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Yes, stupid headlines are back. There are so damn many, I have to share…
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While it’s true I don’t have any children, I have often felt the need to turn a hose on one. *Note to self – inquire about teacher’s assistant positions in Kentucky *
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Oh FFS. Are we such delicate creatures that we can’t stand the full force of carbonated bubbles now? I fear for humanity, I really do.
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I’m not a sportswoman. Hell, my idea of exercise these days is bending over to scoop out the litter box… but if the breakfast of champions is beer? I may have to rethink my aversion to physical activity.
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River's world..... 
If I saw “Nitro Pepsi,” I’d assume it was supposed to be an energy drink. Not…… whatever that mess is supposed to be.
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It’s definitely a misleading name for something with less power…
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I want to know what they are teaching children in Kentucky that causes them to be frequently “hosed off”? Kentucky, the Bluegrass State, home to the world’s classiest thoroughbred breeding operations. I guess someone has to pick up all the horse shit in the fields to keep them “classy”! But isn’t that child labour?
It’s a Republican state. Probably child labour is legal, and the teachers collect the wages so they can own thorougnbreds! They can’t even afford to buy their employees safe working clothing!
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I believe it’s an outdoor, be at one with the natural world type of school. And back to nature must include mud.
😉
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Aw, just one school? I thought it would be State-wide. There’s a lot of horse shit in Kentucky. And almost as much, if not more, bullshit!
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horse shit comes off easier than tar sand.
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True enough. What state has tar sand?
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Alberta
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Most definitely. Thought you were American.
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I am
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So how did we get from school kids in Kentucky to Alberta’s tar sands? I fail to see the connections.
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Keep looking, it’s there.
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Sorry. Got too many other things on my mind and agenda these days. I was trying to be funny about hosing kuds off in school in Kentucky. Not even a joke, just looking at the ridiculous. Comic relief. Guess I’m not getting any of that anymore.
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Find some better material and/or work on your delivery. No one has to guess if I’m joking.
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Well , Kentucky is a bit closer than Maine….
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I’ve had the urge to turn the hose on some kids I’ve seen/heard. Especially at Albertsons or Walmart when they’re pitching a fit because they aren’t getting what they want 😡. That I put a plastic bag over the parents head for allowing these spoiled brats to just have their tantrum in public. I’ve actually tasted the Nitro Cold Brew…not bad but not good either. And beer to train? Where do I sign up?
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I meant that or put a plastic bag…..dick you autocorrect!!
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Beer training is my kind of cardio. Tap. Lift. Drink. Repeat. Quite a workout…
😉
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The Iron(wo)man champion probably fuels her body with beer because she thinks it’s less expensive than gas these days (though if you go by the gallon, gas is probably still cheaper — at least, for now)..
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I’ve often been tempted to haul dirty dishes into the backyard and hose them off. I could get behind the whole kid thing, too.
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Have the kids hold the dishes. Save water.
🤣
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Win/win!
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I drink Coke, unless I’m having a moon pie. Then it’s RC cola. Pepsi has always been quite a bit flatter than Coke but apparently not enough. Let’s look at this through our beer goggles and see if there’s any additional insight to be had.
I like Guinness. I generally won’t drink one all by itself, but floating on top of a black and tan, it’s excellent. The head is so silky you could just sit there watching the bubbles. It’s very enjoyable but that’s not all a beer is good for.
If it’s 95 degrees and you have been dancing with your shovel out in the yard for two hours, while that Italian sub you had for lunch is making a science fair volcano in your stomach, no matter how you may love it, at this time, Guinness is not the beer for you. Unfortunate situations often call for unfortunate resolutions and, in this case, that resolution might come in a shining silver can of Coors Light.
It’s, as I’m sure everyone who has ever had one knows well, almost completely lacking in flavor, and you’ll be sloshing like Grandma’s old wringer washing machine before you ever get started on a buzz.
Here’s the good part: It cuts all that gummy, dusty spit out of your mouth and extinguishes the volcano in your stomach with no annoying sour aftertaste. But wait! It gets even better. Remember all that old footage of atomic bomb tests, with the trees and buildings being blown away? That’s your belch, with the toxic Italian gas cloud for a topper. Also enjoyable. Everything else is just bubbles.
And I love Kentucky. It’s a beautiful place with lots of great people who don’t like Mitch McConnell or Rand Paul at all.
Good post, Riv, thank you.
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So much to unpack here!
I prefer Coke as well. Pepsi is too sweet. I remember RC from living down south but it’s not sold here.
I like Guinness, but find it a bit rich to drink more than two. Coors Light? No. Never. Rather drink dishwater.
I’ve never been to Kentucky, but we enjoyed Tennessee and managed to avoid politics altogether. The perfect vacation.
😉
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Yeah, Coors light was a bit heavyhanded, but in the fizz department, it is pretty much the polar opposite of Guinness, which makes the most delicious beef pie. I ain’t jokin’.
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Definitely. It’s great in stew as well.
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Now I’m thinking there will be a beef and Guinness pie in my future. For this bit of inspiration, I am promoting this post from good to great. Well done.
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I’ll take it. Enjoy!
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Pepsi without carbonation is well, syrup.
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Agreed.
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