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So I walked in on my husband the other day, and this was what he was watching….
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I knew it was going to be good.
Or bad.
Or so bad, it’s good.
I wasn’t disappointed.
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A walking tree stump reincarnation?
I was in!
Having missed the first third of the movie I can’t give you the background story, but I knew something was going to go wrong when the visiting doctors dug up a tree with a face and a knife in it’s… chest?
.
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Back at the lab, the lady doctor/heroine whipped out her stethoscope to check its vitals.
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The diagnosis? None. They were stumped… (pun intended) and left the room to confer with colleagues.
Bad idea.
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Very bad.
The rampaging evil spirit tree, which we learned is named Tobanga, ran amok and captured a South Sea native girl.
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And hurled her in the quicksand.
She begged for her life…
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But Tobanga was merciless.
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Bye bye scantily clad native girl.
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Her death stirred up the villagers and they vowed to track the malevolent creature.
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But you know that didn’t go as planned.
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This fellow was tossed into a ravine and impaled….
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Which pissed off the guy in the stunning headband to no end.
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He gathered more natives to dig a pit… and used himself as bait to lure the creature.
Edge of your seat drama. Yessiree.
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Success! We shall stab the beast with our spears..
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Light him on fire and make charcoal briquettes!
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But alas, that didn’t turn out well either.
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Headband guy was doomed.
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And chucked off the side of a mountain.
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And as you know it had to..
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Tobanga then captured our heroine.
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Her fellow doctors armed themselves and were in hot pursuit, willing to lay down their lives for the fair haired damsel in distress.
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(Except for the guy on the right who knows that bitch Karen deserved it for digging up the cursed thing in the first place.)
Bam!
Our hero saved the day with an expertly placed shot to Tobanga’s … heart?
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And into the quicksand he went….
Bye bye Stumpy.
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The natives were so grateful they asked our hero if he would be their village witch doctor.
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And though flattered, he refused… and moved back to Burbank with Karen.
Yeah, you know he’s going to regret that.
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I loved that movie. It was so bad that I couldn’t turn it off… The stump looked like an angry muppet…
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It was bloody marvelous.. in a can anything really be this bad way.
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I love bad movies. Maybe one day I can hang out with your husband and watch one…
… but, I’d imagine I’d have a hammer in my hand pretty quickly…
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That would be swell. But yes, until the barn reaches full completion… which at the rate we’re going should be 2042… you’d more than likely be recruited.
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I’ll have to look for this one.
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It’s a classic. You won’t regret it. Or you will, which is even better!
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omg
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It’s that good. Yes.
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There’s a new channel on our cable system that shows nothing but turds like this. ‘Heaven, I’m in heaven…’
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Don’t tease a girl like that…. what’s the channel?
🤞
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It’s called ScreenPix, and it’s actually three channels…one for ‘Action,’ one for ‘Westerns’ and one for all the other crap out there.
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Damn. We have Direct TV, which is the only option out here in the boons. That’s not on their line up. Waaaaa!
😢
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Tobanga, the doctor and Karen huh? Doesn’t sound like a good combination that’s for sure. Especially with Karen because we all know what Karen’s are capable of don’t we? lmao
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We do. And that bitch is everywhere…
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Sure! No respect for moviegoers–all SPOILERS!!! And a movie with an all star cast! Shame on you!
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Sorry. But I figured the joy of sharing outweighed the chances of anyone ever stumbling across it.
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That sounds amazing!
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It was awful. So in other words… frickin’ fabulous!!!!
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OMG. Quicksand TERRIFIED me as a kid. (Thank you for a great blog post idea!).
This isn’t even a B movie. It’s more like a G or H movie…
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Quicksand needs to make a comeback in film. And life…. I can think of quite a few people I’d like to toss in.
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These B horror movies were way ahead of their time. Viewers in the stoned out 60’s would have appreciated their “creativity” more than the Cleavers did…
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Tobanga on acid? Whoa….!
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Tree Huggers BEWARE!
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This was the tree no one should hug.
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