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News you can’t use.

37 Comments

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Because it’s Monday, and I have to.

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If it requires citrus, I’m not sure I want to know.

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Future Olympic sport, right there.

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It had to be a red squirrel.

They’re evil that way..

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There are some activities that should never be social. This is one of them.

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No problem here, I don’t drink coffee. But please enjoy that morning cup of beetle poo… I’m sure it’s wonderful.

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37 thoughts on “News you can’t use.”

  2. Oh great. I’m drinking coffee right now.
    Usually these are truly pieces of news I can’t use, but today you opened with “because it’s Monday,” and I was like, “It is? Good to know.” (Summers can be like that for teachers.)

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    2. We have friends in Rapid City who have their hearts set on moving to Stillwater. Or did, until they heard how touristy it gets in the summer. Now they’re looking at a town maybe 15 minutes south of there.

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      1. Weird. I know I replied to this, but it’s not showing up. I’ll try again: Yeah, it can get that way, and for some reason it’s very popular with motorcycling groups who can be very noisy with their blaring radios – as if we all want to hear what they’re listening to. (#sturgis) But at least they’re forced to crawl through town because of the traffic. I think your friends made the right decision.

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  6. With you on the coffee abstinance. Community bathrooms aren’t so bad once you get over yourself. It’s our society that teaches us to be private. You must have used toilets at huge events. You’re just doing what comes naturally…

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      1. And please let us not forget the plastic palaces of poop. I think the Roman design would be less claustrophobic than a forty two cubic foot box of blue water scented stench and, since there were sewers in Rome, nobody had to be perched over a festering mound of other people’s doo doo.
        I feel like I’m in grade school, what fun! This the best news I can’t use in a long time. Thanks, Riv.

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    2. There’s nothing like a tour of duty in the navy to help you get over yourself. It’s not filthy, the heads are cleaned daily, but when you are sharing five pots among seventy five of your closest friends, it turns into a Blazing Saddles pinto bean dinner pretty quick and getting over yourself is really your only option. You don’t have to like it but you do have to accept it. Good observation.

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  9. Sorry, but avoiding coffee isn’t enough to avoid insect parts and poop. Many years ago, when I was working in a grocery co-op that sold bulk foods, the city health inspector tried to get us shut down, calling bulk food unsanitary. I went before the city council and read the FDA standards for things like insect parts and rodent droppings in various packaged products. They have very detailed standards as to how much rat feces can be in a can of tuna.

    A few current examples of limits: Berries: “Average of 10 or more whole insects or equivalent per 500 grams (excluding thrips, aphids and mites.” Chocolate: “Average is 60 or more insect fragments per 100 grams when 6 100-gram subsamples are examined) is prohibited.” Ocean Perch: “3 % of the fillets examined contain 1 or more copepods accompanied by pus pockets.” These standards are for “filth” (their word) that “pose no inherent hazard to health”. You can find more at: https://www.fda.gov/food/current-good-manufacturing-practices-cgmps-food-and-dietary-supplements/food-defect-levels-handbook

    If someone tells you to eat shit, you already do. If you think you’re a strict vegetarian, you probably aren’t.

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  10. Once a batch of coffee beans is roasted, ground and brewed the disgusting dreck is more in your mind than in your cup. Unless you drink Folger’s, which is all disgusting dreck.
    I’m sure the Romans built the habitare merda (I love Google) for a couple very good reasons; one being the absence of toilets in the vast majority of homes, the other, the generally distasteful and embarrassing nature of taking a dump in the street all alone. You know what they (Should) say: “Necessity is the mother of strange bedfellows”. Edinburgh has produced some of the best engineers ever but, long centuries after the Romans used and abandoned their public toilets, the citizens of Edinburgh were still throwing the yield of their morning constitutional out the window and into the street. The Brits have no room to talk.

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