everyone want me to eat it?”

  1. I’ve been a vegetarian for 20+ years. I LOVE eating veggies and greens. And Kale is . . . the worst green out there.

    Give me spinach, swiss chard, collards, beet greens, etc., and I’ll happily utilize them in any number of ways ~ in soups, casseroles, lo meins, as “spanakopita” topping for chips, etc.

    Give me Kale and I’ll follow that nifty Pro Tip you shared! :mrgreen:

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  2. Bacon on/with everything (yes including ice cream sundaes at Denny’s) avocado on/with everything, Kale on/with everything–I am surprised someone hasn’t come up with a bacon, avocado and kale sandwich, omelet, banana split, pizza—heck why not a Margarita–you would drink it!! LOL

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  3. I actually love Kale–but if my introvert ass comes to your shindig and there are Kale chips with the French Onion Dip, I will straight up burn that MF’er to the ground. Thanks, Susan. That Kale chip really helped to soak up the four vodka tonics I just slammed like Aunt Betty before she started her 30-day club.

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  4. I’m sorry, I like kale. I like kale salad, with parm and croutons and lemon. I put it in my peasant soup, and I totally LOVE kale chips. I don’t know why I must pay $7 for kale chips, and we can never agree on flavors, so really I spend $21 on kale chips. BUT! I Love Ice Cream and do not want kale in it. Nor would I serve kale to friends who came to a party where there should be treat food.

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      1. LOL! It maaaay be possible you’ve not been exposed to tasty kale chips. I could link you, but for $7 when you might not like them, well, you know… that’d be wrong.

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      2. No.
        And again? No!
        I have a girlfriend who is always trying to push new flavors at me saying, “Oh… but you’ll love this one.” And ya know what? I never do!

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  5. I’m posting new stuff on my other site though, laurabecknielsen.com. I’ll have to write a new kale story just to christen the new one. Nah- I’ll go with bubbly. I’m going to try to make egg benedict from scratch for the first time (OK I bought the english muffins) and I’ve got mimosa fixin’s. Birthday brunch! Spoiler alert: there will be no kale.

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