The greatest story ever… shown?


While I’ve been known to Bitmoji on occasion….




And used to see the appeal of texting miniature versions of myself to friends…




I read something this afternoon that made me do a double take.




There is now a Bitmoji Bible.




“In the year of our Lord 2019, someone recreated the Bible through Bitmoji. The Bitmoji Bible is more of a collection of a handful of stories found in Jewish and Christian holy scriptures than an actual translation told exclusively through Bitmoji. While much of the actually philosophical passages aren’t included — how are you supposed to discuss promises of salvation through a few cartoon characters? — you might recognize more well known myths, like the story of David and Goliath. “ 






Now I’m not a religious woman, and I admit to never having read the good book cover to cover…. but I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess David never said “Hey Boo” to the giant Philistine.






And if there was a Garden of Eden?

I somehow doubt their trees were in pots.







“Today’s children are more likely to read a text message than a book,” co-creator Daniel Eckler said through Twitter DM. “Given the Bible has been translated into more than 3000 languages, I thought it should be translated into one of the most popular contemporary languages.”



Jesus wept.

Repeat after me…

Bitmoji is not a contempary language, it’s a collection of bad cartoons.






Quoting an excerpt from Genesis about the whole world speaking the same language, Eckler believes it’s “important to speak to people in their language.”



So help me out here…
Is that Joseph?
And is he spitting his coffee out because Mary just told him about the immaculate conception?  






He notes that his goal isn’t necessarily to evangelize, but rather to open the door to higher thinking for people who may not already be interested in it — he references biblical redemption themes in Star Wars and The Matrix. “Not to say they’re substitutes, but as long as people are seeking spiritual truths,” Eckler said. “I think they’ll find them where they find them.” 
Let me get this straight…. to understand Christianity I don’t have to read the bible.
I just have to sit through The Empire Strikes Back?
Well if that’s the case…






I’m watching Game of Thrones instead.






It has mythical beasts, devout believers and frowned upon sex as well.  





39 thoughts on “The greatest story ever… shown?”

  1. How bizarre! Bizarre bizarre bizarre.

    I grew up in Liverpool and there is a scouse version of the Bible (I don’t know if it is the entire Bible Genesis to Revelation, or just parts of it). It is a bit silly really, just highlights the everyday lingo people use.

    I had read the scriptures were available in over 2,500 languages – but the quote you mentioned said 3,000. That is quite amazing really.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. but I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess David never said “Hey Boo” to the giant Philistine. <—I thought you were talkin' to ME! And I went EEEEEEKKKKKKKKK!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. New churches keep springing up as more and more old venerable structures are abandoned. The new ones look like motherships from planet Zork, or at least like skate board ramps. Sometimes, when out and about, we play a game called, “bank or church?”

    It might explain the Bitmoji Bible.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Okay, so I’m going to say I’m old school big time because I have no idea what Bitmoji is nor do I want to know. BUT, it I had to find out what it was/is you did a fabulous job of “educating me” with the above abbreviated Bitmoji lesson. I have to agree, kids now a days will most likely turn to their phones to learn about anything really which is sad. I was shocked when my youngest saw a record player for the first time, he was six and that was an amazing site to see. He hadn’t ever seen a vinyl LP, he’d only ever known CD’s, today kids will only know education via text, sad, truly sad.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. River,
    Yeah, yeah — Bible, bitmojis…shock and awe…not really all that shocked or awed. So few things surprise me these days. EXCEPT…I love your cartoon self. Spill, please. Where does one acquire a cartoon self? That’s amazing! Mona

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Pretty sure there was a lot more nakedness in the garden of eden than what is shown in this version of Bitmoji. Come on Bitmoji a bit more historical accuracy, please.

    I remember my daughters using Bitmoji a lot. They were spookily accurate in the images of my offspring.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. And here I thought you’d be talking about the Starbucks cup that made it onto the latest episode of GoT. Lord knows everyone else is talking about it to the point that I know. 🙄

    Liked by 1 person

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