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Because regular news is so depressing these days.

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I heard the rat is now drinking Bud Light and filing for unemployment while living in his mother’s basement. His podcast is scheduled to go live next Saturday.

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Because everything needs an update, even Jesus.

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I’m on the fence with this one. Please try it for me and report back.

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Is it a shoe? Is it a bag? What’s going on here….

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Cheese in individual plastic wrappers is not cheese. It’s orange dyed rubber and should be banned from kitchens everywhere. Do yourself a favor and make your grilled sandwich from a nice Gruyère or Vermont cheddar. Your taste buds will thank me.

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