I saw an advertisement the other day that made me do a double take.
This is one of those times.
Are we really doing this?
Baby Pod.
“The intravaginal device that entertains your fetus with an insertable speaker for your baby maker.”
It’s basically a small ( I hope! ) speaker that pregnant women can insert into their vaginas to play music for their uterine inhabitants.
Now while I’m usually down for any new tech that hits the market,
And I’ve connected my iPhone to a lot of different things over the years….
I admit this one gives me pause.
Here’s the science behind it:
Dr. Marisa López-Teijón from Institut Marquès said that her team studies the influence of music on embryonic and fetal development.”We’ve conducted a study showing that musical vibrations increase the chances that the sperm fertilizes the egg, i.e. that music improves IVF.”
Having found better results in in-vitro fertilization through musical vibrations for embryos, the researchers decided to apply their idea to fetuses.
López-Teijón and her team placed speakers on pregnant women’s abdomens during ultrasounds but found no fetal reaction. “In fact, gynecologists had never observed in an ultrasound a change on the fetus as a reaction to external noises or the voice of the mother,” the doctor explained.
“We decided that we had to bring closer to them the source of sound,” she continued. “We had to bring the background music into the uterus. And I had the idea of inserting a speaker in the vagina of pregnant women.”
I’m sure Apple Music and Spotify are thrilled.
For three months, the team evaluated 106 expectant mothers and their unborn babies’ reactions to intravaginal music. “We were pleasantly surprised to see the excitement of parents during ultrasound sessions to see the spectacular images of face, tongue and mouth movements of their babies,”López-Teijón said, adding that most patients wanted to repeat the experience and many more parents-to-be requested to participate.
I’m going to go out on a limb here and suggest seeing spectacular images of their babies faces isn’t the only reason mothers are feeling excitement.
Admittedly, I don’t have children…. so forgive me if I’m speaking out of turn.
But if this had been available during my child bearing years?
Junior would probably have ended up like this.
Yeah, but imagine them talking to their friends:
“I’ve been listening to this band for years”
“Yeah? Well, I’VE been listening to them since before I was born”
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And you know there must be some poor kids born with Barry Manilow embedded in their consciousnesses. Imagine them emerging from the womb humming Copacabana.
Terrifying.
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Or [shudder] “Mandy”…
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Oh!
The horror…
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I enjoy reading your posts, but this one had me laughing aloud. Thank you. Much needed.
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You’re quite welcome. I do enjoy sharing absurdity when I find it…
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ummmm.
yeah.
Nahhhh.
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But wouldn’t you like to meet the inventor?
“Stereo speakers. Hmm… where else can we put them?”
Yikes!
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LMAO!!!
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Welp, as long as it’s a way for some company to make money I’m sure this is a good idea.
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The company, yes. Anything to make money… but the baby and the mother?
No.
Just, no.
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How did you get access to my baby photos? I had a lot to do that day. A kid needs a drink now and then.
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A little gin in the baby bottle never hurt anyone…
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OMG, how ridiculous is it to advertise a vajayjay boombox for a fetus? I mean come the fuck on? I have three kids and let me tell you, as uncomfortable as pregnancy can get the last thing I’d want in my hooha at six or eight months pregnant is a baby stereo, ugh.
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I think it goes without saying this product was invented by a man…
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No way
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OMG! I am CRYING!!!
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I’m going to have to agree with you there.
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… I would need a few beers before I could put down everything in my head right now.
There is something to be said for abstinence …
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It is rather a head scratcher….
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Please. Get that beer and put them down…
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LOL! I try to show a little more class than I actually possess … 😛
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Awe, man. I was hoping for some alcohol-induced pearls of wisdom. 🍺🍻
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:: blink blink ::
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I think you have something in your eye…
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Ya, my finger.
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I suppose that’s appropriate considering the subject matter…
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LOL
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Reason # 987,932 that I am glad I am not a woman!!
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It’s a challenge, for sure. Speaker placement is worrying enough without having to worry about this location…
😳
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“I’m going to go out on a limb here and suggest seeing spectacular images of their babies faces isn’t the only reason mothers are feeling excitement.” I’m thinking if you cranked the volume up to boom box level, you could get a nice buzz. My ribs hurt from laughing, River.
Um. No. But if “Yes”, then I’m thinking I wouldn’t be sharing that earbud with anyone else.
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Oh Hell… I hadn’t even thought about sharing!
Ack!!
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OMFG! I. Can’t. BREATHE. *crying*
I don’t have kids, either but, headphones outside or singing tampon inside…it occurs to me that amniotic fluid would distort ANY sound. I question their *research*. That is tantamount to saying “experts agree”. Besides, I think they hear more than these folks suggest. They are in a womb, not a concrete bunker.
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And think of the psychological damage to baby if it’s formative months are non stop Justin Bieber….
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Have mercy…
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All I can say is “Baby, what a big surprise!” Might want to stay away from “Twist and Shout” until after the baby’s born. 🙂
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Ponder the heavy metal loving mom. It’s not like junior can change the channel…
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“I’m on the Highway to Hell…”
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Why wait until they’re in school to brainwash them…. let’s start feeding their minds before they’re even born! I can’t wait until the first time someone has their bass pumping so loud it’s shaking the entire neighborhood, and I find out it’s just some prego out for a morning walk…
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And I suppose asking her to turn it down would be rather… revealing.
😳
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LOL at that last meme!
I have children. I carried them. They don’t get to have accessories until they come out. Okay? Okay.
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A perfectly reasonable response. Give them the baby pod, next thing you know they want Beats.
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My kids don’t want to listen to my music now, I doubt they would have liked it in the womb either. I had never heard of this before, but this is something.
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Something else, yes.
I’m seriously hoping it doesn’t catch on.
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next step: fetus appropriate playlists? how would one know if the song is being liked? in general, the type of music must matter, even in IVF?
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One kick for yes, two for no…?
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Mama’s gonna make all of your nightmares come true…
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I like new tech, but no thanks.
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