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Yes, stupid headlines are back. There are so damn many, I have to share…

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While it’s true I don’t have any children, I have often felt the need to turn a hose on one. *Note to self – inquire about teacher’s assistant positions in Kentucky *

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Oh FFS. Are we such delicate creatures that we can’t stand the full force of carbonated bubbles now? I fear for humanity, I really do.

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I’m not a sportswoman. Hell, my idea of exercise these days is bending over to scoop out the litter box… but if the breakfast of champions is beer? I may have to rethink my aversion to physical activity.

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