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I came across these in Wal Mart’s garden section the other day….
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And my first thought was how did I not know you can grow cocktails?
My second thought was… I’m going to have to buy a rototiller.
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Need. More. Acreage!!!
Tag Archives: shopping
Of tables, poorly placed rabbits and disappointing food.
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After the husband decided on leather chairs for his man cave, the focus switched to a table to put in front of them. Having just spent two exhausting days in and out of a disturbingly high number of furniture stores, I was less than enthusiastic. And when I saw what kind of tables he was considering?
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(Tables should not have wheels!) I was even less enthusiastic.
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Thinking he’d taken leave of his senses, I cried Uncle and headed for the ladies room before our two and a half hour long drive home.
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And if there was ever a stranger place to decorate with rabbits? I don’t know where it would be. No one needs a fluffle of Thumpers looking over their shoulder in a bathroom stall. Talk about performance anxiety… geesh. ( And yes, a group of rabbits really is called a fluffle. Which, when you think about it… is totally spot on. )
On the way home we stopped at a restaurant we’ve always enjoyed but haven’t frequented since early 2020.
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Is the beer really better there? I don’t know, but they have an extensive list to be sure. They also pour some interesting martinis …..
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So naturally I indulged in two Prickly Pears. The drinks were fabulous…
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But tiny.. more like wide lipped shot glasses. And for $24? I’d like to take more than 4 sips.
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While the food looked wonderful, shrimp stir fry for me… Parmesan baked haddock for the husband… both were dry as a bone, overcooked and cool when they reached the table. French onion soup forgotten and delivered with the meal? That’s a big no no. By the time the husband started his fish, it was stone cold. A disappointing visit to a place we used to love.
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Out of state searching.
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I thought we’d decided on the leather chairs for the barn we’d seen the day before and were heading down to NH to purchase them, but I was wrong. For a man who claims to hate shopping, it amazed me how many different furniture stores my husband wanted to visit. Day 2? We spent 5 hours driving and 5 hours fruitlessly searching. Granted there were some truly horrible choices.
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White pleather power recliner with LED lighted cup holders?
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That’s a hard no.
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As were these fake snake skin monstrosities. We spent over an hour wandering around one store only to have my husband give up on chairs and focus on the handmade tables crafted entirely from reclaimed wine barrels on the way out.
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And yes, of course he bought one.
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This chair? Goldilocks deemed it too shiny.
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This chair? God help me, he said it was too “crunchy”. I was ready to throw in the towel and live with an empty man cave corner when… after 11 hours of plunking his posterior in at least 40 chairs over the course of 2 days…. he decided he wanted to go back to Jordans and buy the very first chair we saw.
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So that’s what we did. But the first salesman in Maine had neglected to tell us was the New Hampshire warehouse didn’t stock them and we’d have to wait a month or so for them to come in. Grrr. But order them we did, from the NH store (no tax!) and we received a 10% military discount. We also removed the delivery fee by agreeing to pick them up ourselves. Total savings? $630. Was it worth the aggravation? The jury’s still out on that one.
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You’ve got to be kidding.
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Lord Dudley Mountcatten has been a finicky eater. When it comes to canned food he won’t eat fish. He won’t eat anything grilled or in pieces. No meaty morsels, no shreds. Nothing with cheesy bites or creamy sauce. The little bugger won’t even eat tuna FFS. It took me a solid month of trying every brand under the sun… from cheap to ridiculously expensive…. to find one kind he liked.
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It’s the only brand and variety he’ll eat every single time. So you know what that means….. it’s now virtually impossible to find. In person or online, and believe me I’ve tried. Oh, I could buy it on eBay.
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Yes, you read that correctly. Apparently it’s still being made but there’s a disruption in the supply chain which is making it scarce…. so the price gougers are in full swing. Amazon?
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A little better, but still outrageous. Sorry Dudley… you may have to learn to like bologna.
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The search begins.
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The weather is getting warmer and that means the barn porch furniture needs to migrate from the man cave to its outdoor home.
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Which is going to leave a big hole in the room. Solution? Two manly leather club chairs and a table. Unfortunately this meant prolonged shopping excursions with the husband. And trust me… when it comes to picky, women have nothing on my other half. When we need new furniture, I usually do the scouting and narrow it down to 3 choices. Anything more than that overloads his senses. So imagine my unmitigated horror surprise when he suggested we make a day of it.
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Yes, that’s close.
Off we went down to Portland. First stop was Jordan’s furniture which is a truly massive multi level store. They had a nice selection of leather but nothing pleased the husband.
This was the first chair we saw and I thought it was perfect.
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The husband liked it, but wanted to keep looking.
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This chair? Too saggy.
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This chair? Too deep.
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This chair? Too small. Store after store after store and he didn’t like anything.
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Now don’t get me wrong, it’s a big purchase and I want him to be happy but after visiting 8 stores over the course of 6 hours, Goldilocks still wasn’t satisfied.
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The first chair had my vote and I lobbied hard. Nice grade of leather, perfect size, good color, and firm cushions. Husband wanted another look, so back to Jordan’s we went. He gave it a second test drive and agreed it was the best we’d found. I thought we were done and gave silent thanks to all the Gods I don’t believe in. Shiva, you rock!
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I positively swooned when the husband had a salesman print out an estimate thinking the ordeal was over…. but when my spouse found out their warehouse was in NH and there would be a $150 charge to deliver the chairs to Maine? He said we would drive to NH the following day. Five hours on the road, in his old 8 foot bed Ford pickup just to save $150. It will probably cost us that in gas.
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To be continued.
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I’m a sucker for fruit.
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I love fruit! I love it on my plate, I love it in my drinks and now I’m hoping to love it on my face.
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Enter some highly recommended moisturizer.
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Have you noticed this new trend in packaging? Cute little welcome notes whenever you open a box. Sorry folks, but I’m neither glowing nor part of your gang. (I’m currently picturing juvenile delinquent bananas with their peels undone standing on a street corner, smoking a cigarette and snarling at passers by.)
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Banana soufflé for your face, how bad could it be? They want you to add pineapple serum if you’re looking dull. Heck… if you add a little rum, my skin will perk right up. Guaranteed!
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I admit I was a tad disappointed with the minuscule size of this product. I mean come on, it’s made from bananas. It’s not like they’re rare.
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Vegan and cruelty free is great, but stating you’re free of sulfates and silicons on top of a list of chemicals I can barely pronounce doesn’t exactly scream natural.
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I had to.
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I mean really, how could I not?
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I broke down and ordered a sampler pack of perfume from a French company that takes themselves as seriously as I do. In other words, not at all.
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They embrace the bad reviews of their products and even use them in their advertising campaigns.
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And since I value a sense of humor above all else, I can’t imagine I’ll be disappointed. But don’t for a minute think is a gimmick. They don’t exactly give their stuff away.
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I Am Trash is one of their most popular fragrances. A revolting name, but an interesting idea.
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The ultimate in recycling. And as long as stray dogs don’t start following me down the street? It should be fun trying.
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Pandemic humor.
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Because we all need a laugh now and then.
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Wow. I might need to buy a new air conditioner.
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Don’t judge. It’s been a very long year..
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There’s a mental image for you!
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We do indeed.
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Rest assured, I will never be doing that.
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Technically that last one isn’t a pandemic meme. But if you’ve shopped for building materials lately… you know its pandemic related. Plywood has gone up about a million percent since last March. It’s insane!
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Shopping for cats.
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My Facebook page is currently flooded with cat related products. I’m not complaining, it certainly beats the ball wash and butt deodorant I used to see. And hey… if I enjoy doing beer flights?
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I’m sure Lord Dudley Mountcatten would not be averse to a flight of kitty chronic.
This next product looked promising for me winning the cat box war.
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Though ridiculously large, it’s self contained and would stop our furry menace from flinging litter.
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Hmm. Guess that’s a no.
And I hate to admit it but yes, I broke down and ordered something silly.
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A personalized mask of me and Dudley. Granted I haven’t worn a cropped, midriff baring blouse in 20 (okay, 25. Geesh!) years…. but the hair color and wide hips are pretty close.
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S Rioghal Mo Dhream
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Scotland. Home to fine whiskey, rugged highlands, a mythical lake creature, bagpipes, my ancestors… and haggis.
(If you don’t know what haggis is, consider yourself lucky and leave it at that.)
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Since the owner/bartender of our local pub is a Scot born and bred, I thought it might be fun to show up wearing a mask of my clan’s tartan the next time we drop by for a pint. Enter Amazon.
Sure enough they had one…
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Though by the look of the packaging, I’m guessing it was not made anywhere near a peat bog or by Clan MacGregor.
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Oh, and in case you’re wondering….
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The post title is my clan’s motto in Gaelic. Royal is my race.
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Well, yes.
There’s that too.
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