Chickens.
They’re marvelous creatures.
Much maligned….
And underappreciated.
But now..
I’ve discovered this.
And all is right with the world.
Monthly Archives: June 2019
Baby chucker update.
What…
You thought I’d run out of cute baby woodchuck pictures?
No, they’re still here.
And still adorable.
So there will be baby woodchuck butt shots….
Baby woodchuck eating apple shots…
Baby woodchuck following momma shots…
Baby woodchuck napping on the deck in the sun shots…
And various baby woodchucks just looking too damned cute shots for days, okay weeks, to come.
There’s even woodchuck baby I’m too fat fluffy to take a bath without falling over videos.
Which, btw…. took me two and half hours to upload to YouTube with our slow as molasses internet connection.
A little appreciation would not be unwelcome.
That’s better.
In case you didn’t know….
Don’t worry..
I do.
Did you know…. after the battle of Waterloo in 1815, dentures were made from the teeth of dead soldiers? They were given to wealthy people who experienced tooth decay due to consuming too much sugar.
I’m not sure how bad my teeth would have to be before I wore a dead man’s… but I’m guessing pretty bad.
Did you know….. mosquitoes are attracted to people who have recently eaten bananas?
This explains why I’m swarmed every time I start my morning with a smoothie.
Did you know…. castoreum, the vanilla flavored food additive used in baked goods can be listed as “natural flavoring” because it comes from the anal glands of beavers?
Thankfully it’s hard to procure and prohibitively expensive, so I doubt we’ll be finding it in our Twinkies anytime soon.
I’m sure the beavers aren’t thrilled either…
Did you know…. preparing an Egyptian mummy took upwards of 70 days, and dead noblewomen were allowed to ripen for few days prior to the procedure so the embalmers wouldn’t find them too attractive.
Makes you wonder just how desperate for a date those fellows were….
Did you know.… Kemosabe means “soggy shrub” in the Navajo language?
Good ole Tonto, not quite the faithful sidekick you thought he was.
Did you know…. woodpecker scalps, porpoise teeth and giraffe tails have all been used as currency at one time or another?
This is good news for me as I am currently awash in woodchuck poo and am hoping it will be the next monetary trend.
Momma gonna make it rain up in here!
green. Green. GREEN!
We had a very wet spring… and it looks like we’re going to have a very wet summer as well.
Our lawn is still part swamp, numerous perennials have drowned and I am beginning to feel moldy.
At times it feels like we’ll never dry out.
But the result of all this infernal moisture is green.
Sprawling lawns of verdant green…
It took us a little longer to get Casa River in shape this year….
Because as soon as the warm temperatures hit there was an explosion of growth.
My pink honeysuckle was glorious and grew twice as wide.
Every single shrub is screaming for a haircut.
And the plants aren’t the only ones growing.
We have a pair of foxes with a den in our woods. They come up every evening to feed and carry pieces back to their young.
The woodchucks babies are scampering every where and curious as all get out.
These two were fascinated with the husband’s wet, smelly work boots.
No accounting for woodchuck taste apparently.
Summer may have been long in coming…
But it looks like it’s going to be an abundant season.
Zapped!
So I cruised my followers list the other day and did a bit of belated spring cleaning.
Good bye mortgage company people, how to make money online people, unique items you can’t find anywhere else people….
If you’re blatantly a business and have never commented, liked or read a single word I’ve posted?
You’re outta here.
I’ve been blogging for more years than I care to count, and while I enjoy WP immensely… I have to say I’ve never been on a site that has so much digital commerce.
For pity’s sake…. I have salesmen knocking on my door trying to sell me boxes of frozen meat. I have telemarketers calling nonstop trying to sell me car warranties and vinyl siding. I have girlfriends trying to rope me into attending a dinner party so they can sell me Pampered Chef products.
Enough already! My blog is a sales free zone.
And I’m zapping.
(Sorry, cleaning analogies are over. But that’s a chicken…
Riding a vacuum cleaner…
While laying an egg.
These things must be shared.)
If you’re selling Cryptocurrency?
Please move along.
That’s not my idea of blogging.
Then there are these people…
They set up a site but never use it.
Why do you bother, and why do you always follow me? I engage with my readers damn it!
So…
It’s surprising how many of these followers sneak in without you noticing.
When’s the last time you checked your list? I bet you have 50 or so lurking like I did.
Start zapping. It feels good to kick them to the curb….
Unless you’re one of those bloggers who needs a high follower count for personal validation.
Then by all means, you do you.
Feel free to have a bloated list.
I won’t judge.
Okay, maybe just a little.
The Meyer Briggs test said I have to…
P.S. Sometimes I write and schedule blogs upwards of a week in advance. Since writing this?
Five of the zapped are back.
Perhaps I’m more irresistible than I thought.
A little rain, a lot of alcohol.
Saturday we had tickets to an afternoon festival promoting local beer and food. It was called The Taste of Summer and was being held on the old Navy base. The band were friends of friends and we were looking forward to it. Until the heavens opened up on the way over….
It was raining, thunder was booming and people were standing on line wearing trash bags.
We sat in the car for a while, thinking it would pass… which is when it started to hail and festival goers ran for cover.
Seeing that trash bags aren’t a good look for me, and I generally prefer to do my drinking while dry…. we left and headed for Boothbay Harbor.
Which is always a good idea.
Boothbay is one of our favorite places to walk…
To sight see…
To eat…
And yes, to drink.
(Don’t be shocked, it’s been know to happen on occasion.)
First stop… The Boathouse Bistro.
Best damn food in Boothbay Harbor.
Appetizers were Coconut Lime Ginger Mussels for the husband and my friend.
Those babies were huge!
Cajun Shrimp and Cheesy Grits for me.
I hate grits. I love these.
Enough said…
A Harborside Lemonade and a Summer Bliss later, I dove into Pan Seared Scallops on Parmesan Mushroom Risotto with Citrus Wilted Arugula. You could have killed me right then and there… and I’d have died happy.
Husband had a deconstructed Beef Wellington with split lobster tail and goat cheese mushroom compote.
Girlfriend had 2 rum punches and a Bourbon Brown Sugar Glazed Ribeye with rosemary fingerling potatoes and broccolini.
We were happy campers.
But onward.
Technically it already had, we were two cocktails in… but the bar hopping portion of our afternoon/evening will now commence.
Trust me when I say a good time was had by all.
Second stop… The World is Mine Oyster. A bit of a dive, but keep walking… through the hallway, up the winding stairs, thru the restaurant and out on the deck?
One of the best views of the harbor.
And 2 sea green margaritas.
Life is good.
Third stop… The Harborside Tavern.
This was a place we’d never been before and though we sat at the bar instead of enjoying the view….
One extremely strong bourbon filled Perfect Storm later?
I didn’t much care. The bartender was so heavy handed she either loved us.. or hated us. I still don’t know which.
Fourth and final stop…. The Boothbay Harbor Inn, where things got interesting.
Needless to say we were feeling no pain by then.
This is across the harbor from where we started and has a beautiful view as well.
Our bartender was an adorable little exchange student from Romania named Meihi.
With whom my soon to be divorced friend was instantly smitten.
Of course Happy Hour Blueberry Mules may have had something to do with that.
At this point it started to pour again….
So what else could we do but stay and drink?
We drank. And made friends with a group that was staying at the inn.
We drank. And watched the cute bartender play bar games.
We drank. Until the sun started to set and I figured we shouldn’t drink anymore.
For this…
My cheeky friend flipped me off.
Sunset.
In Boothbay Harbor…
Is a beautiful thing.
My girlfriend trying to pole dance on the parking meter?
Not so much.
Clearly some of us had a better time than others….
Sunshine Blogger Award
With thanks to Nowhere Tribune for the nomination.
He thinks my posts are fun…
So there!
Rules:
Thank the Blogger that nominated you.
Answer the questions.
Nominate new blogs to receive the award and in this case, ask them to list 5 to 10 random facts about themselves.
List the rules and display the Sunshine Blogger Award in your post/or blog.
Notify the nominees about it by commenting on their blog post.
Since my normal blogs are already filled with completely useless, random tidbits of my life this might be a challenge…. but I’ll give it a whirl.
1. I can’t tolerate nuts in any form. Don’t hide them in my salad or ruin my ice cream with those nasty little things. And if you come near me eating peanut butter? I will don my gas mask and cover you in Febreze … blech!
2. If I step in or on a boat…. and it moves? That boat is too small. I may live in Maine, surrounded by water, but I’ve been dumped in the ocean (lake, river, etc.) by too many canoes and punts in the past to venture out on anything tiny ever again. Uh uh. In my 50’s? It’s all about holding on to my margarita while boating. Kayaks need not apply.
3. In my teens, I snuck into a night club through a rest room window. No one was in the stall at the time… and thankfully, it was the ladies room. But I landed head first on the toilet and that’s never good.
4. I have the feet of a 90 year old woman. People say I don’t look like my mother, but I sure as hell inherited her deformed feet. Bunions, the beginning of hammer toes…. I’m prematurely geriatric from the ankles down and a podiatrist’s wet dream.
5. As I child I never got to act in the class plays. While my friends were Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz? Or Betsy Ross on Independence Day? I was the narrator because I was always the only kid who could read quickly and correctly without missing a beat. Not nearly as much fun, but at least I didn’t have to memorize anything….
Okay, he wins.
Grass is worse than narrator any ole day.
So there you have it, 5 randomly ridiculous things you might not have known about me.
Huzzah! Your life is complete.
Of course having to nominate only 5 people off the long list of fabulous blogs I follow is the worst part…
I love you all equally. But rules are rules.
My 5 –
Angel Who Swears because she is snark incarnate and I admire that in a person.
Wayward Sparkles because she always makes me laugh, and sometimes snort.
The Rebel Fish because I haven’t been able to figure out how Tim’s mind works yet, but I’m sure there’s an aardvark scrambling around in there somewhere.
Actual Conversations With My Husband because she’s a little bent, and eavesdropping on their conversations is an absolute hoot.
Go Jules Go because sharing the crazy journey she calls life is a rollicking good ride.
So if you want to play along, tell us 5 things we don’t already know about you.
And if you could care less?
I get it. Feel free to ignore me…
It won’t be the first time.
We will prevail….
Time for our annual battle with the flowering quince.
My husband hates trimming this bush. Hates it with a passion.
The monster is covered in thorns and not easily tamed. Cutting a path through uncharted Amazon rain forest while being chased by pygmies with poisonous darts might actually be preferable.
Every year we do it, and every year he grumbles.
This year he suggested using the chain saw.
But I had visions of this:
And managed to dissuade him.
I started with the electric hedge trimmer…
And managed to cut smaller branches away from the house.
Then the husband brought the ladder and the muscle.
Quince bushes are hard wood, and mature ones like ours fight back.
I was tempted to suggest something like this:
But managed to hold my tongue.
While he was angrily hacking away at that, I moved over to the also out of control Burning Bushes.
These turn a vibrant red in the fall and are much easier to trim.
But I didn’t get very far because hidden in between them and the boxwood? I found a catbird’s nest.
No, not that kind.
This kind.
And I scared the poor mother right off it.
(Worry not, she’s back.)
Avoiding the nest meant the bushes are still large, but at least you can see the windows now. The top half anyway.
As for the quince…
My idea of a neatly shaped shrub differs greatly from the husband’s …
But he had a sharp implement in his hands and I figured I shouldn’t push the issue.
Yes, dear.
It looks fine.
I wish WordPress had Smell-O-Vision.
I really do.
Because it’s apple blossom time at Casa River.
And next to lilacs, they’re my favorite natural scent.
We had a long wet spring….
And now even the smaller trees are bursting with blooms.
Every little branch is covered in fragrant blossoms…. and when the breeze blows?
Pure heaven.
But since Smell-O-Vision isn’t available, you’ll have to take my word for it.
It’s that good.
Fun fact : Every tree we’ve planted in the past 15 years?
Dead.
I don’t know why… they just died. Some lasted a few years, others mere months.
But this apple tree?
The one I didn’t plant? That must have sprung up from a floating seed….
Grows 3 feet every summer.
And this year, it’s bee nirvana.
Sorry..
I had to.
More baby chuckers!
Remember how I warned you there would be more pictures of baby woodchucks than you ever thought possible future photographs of our backyard wildlife?
It starts now.
Calm down, they’re babies and they’re cute.
How bad can it be?
In the evening, it usually goes like this…
Mother woodchuck comes out to see if the coast is clear.
And must give some kind of silent signal…
Because before long….
The little ones are scampering around everywhere.
They love our deck and run back and forth so quickly it’s hard to snap a shot.
Two of them chase each other around and love hiding under the grill cover…
While the other two are busy eating deer grain.
With their mother…
Who is in serious need of an 18 hour bra.
Sorry girlfriend, but it needed to be said.
I know you can’t un-see that.
Apologies.
Maybe this bit of cuteness will make up for it.
He doesn’t quite have the hang of it yet…
But he’s trying.
River's world..... 