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Bringing you all the news that’s not fit to print every Monday… just because I can.
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Have we been doing this?
I was unaware.
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I suppose that would be handy if you get the urge to bake Martian bread.
Just knock down a wall.
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This explains so much.
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My first thought on reading this?
You’re an idiot.
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And look. I was right.
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Woodchucks are a type of marmot and we have an entire woodchuck family under our barn.
My sandals are scared.
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River's world..... 
Stealing my shoes? Maybe those are the robot marmots.
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Buy a lockable shoe rack, I guess. Don’t use number lock, marmots are intelligent!
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You should start keeping your sandals under lock and key. As for shaming birds…do they actually…ahem…you know…? We all started as poop? Must be a lot of it! $4000 for a robot dog that you can’t even offer a belly scratch to release office tension? In India, that is enough money to buy an entire dog pound along with the land and several years worth of food.
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