.
We have wild turkeys that visit our backyard bird feeders to scrounge what’s fallen on the ground.
.
.
We’ve had flocks for decades and it’s never been an issue. They’re goofy…. and honestly, I find them quite comical to watch. But this past year, in which my husband has been home 24/7 hogging all the bandwidth teleworking… he’s taken an interest in feeding the birds.
The man who used to complain I bought too much seed and spent too much money on suet nuggets now glares at me if the 50lb pound bag falls below a quarter. And since he gets up at an unfathomable time of the morning ( pre sunrise people… WTF? ) he’s usually the first one out the door to fill the feeders.
If the turkeys visit in the spring, summer or fall? Fine. But in the winter their prodigious piles of poo land on snow and ice which is not nearly as absorbent as dirt and well…. let’s just say Tiny Tim isn’t going to be singing about tiptoeing through that anytime soon.
.
.
Hence the never ending battle my extremely stubborn husband wages on a daily basis.
.
.
This will go on for hours.
.
.
Even when he’s on the phone for work dealing with a man in violation of FAA regulations.
.
.
He chases them, they run to the edge of the property line and wait for him to go back in the house, they return, he chases them…etc, etc, etc.
If you think you’ve never met anyone more stubborn than a retired Marine? You’ve never met a Maine wild turkey.
.
.
The funniest part of his new hobby? As soon as he gives up and goes back in the office….
.
.
The turkeys call in reinforcements and descend en masse. He chased a dozen…. 26 came back.
And so it goes.
.
River's world..... 
When will you country folks learn turkeys, squirrels, etc., will always win!!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m learning, the husband isn’t.
LikeLike
My money is on the turkey’s every time! Tiny Tim! I’d forget about him ( thankfully ) . Great blog.
LikeLiked by 2 people
I wanted to forget about him, but he was too perfect for this post.
😉
LikeLike
He was always on the telly over here and to be honest he always was terrible and that’s being kind!
LikeLiked by 1 person
You know how sometimes things are so bad, they’re good? That wasn’t the case with Tim… he was just bad.
😉
LikeLike
He was that bad I had nightmares about him when I was a kid. Tiptoeing in my room with that terrifying voice.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Maybe we should bring him back to threaten today’s youth to clean their rooms.
👍
LikeLike
Even I think that’s a bit harsh!
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is great! He feeds them, then chases them away. No wonder they crap all over.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I know! You can’t blame them…
😉
LikeLike
I think the Wild Turkey mafia is going to be worse than Momma Squirrel and her bunch…🦃
LikeLiked by 1 person
More tenacious, but much less destructive.
LikeLiked by 1 person
One of the reasons I love reading you is the similarities I find between your husband and mine. Mine used to complain about money spent on bird seed and also corn cobs for our squirrels and now he is seriously into watching them. Also, while he always moved the baby bunnies before mowing and whatnot, he now feels akin to every rabbit in the hood. In the woods he’ll ask me what kind of bird. It’s a softening or something, and I like it, just haven’t gotten over the changes yet.
LikeLiked by 1 person
For my other half I think the forced time at home has let him appreciate the beauty of our fine feathered friends.
Except the constantly pooping turkeys of course.
😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Of course
LikeLiked by 1 person
This post reminded me how my father used to try to chase the mallards and Canada geese snoozing on our dock, leaving their green slimy poop behind. The birds always won.
LikeLiked by 1 person
And the turkeys are winning here as well. But it does make for an entertaining morning.
😉
LikeLike
This is hilarious. At least the hubby is getting in a good cardio workout every day!
LikeLiked by 1 person
He takes it so seriously I almost feel bad laughing. Almost.
😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
“He chased a dozen…. 26 came back.” I love that!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Poor man. He really thinks he’s winning the war…..
LikeLiked by 1 person
Stop feeding for a week. See what happens.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Stop. Feeding. The. Birds? Surely you jest.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Get. Rid. Of. The Turkeys.
Birds. Will. Return.
LikeLike
Why did you REMIND me of Tiny Tim? I thought I’d purged my memory of him and his method of getting through tulips…
LikeLiked by 1 person
He just popped into my mind as I was writing this post. And if I have to remember him… so do you.
LikeLike
My mum would have made a meal outta those turkeys by now. Maybe that’s who your hubby needs to get rid of the turkeys. I’ll send her right over!
LikeLiked by 1 person
No hunting allowed. I don’t care how much they poop.
LikeLiked by 1 person