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I saw a list of what were supposed to be helpful survival tips online the other day and after reading the first few… I knew I had to share.
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Now call me crazy, but I never thought doing a striptease would be the first line of defense for any dangerous situation no less being chased by a giant bear in the Arctic.
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How bizarre. Do electrical fires really smell like fried haddock?
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Right.
Chased by a polar bear – clothes off.
And after you have hypothermia from out running a polar bear in the nude – – clothes on.
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And me with no coloring books or crayons. Damn.
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This last one was an ad on the page, and if you want to pee faster and stronger? Sorry, you’re on your own. I know better than to click. .
😉
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Uh..never had i ever had the (t)inkling to want to pee faster & or stronger
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Clearly someone does…
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Clearly 🙄
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This reminded me of the old saying “Don’t burn the candle at both ends.” If applied to crayons, you’d only have enough light for 15 minutes instead of half an hour, so my helpful survival tip is: Don’t burn the CRAYON at both ends.
You’re welcome.
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Funny… just a few days ago, I read that all mammals pee for approx the same amount of time. Not volume, just time to expel that volume. I don’t believe it… horses and my cat, Mabel, seem to pee for a really loooooong time.
I had a fun mental image of a burlesque striptease for a polar bear.
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There’s never a pole when you need one.
🤣
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I was beginning to doubt these were even real tips, but that is exactly what happens to people experiencing extreme hypothermia. I’ve always thought that was pretty alarming, to say the least.
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It’s bizarre. I mean, you’re literally freezing..
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I had heard the one about taking off your clothes if a bear is chasing you – I wonder how that would work with an alligator?
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I’m guessing not. They’re used to seeing people in what’s basically underwear…
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I’m like….clothes sniffing polar bears, burning crayons and peeing exercises, what the hell!?!
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Just bringing you another high quality post…
😉
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I’m gonna click on that ad so the next time I encounter a polar bear, I can challenge him to a yellow snow name writing contest. Winner doesn’t die…
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Good luck with that.
😉
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Well, with other Bears, you are supposed to make yourself larger and make noise..not Run away! Why would you get that close to a Polar Bear in the first place?
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An accidental meeting…?
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Here’s hoping we all have our polar bear attacks in the tropics.
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I’ll be in trouble either way…. always hot flashing and going coatless.
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