Tag Archives: DIY

The project turns a corner…

 

 

Alternative title:  If we’d known it would be this much work, we never would have started.

A word of advice from a blogger who’s sore, covered in paint and has splinters where one should never have splinters..

 

 

Don’t remodel that old rotting garage. Let it fall to pieces on it’s own, bury the refuse and park on the street….. because what started out as “Let’s throw some vinyl siding on that puppy”  has turned into  “Oh, holy crap… we have to replace that too?”

 

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We’ve been working all weekend long, every weekend since mid August and never seem to get anywhere. The paper walls didn’t help, but neither did all the rotten studs and trim…. and once you start replacing a little, you have to replace a lot.

 

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So the woodshed has new walls.

 

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And we turned another corner.

 

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And ripped off more trim…

 

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And cursed the previous homeowner who used rusty railroad spikes instead of nails to Hell and back numerous times.

 

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Then the husband said, “We might as well put a new door in here too.”

(At which point I started cursing him to Hell and back under my breath.)

 

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Have you ever tried putting a brand new door on a 1970’s sloping, non standard, off center, dirt floored storage room?  Well, don’t. It’s not nearly as much fun as it sounds.

After two full hours of putting it in… and out… and in again…. I realized the husband is not highly proficient at cutting angles.

 

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But did I say anything? No. It will be covered in fascia anyway, and he probably heard my eyes rolling from across the yard…. so I’m good.

By Sunday evening we’d replaced walls and studs and trim and a door. We’d put up starter strip, J channel, corner posts, F channel, soffit, fascia, siding and sill trim.

 

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We were tired and sore.

 

 

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Oh, stuff it Morgan.

It may not look perfect, but it looks better. And right now?

Better is just fine with me.

I have piles.

 

 

 

 

No, not that kind of piles…. the remodel the garage type piles.

There are piles to go to the dump…

 

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Piles that the neighbor across the street might want.

 

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There are big piles.

 

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And little piles.

 

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And piles that the husband might want to use for something, someday… which really means never.

 

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That’s entirely too many piles!

If we were better acquainted,  you’d know how crazy this makes me.

 

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And if all those piles aren’t enough to make me  stab my husband with a fork  twitch, there’s this one:

 

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Which interferes with my late afternoon summer reading.

And that… can not be tolerated.

 

 

 

 

 

Because garages need facelifts too.

 

Work continues on the garage, and the paper walls are still a nightmare.

 

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Seriously, wth?

 

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The fact that it all has to be replaced with plywood means more time and money and work…

 

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And my instruction  to the husband to stop napping on the job was not well received.

Go figure.

 

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We turned the corner and I had to say goodbye to my beautiful daisies.

 

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Yeah, that was depressing.

But not as bad as the husband refusing to heed my advice to clean out the wood shed before he removed the panels…

 

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And having cement blocks fall on his toes.

I tried not to snicker.

Really, I did.

 

 

So, the woodshed was left pretty much like this.

 

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And progress was made elsewhere.

 

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The siding doesn’t exactly match the house, but in this light, it’s pretty close.

 

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And we’re getting there.

One wall at a time.

I’ll huff and I’ll puff…..

 

And I’ll blow your paper garage down.

(Alternate title – You have got to be sh*tting me.)

 After years of  relentless nagging  gentle persuasion, I finally talked the husband into replacing the old rotted siding on our garage this weekend.

He started removing it out front, which was fine.

(No plumber’s butt shots. You’re welcome.)

 

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Then he turned the corner…

 

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Started ripping, and found….

 

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Paper.  Lots and lots of paper….. but no walls.

Paper walls!

Fuckety, fuck, fuck.

There was literally nothing behind the old siding but paper.

 

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Who does that?

“Gee honey, wood is expensive. Grab me that spiral notebook and the trashy romance novel you were reading last week.”

Good grief, even the 2 little pigs used sticks and straw.

Needless to say, the husband was not amused at all the extra work this was going to entail.

 

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I tried to make light of it and told him we could have an awesome transom window, but  he had a hammer in his hand and a strange look in his eye  that didn’t go over well either.

To be continued….

(Face it, this project is going to take a month of Sundays and if I have to live through it? So do you. That’s the beauty of blogging! But if it makes you feel any better, I had a large splinter in my butt from rubbing against a piece of rough cut wood yesterday so …. I still get the worst of it.)

Men are very different creatures.

Example?

I’m neat and organized. When I start a job everything is laid out, prepped and ready to go.

The husband? Not so much.

His latest weekend project is putting up interior walls in our barn.

It’s a lovely barn, at least from the outside.

 

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And he built it by himself, nights and weekends for years.

 

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I love to sit on the porch and read….. but try not to go inside. It’s a large space and he’s filled it with totally useless crap.

So when it came time to put up walls? There wasn’t a lot of room.

 

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This is how he works.

 

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Clearing  a few feet as he goes along.

The very sight of it makes me twitch.

 

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And if you’re wondering why he has a microwave, a toaster oven and a broken water cooler in the barn? It’s because his office was throwing them out.

Need I say more?

 

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And yes.

That is a giant bullet behind the box of wooden shoe forms.

Please don’t ask.

Summertime is project time….

 

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And the garage/woodshed/storage building is getting a long over due vinyl siding face lift.

 

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First,  the  husband had to be bribed, cursed, nagged  rotted wood had to be replaced.

 

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And there was plenty of that.

Of course, we weren’t expecting the surprise the  lousy land beaver, Devil’s spawn  woodchuck left for us in the storage space out back.

 

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Dirt.

And tunnels.

 

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The little  bastard, rodent of Satan  darling had been busy.

 

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So we spent an hour and a half filling holes and smoothing earth.

I have a feeling this job is going to be the   end of my marriage, reason I drink   gift that keeps on giving.