Have you ever…

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Have you ever sat on an orthopedist’s table watching an ultra sound monitor as they stick a foot long red hot poker in your knee?

No? Well, I did yesterday morning… and oddly enough I don’t recommend it.

First it was a shot of lidocaine… which I can only describe as being injected with molten hot lava.

.

.

Yes, exactly like that.

Holy water? Pfft. Lidocaine’s got that beat hands down… and it was only the appetizer.

A minute later the big gun came out. Cortisone, to aid in pain relief and reduce inflammation from my deep root meniscus tear.

Pain relief? After a week of beached whale status on the couch I said bring it!

Holy mother of God. I’ve had cortisone shots before, but never in a deep rooted knee injury. And let me tell you, I never want to have one there again.

I realize that screaming isn’t the best thing to do in a doctors office as it tends to make the people in the waiting room uncomfortable, but damn. I couldn’t help it. That needle kept going in, and in, and in …

.

.

Lying bastards.

I yelped upon entry.  (Lidocaine, you suck and didn’t dull a thing.)

I squealed when it was halfway there.  (Numbing agent my ass.)

And when that foot long bastard finally got to where it needed to be? I think I was crying for my late mother.

And mind you, I’m the high pain tolerant girl who recovered from a full abdominal hysterectomy with no morphine or fentanyl because I’m narcotic resistant.

So did this torture session offer pain relief? My knee felt a little better later that afternoon.. but I woke up in the middle of the night with throbbing and swelling where I didn’t have it before. So now I’m dealing with the “temporary pain and inflammation at the injection site for 48 hours” that only a few lucky people experience.

Long story short?

It sucks to be me right now.

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36 thoughts on “Have you ever…”

  1. You described my experience with a cortisone shot EXACTLY. Hurt like hell going into my wrist, then woke up in the middle of the night in excruciating pain. I actually had to call in sick the next day because my job revolved around using a pencil and paper and I couldn’t work my cortisoned wrist. I’m sure you can imagine how easy showering and using the bathroom were…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’d like to say I’m glad I’m not the only one but I wouldn’t wish this on anyone. The wrist would be an equally bad place… of course I can’t stand on one leg to put my underwear on, so the knee isn’t really any better.
      🙄

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Oh man, so sorry. That sounds horrible.

    You’re hardly the first I’ve known describe such an issue with cortisone shots. So much so that when offered one as treatment for a foot issue years ago, I not only said “No!” I said, “Hell, no!” It seemed those who got some relief only had it temporarily, so the pain of the injection hardly seemed worth it.

    Maybe time to pursue alternative solutions? In the meantime, self-medicate in proven ways that work, even if only short-term 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I have had Lidocaine and cortisone (note, i mispelled Lidocaine and spell check suggested cocaine), and both were bad. Not as bad as you describe, because mine were in my shoulder, but bad. I’d never do it again. I hope you feel better in 24-48 hours.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. You see that shot in the picture you posted? Huh? See it? The cancer immunotherapy shot I get is BIGGER than that. No kidding. No sarcasm. It is bigger. They have to freeze a part of my upper butt so I do not feel it, mostly. I get that shot every 28 days for the rest of my life, so yeah, I kind of get it.

    Liked by 1 person

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