Do you really and truly ever know anyone?
Recent events have caused me to question this.
Example #1 – A very old friend of ours from the Marine Corps days. A country boy from North Carolina, married his high school sweetheart, 2 beautiful kids, gorgeous farm house, a Christian conservative, loved his momma etc. etc…. Five years ago he dumped them all, moved to D.C. and married a ballsy independent career woman. Bought a large boat, got a high paying new job in financial management… and said he was living the dream. We were shocked. Two weeks ago? He dumped wife #2 and moved on to wife #3, who is younger, blonder and richer. Turns out wife #2 had bailed him out of bankruptcy twice and refused to do it again. He’s turned his back on his kids, doesn’t speak with his family, is head over heels in debt, and has a whole new set of high income drinking friends. I seriously don’t know who this man is. And now I wonder if I ever did. ( And oh, btw? His current job? The Federal Government’s office of financial management. Yay for all of us. )
Example #2 – I recently reconnected with an old friend from my teenage days. She’s been happily married for 25 years to a guy’s guy. Flannel shirts and boots, antique auto restorer, always in the garage under an engine. A real grease monkey gear head. In late September he called her into the living room and said he had something to tell her. When she walked in, he was wearing her short black dress, her high heels and way too much of her makeup. He told her he was transitioning into a woman and wanted her to stay in the marriage as a lesbian. She had absolutely no clue! None! And to add insult to injury? The homebody husband who never wanted to go out to dinner, who never touched alcohol, who never took a vacation trip and who hadn’t left the state in 15 years… is out clubbing, dancing, drinking and going away for weekend holidays.
Do we ever really and truly know anyone?