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More news.

All of it useless.

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He wants you to keep your urine and use it as fertilizer.

Yeah, that’s not happening here.

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Yes friends, you can be the proud owner of a 26 foot tall building shaped like a blueberry. A price hasn’t been announced yet, but really… does it even matter?

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If our resident red squirrels hear about this, we’re doomed.

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A portal?

Maybe, but not to another world.

🤣

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Jay Leno is a decent human being. When we visited Newport, Rhode Island twice last year we heard a lot of locals speak of him fondly. He has a large waterfront home there but appreciates being able to go into town without any fanfare. He frequents local shops and restaurants, watches local high school games and has been known to browse the farmers market. Caring for his wife who has advanced dementia at home and donating time and money to local charities has endeared him to Newporters and this story is further proof.

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Home baked cookies.

Somehow I can’t see Elon Musk or Jeff Bezos being quite as gracious.

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That’s a whole lotta of pie!

🥧

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Starting your week off right.

One Monday at a time.

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Moving is the only acceptable answer.

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In case you were wondering.

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180 cases in 88 years isn’t too bad.

Unless it’s your brain that is.

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Whaaaaaat?

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That thing would wreak havoc on the subway.

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Aside from the mimosas, this won’t bother me a bit.

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Leave it to Italy to start the flashing.

🤣

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Still here.

Still useless.

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Uh uh.

No cockroach milkshake for this chick.

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Yes, she lost control of her bowels while running and kept going…. with the excrement, well… how shall we say? Dispersing.

🤢

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Thankfully the teeth belonged to wolves, deer and bear. Not great aunt Edna. That would be tacky.

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Of course it does.

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Apparently it had a hand crank.

Make of that information what you will.

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I’ve been known to squeal over a fine piece of chocolate, but I don’t think I’ve ever gone ultrasonic.

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Bringing you all the news that’s not fit to print every Monday… just because I can.

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Have we been doing this?

I was unaware.

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I suppose that would be handy if you get the urge to bake Martian bread.

Just knock down a wall.

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This explains so much.

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My first thought on reading this?

You’re an idiot.

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And look. I was right.

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Woodchucks are a type of marmot and we have an entire woodchuck family under our barn.

My sandals are scared.

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More pointless facts to fill your brain.

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Unless they settled the age old boxers vs briefs debate? I’m not sure I care.

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Sadly it doesn’t. And it’s a knee friendly exercise, so… damn.

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While it would feed a lot more people than my usual chicken, I’m not sure I’m up for fixing that much stuffing.

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I just finished watching Monarch – Legacy of Monsters with Kurt Russell. Lesson learned?

Do Not Explore The Underground Forests!

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Here’s a novel idea …

Stop fracking.

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I can’t speak for everyone, but personally?

No.

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Because it’s Monday and that’s how we start the week here.

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I’m going to go out on a limb and say it’s because he was born, raised and still lives here… but what do I know?

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Thankfully she didn’t open it.

Ick!

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Best.

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Wedding photos.

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Ever.

💕

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Robots creep me out. Always have, always will.

The robot Olympics were funny because so many of them crashed and burned, but when they all marched in like an invading army? I literally cringed.

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https://youtube.com/shorts/DoGA9K7-p6A?is=KZiOrJ9pwbOzFlCo

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We’ll be sorry. Trust me on this.

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Kudos Australia. Almost every living thing there can kill you already, so I guess nuclear apocalypse isn’t that big a deal.

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Still here.

Still useless.

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Weed vomiting is now a thing.

Partaking of the chronic was so much easier in my day.

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Doing their part to keep Portland weird.

Carry on boys.

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Cake topper?

Why not.

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Probably not, but it will certainly make men want to.

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That’s a 911 call you don’t hear very often.

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Taking the term camaraderie to an entirely new level.

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🤣

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It’s extremely useless this week.

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This story begs further research… why was a lemur taking yoga? How did he catch herpes? But my algorithms are crazy enough, there’s no way I’m adding lemur herpes to the lineup.

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Have you heard about this ridiculousness?

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I’m speechless.

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Splinters.

Yikes!

😳

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Hey, if it means bypassing those long TSA lines? I’m all for it.

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I’ve never been to California, no less the La Brea Tar Pits… but if it’s burping up 2 million year old toads? Will one of my west coast friends please go and take some pictures.

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This makes me very glad I’m too old and decrepit to attend concerts.

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What the utter ****?

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What on earth is wrong with people? And don’t blame Covid. I’m not buying that as a valid reason.

🥴

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News is a term I use loosely these days.

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See what I mean?

Not sexy, just stupid.

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We haven’t had a dog for years…

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So will my readers who do please research this and report back?

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I rarely post political, but …

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This is the very definition of incompetence.

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Never be separated from your best friend… or a fresh seafood dinner.

Clever.

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Just in case that first story about stupid fashion wasn’t stupid enough.

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You can’t use it, and yet there’s so much of it.

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I have go out to dinner shoes, gardening shoes, beach shoes, snow storm shoes, long distance walking shoes and shoes I can’t wear any more due to a bunion.

What I don’t have are poop shoes.

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Clearly someone likes to say sh*t.

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A blood smoothie?

Thanks for that nightmare.

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I think I’m going to pass on this one.

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If you’ve ever watched The Last of Us? Trust me, dead fungus is the way to go.

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I had to laugh at this pic. Every time my husband and I see a duck in that position we yell butts up!

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Is the cloaca having a big year?

I’m so behind on the trends.

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My guess is they received a government grant.

Nice work if you can get it.

🥴

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