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The shelf war.

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We started with these 3 foot long shelves under the bar.

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They’re floating shelves… and while they technically don’t float, they are an absolute pain in the ass to install. So when I told the husband I wanted two more on the adjacent bar wall, he was less than thrilled but agreed they were necessary. Of course then the stupid electrician put the new outlets too high up on the wall to install 3 foot shelves at the same height as the others. That’s when the war began.

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I was fine with moving the bottom shelf higher.

The husband was not. Which resulted in a major kerfluffle.

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We disagreed on placement…. and though I had won the 4 versus 3 custom liquor bottle shelves battle, this war ended differently.

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Busy with other things we put this chore on the back burner… or so I thought until the husband disappeared one afternoon and I found him under the bar. Removing my 3 foot shelves and all their contents.

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Unbeknownst to me, he had returned my 3 foot shelves to the store and come home with the 2 foot versions instead. I told him I didn’t want 2 foot shelves. That it would look off balance and not provide enough space.

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To which he paid no attention and proceeded to install the stubby 2 foot shelves. He was determined they fit right into the corner and ripped out the nice trim piece I had our contractor install. When I looked displeased, he assured me they would line up perfectly with the existing shelves and look great.

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I think you know how that went.

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They didn’t line up, despite the numerous hours he cursed like a drunken sailor tinkered with them.

No matter what he did, the new shelves rose slightly above the older ones and wouldn’t lay flat.

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His solution?

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A few pieces of too thick moldy old wood from under the baby barn…. to bring them together.

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Which makes me wonder what part of the invisible bracket floating shelf aesthetic he didn’t understand.

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I’m hoping once we get the double tap kegerator in there the unbalanced shelves won’t be quite so noticeable.

But either way, there’s still not enough room.

😒

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37 thoughts on “The shelf war.”

  9. As a member of the fraternity of terrible carpenters, I must back his play. My whole house is held together with little blocks of wood and the flex seal family of products. Like myself, I’m sure it was beautiful in his mind.

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  12. Important info about drunken sailors: Drunken sailors never swear, and here’s why. There’s drunk and there’s Navy drunk. If you’re Navy drunk, you’re too far gone to speak. I might have been that way once or twice but mostly I have helped my friends get back to the boat. You don’t have to do that too often before you figure out how much you really want to drink.

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      3. My wallpaper is a slide show. I see his face every day and I tell his story to anyone who will listen. The real death is when no one talks about you or remembers you anymore. I will stand between him and that for as long as I can.

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