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Last week my husband came home from the store with a leash and harness for Lord Dudley Mountcatten. I wasn’t thrilled with the idea… and neither was Lord Dudley Mountcatten.

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Have you ever tried to put a harness on an uncooperative feline? It’s a lot like herding wombats, only bloodier.

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And while his Lordship has wanted to go outside since we got him…

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I doubt this is quite how he envisioned it.

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If looks could kill… we would have been dead on the spot.

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My husband quickly learned that walking a cat requires an infinite amount of patience.

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For every 10 steps Lord Mountcatten walked?

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He spent 10 minutes sitting, biting at the harness and glaring up at us as if to say this contraption is robbing me of my dignity, not to mention my will to live.

Making the decision to keep him housebound was hard, as all our other pets were free to roam outside. But after losing one to a speeding car and then watching Dudley run right for the road the one time he got loose, I was okay with him being under house arrest.

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I mean really, it’s not such a hardship to be waited on hand and foot by your human staff and pampered with an endless supply of catnip.

The whole walking on a leash scenario seems like the ultimate tease to me. A taste of freedom without being free. But the husband thinks it’s wonderful and plans to continue. Time will tell…

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