She’s baaaack.

October 31, 2020 Rivergirl 14 Comments

I thought maybe we’d seen the last of her.

But no, she was out back stealing chopped up deer apples yesterday.

She was back on the patio table.

And there’s only one reason for that. Do you know how sick and tired I am of finding small pieces of rotted apple every time I sit down?

And then of course there’s the poo.

She leaves it there on purpose, I know it.

And may I just say, sipping from puddles of rain water filled with your own poo?

Not the least bit appetizing.

And please note… in that last picture? She is literally pooping. Am I a great photo journalist or what!

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Pandemic humor.

October 31, 2020 Rivergirl 14 Comments

Let’s keep laughing for as long as we can.

Me neither.

And that’s just wrong!

Personally, I would love a pet skunk. They’re affectionate and trainable to a litter box. We have them visit under our bird feeders every night and they are absolutely, positively, frickin’ adorable! But Maine made it illegal to capture and de-scent the little buggers years ago, so boo to that.

Yup.

That looks about right.

Pulp Fiction – 2020 style.

And if you don’t believe in masks but are still responsible enough to wear one?

Voice your protest responsibly.

And for the record? My hips don’t either…

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Products you’re too embarrassed to admit you want.

October 30, 2020 Rivergirl 29 Comments

But I know you do.

Admit it, we’ve all wanted to feel a little warmer and cheesier this year.

This gives a whole new meaning to the word shortcake.

Skin as soft and supple as a nice juicy brain? What woman doesn’t dream of that!

I have to admit this one might have validity. We live next to a horse farm and see our fair share of flies. A real life arcade game with salt bullets… hmm.

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I defy you.

October 30, 2020 Rivergirl 28 Comments

Yes, you.

You annoying fake blogger who follows me every single day…

With different fake pages…

And different fake names.

I defy you, and remove every last one of your cursed fake sites.

If you think you’ll out stubborn me?

I fear you’ve met your match.

My Whack a Mole record is legendary.

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Keeping a (blue) eye on Bambi.

October 29, 2020 Rivergirl 10 Comments

It’s been fun watching this little fawn grow up.

Although sadly we’re watching his mother decline at the same time.

Those blue eyes just slay me.

Of all the deer we’ve had over the years, this is our first blue eyed visitor.

Little one stays close to mom.

Hope she’s around long enough to teach him what he needs to know…

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End of the (veggie) line.

October 29, 2020 Rivergirl 28 Comments

Our final CSA harvest from the farm across the street was picked up yesterday.

Peppers, turnip, tomatillos, parsley, basil, leeks, fennel, radishes, carrots…

A fabulous watermelon I wish we’d seen more of this past summer…

And this:

A beautiful thing I had to look up.

I’d never heard of it. And after sampling a little? I was glad. Mountain meadow my *ss.

Blech! Shiso was a great big no no.

But apparently it’s very popular in Japan where they use it in sushi and drink it as tea.

Can’t say the pesto looks very appetizing.

Or whatever the heck that is. If I didn’t know better I’d say marinated dog poo on rice.

Well, to each their own. But take my word for it, it is popular.

I have no idea what that says, but yeah. I’m still going to pass.

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Are you one of those people?

October 28, 2020 Rivergirl 33 Comments

You know the ones, they pick up every free paper or publication they see no matter the subject?

Proctologist Monthly?

Yes.

Belt Sander Enthusiast?

Sure.

The Do It Yourself Lobotomy Newsletter?

Why not.

It probably won’t surprise my regular readers to learn my husband is one of those people.

Free is his favorite word.. which is why he came home with one called the Maine Agricultural News the other day.

My husband, the man who’s never planted anything (other than free trees he lets die) in his life.

Here are a few fascinating highlights:

Color me proud. My state is one of the top 5 potato chip potato producers.

And lord knows I do my part to keep the Lays company in business.

The Pomological Society? There’s a sought after membership if ever I saw one.

For those who don’t know, Maine blueberries are highly prized and big business up this way.

But thanks to President Trump’s Chinese trade war, among other things… the berry news is decidedly blue.

And finally, disaster.

Say it isn’t so!

Maine craft brewers have cut back on the production of beer to make hand sanitizer?

Oh, the horror.

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Why does he make everything twice as difficult as it has to be?

October 28, 2020 Rivergirl 39 Comments

We have a barn that really isn’t a barn. What started out as storage space for motorcycles and lawn mowers has morphed into a custom built man cave… and now that the man cave has a heat pump? The upstairs has to be temporarily blocked off for winter before the staircase turns into a chimney.

This should have been a simple project.

I told the husband – cut a piece of insulation foam. The heat pump installer told the husband – cut a piece of insulation foam. The friend that helps him now and then told the husband – cut a piece of insulation foam.

Which is why the husband made a hinged door out of zip siding.

Did I mention the husband doesn’t like to be told what to do?

After a laborious day of cursing and figuring and adjusting and fitting and more cursing….

The husband came home to cut a piece of insulation foam.

Which he wanted to attach to that hinged door of zip siding.

This involved more measuring and cutting ..

And fitting and pushing and removing and more measuring and cutting.

Please note the non OSHA approved chunk of wood dismantling the saw’s safety feature.

More fitting.

More measuring and cutting.

More fitting.

Halfway through the process, Mike Pence stopped by to say hello.

And finally after I helped him measure, cut and fit for 3 hours to no avail… I snuck out.

For the sake of my sanity…. as well as our marriage.

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All present and accounted for.

October 27, 2020 Rivergirl 15 Comments

It’s turkey season.

And that doesn’t bode well for our fine feathered visitors.

Momma brought her seven babies for their first nosh under the bird feeders a few months ago…

And they’re all still with her.

You go momma.

They’re comical birds to watch.

Like big brown chickens who gobble instead of cluck.

Though her babies are almost full grown, momma is still vigilant…

And takes off at the slightest perceived threat.

Picture of pretty backyard trees included… just because I can.

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Random drivel.

October 27, 2020 Rivergirl 29 Comments

Before walking to the mailbox yesterday, I was unaware a voting report card even existed.

But huzzah!

I think I got an A.

And if there’s anything better than walking into your local grocery store and finding the Kool Aid man wearing a hat full of handmade hedgehogs?

I’m sure I don’t know what it is.

Now, I don’t claim to be the brightest bulb in the pack…

But I’m not so dim that I get easily confused by plaid. (Unless I’m throwing back shots. When that happens, I can barely figure out how to open my purse.)

And finally, Maine.

We rarely make the top of any list unless it’s moose or lobster centric so I was quite pleased to see we were number 2 in the fewest amount of Covid cases from June to mid October.