Tag Archives: education

Update…. You’re Never Too Old To Learn.

 

I ran across a catalog for continuing education the other day, and because I used to have a  totally ridiculous  blog series about this, I had to look.

The series started  here back in August of  ’18 with a class on Spoonbending.

 

do-not-try-07ywoi

 

Shows what you know Junior. There’s a whole class devoted to that spoon.

Yes. An actual college class, I’m not lying.

(Or drinking… go figure.)

 

 

So when I saw this current class being offered, it simply begged to be blogged about.

 

Spoon Carving Level 2
Up your spoon carving skills and build on what was learned
in your previous spoon-carving class. This time around you’ll
carve a deeper serving spoon, as well as practice additional
refining and finishing. Prerequisites: Previous woodworking
experience or Spoon Carving, Beginner. Material fee of $15
included in the price of the course.

Wednesday, beginning Oct. 16, from 6 to 9 p.m. for 3 weeks

Cost: $75

 

Clearly our college is still obsessed with spoons.

 

19cni8

 

Well, that may be a different class entirely.

“Up your spoon carving skills?”

Who said I had any to begin with.

 

the_doctor_s_spoon_meme_by_starburstrainbows_d814vwy-fullview

 

“Carve a deeper serving spoon?”

Hell, that’s totally worth $75.

And I’m sorry…

But you know there can only be one possible instructor for this class –

 

images (1)

 

 

I bet you didn’t know…..

 

There’s a political party of beer lovers in Poland.

The PPPP…  Polska Partia Przyjaciol Piwa. They won 16 parliament seats before breaking up into smaller factions. The Big Beer Party and the Little Beer Party.

 

wXiKsgX

 

You didn’t know that.

But I did, because….

 

GUEST_093223f4-e3c8-4e44-a847-a9c0c2030952

 

I bet you didn’t know….

The unofficial mascot of Delta State University if the Fighting Okra.

 

0416okra1

 

But it’s true.

I once went 4 rounds with some fried okra… but I’m sure no one wants to hear about that.

 

I bet you didn’t know…

Snow angels originated from medieval Jewish mystics who practiced rolling in the snow to rid themselves of evil urges.

Maybe I need to try that the next time I want pie and ice cream.

 

1gmzo8

 

I bet you didn’t know…

Horseshoe crabs are bled for medical science.

 

images (1)

 

Horseshoe crabs use hemocyanin to carry oxygen through their blood. Because of the copper present in hemocyanin, their blood is blue. … Amebocytes from the blood of L. polyphemus are used to make Limulus amebocyte lysate (LAL), which is used for the detection of bacterial endotoxins in medical applications.

 

Run crab….

Run!

 

I bet you didn’t know…

In Athens, Greece a driver’s license can be taken away if the driver is deemed “unbathed” or “poorly dressed”.

 

Disturbing-Fashion-of-the-‘70s-9

 

Good thing this trend never caught on.

 

I bet you didn’t know…

F.Scott Fitzgerald’s novel This Side of Paradise was the first time the word ‘daiquiri’ ever appeared.

Rum… Paradise…

Makes sense to me.

 

 

download

 

 

 

 

Yes, this is real.

 

Ya gotta love New York City.

My late father worked on Wall Street and I grew up marveling at it’s magic and savoring the myriad flavors of it’s streets.

Now? My heart breaks for it’s citizens. The virus is testing them, but they’ll pull through. They’re resilient.

They’re New Yorkers.

Yes, it’s the city the never sleeps. The Big Apple. The home of Broadway, the Empire State Building and Katz’s Deli…. but what you really have to love about them right now?

This:

Yes.

The New York City Health Department is recommending masturbation.

 

Among other things.

 

 

 

 

 

Wording.

 

I love to word.

I love to read them, write them, and learn them.

And I love weirdo words most of all.

When you travel you hear words unique to certain regions and words used in different contexts.

Words!

Ya gotta love them.

 

unnamed

 

So when I saw this the other day?

I knew I had to share.

 

IMG_2757

 

I admit I’ve been known to make use of dingleberry, dicombobulated and kerfuffle now and then…. although I’m not nearly old enough to drop whippersnapper into a conversation any time soon.

In Maine we tend to say things are wicked. As in “That margarita is wicked good”  or “That beer is wicked cold”.

We also can lose control of our cars and end up in the  puckerbrush.

Mainers say  ayuh  when we mean yes.

We call submarine sandwiches Italians.

If you’re cute? We’ll call you  cunnin’.

If something is the best? We’ll say it’s  finest kind.

If you live far away from town? That would be the willy wacks.

And if you live really far away from town? That’s  bumblefuckEgypt.

 

you-call-them-curse-words

 

So educate me.

What words do you use in your backyard?

 

h24E06476

Part 2… of something I started a while ago then promptly forgot about.

 

Language.

By definition, the method of human communication.

Glorious varieties abound, so let’s take a look at some foreign words you may not be familiar with… and their meanings.

 

Shemomedjamo (Georgian)

You know when you’re really full, but your meal is just so delicious, you can’t stop eating it? The Georgians feel your pain. This word means, “I accidentally ate the whole thing.”

I don’t know about you..

But I have totally shemomedjamo’d in my day.

 

pie

 

Backpfeifengesicht (German)

A face badly in need of a fist.

Oh, I think we’ve all met a few of those.

 

3c35e9622ecc34a1b64a2065c29acce4

 

Faamiti (Samoan)

To make a squeaking sound by sucking air past the lips in order to gain the attention of a dog or child.

I’d just call it a whistle, but who am I to argue with a Samoan?

 

 

(Okay… so I was looking for a GIF of a big bad Samoan warrior when this popped up. Big bad Samoan bat will kick your *ss!)

 

Gigil (Filipino)

The urge to pinch or squeeze something that is irresistibly cute.

I have this every time I watch the movie Magic Mike…

But maybe that’s just me.

 

Magic_Mike_foto_film

 

Lagom (Swedish)

Maybe Goldilocks was Swedish? This slippery little word is hard to define, but means something like, “Not too much, and not too little, but juuuuust right.”

*See above comment and picture of Magic Mike cast*

 

Zeg (Georgian)

It means “the day after tomorrow.” OK, we do have “overmorrow” in English, but when was the last time someone used that?

Never.

No one has ever used overmorrow in my presence…. and I want you all to start right now.

 

imagesOLXDU22M

 

(Proof positive there is a meme for everything)

 

 

You’re never too old to learn….. LEGOS.

 

Next up in my continuing series on  the absolutely crazy things people will pay money for  Maine Adult Education is…. LEGOS.

Yes, LEGOS.

Those annoying little plastic toy pieces we’ve all stepped on and paid the price.

 

 

And while there have been some other ridiculous classes…

 

You’re never too old to learn…. Spoons.

You’re never to old to learn…. Potatoes.

You’re never too old to learn…. Ukulele

You’re never too old to learn…. Chakra Toning.

You’re never too old to learn…. Mindfulness.

You’re never to old to learn…. Tin Cans.

You’re never too old to learn…. Knotweed Flutes.

You’re never too old to learn… Succulent Picture Frame.

 

This one, and it’s  how the hell can we make this nonsense sound like a legitimate college course  description really made me laugh.

 

lego

 

Oh, it’s a facilitated process?  Well, that explains everything.

And they use specially selected LEGO elements! Wow.

Does that mean the red ones… or the green?

The group discussion would be interesting to hear. Problem solving and decision making? Give me a break… exactly what wisdom will you gain?

 

ras lego

 

Okay, there’s that.

But hey, you’ll be utilizing kinesthetic skills and will be required to learn and listen.

This is Serious Play!

Taught by a Serious Play facilitator!

 

 

Of course when I was young, the people who took LEGOS seriously usually ended up like this….

 

75b

 

But maybe times have changed.

 

 

Did you know….

 

The name of the novel that inspired the film Blade Runner was Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?

I do because…..

 

GUEST_093223f4-e3c8-4e44-a847-a9c0c2030952

 

I find it rather disturbing.

As should you…

 

 

Did you know…

La Brea means The Tar?  So when you talk about ‘the La Brea Tar Pits’ in California you are actually saying The The Tar Tar Pits.

Talk about overkill.

 

R4U31Az

 

Did you know…

Hindu men once believed it was unlucky to marry a third time so they avoided misfortune by marrying a tree? It was then burned, freeing them up to marry again.

I imagine it went like this:

 

 

Did you know…

 

Did you know…

Due to a different gravitational force, if you weigh 200lbs on earth….. you would weigh 76 lbs on Mars?

Come on Elon.

Momma needs a  trip to Mars.

 

 

Yeah, you’ll need to put that down first.

 

Did you know….

An octopus’s testicles are located in it’s head?

He also can remove his spermatophore-loaded mating arm and give it to a female if she’s hungry and likely to eat him.

 

octopus

I think this has to be a new series.

 

I read an article the other day that was so good it might need to become a blog series.

It’s about words.

 

 

Stop that.

It’s going to be great, I promise.

English is a funny language and apparently if it’s not your mother tongue, can be quite difficult to learn. So naturally it stands to reason there would be a large collection of foreign words with no direct English equivalent.

Let’s explore that.

 

  1. Kummerspeck (German)

Excess weight gained from emotional overeating.

Literally, grief bacon.

Grief bacon!

It’s official.

Kummerspeck is now my new favorite word.

 

4fc72c2daab0a

 

Do I like bacon?

 

7cf661773d7a2ee216eb57104d8cb712

 

Indeed I do.

Do I care that it’s bad for you?

 

l-6698-doctors-are-saying-that-each-piece-of-bacon-you-eat-takes-9-minutes-off-of-your-life

 

No. I do not.

 

2. Mencolek (Indonesian)

The old trick where you tap someone lightly on the opposite shoulder from behind to fool them.

 

Where was this word when I was young?

I totally slayed  Mencolek in the 3rd grade.

 

43913992_294698614478828_487792242756488857_n

 

 

3. Seigneur-terraces (French)

Coffee shop dwellers who sit at tables a long time, but spend very little money.

 

Funny….

In English we just call them cheap.

 

when-money-is-tight-13

 

4. Slampadato (Italian)

Someone addicted to the UV glow of tanning salons.

I think we all know one of those.

 

Meme---Fine-line-between-a-tan-and

 

And finally..

5.  Pana Po’o (Hawaiian)

To scratch your head in order to help you remember something you’ve forgotten.

This is not a technique I’m familiar with, but then I’ve never been to Hawaii so what do I know?

 

meme20-7

 

But to hell with remembering where the keys are …

This is pure brilliance.

Who knew?

 

I did,  because…

 

GUEST_093223f4-e3c8-4e44-a847-a9c0c2030952

 

Did you know…

The phrase “hands down”  (as in “He won that game hands down.”)  was first used in the 19th century to describe a horse racing victory? It signified the jockey was so far ahead he could drop the reins and relax his arms.

 

 

Well, not quite.

 

Did you know….

Bruno Mars played an Elvis impersonator as a child in the 1992 film Honeymoon in Vegas?

It’s true.

 

thumb

 

 

 

Did you know….

Mosquito repellants do not repel, they hide.

The spray blocks a mosquito’s sensors so they don’t even know you’re there.

 

imagesA539UN7R

 

Did you know…

During WWII, America tried to train bats to drop bombs.

Silly Americans, what were we thinking?

Bats won’t even play fetch.

 

 

 

Did you know….

The Roman emperor Caligula made his horse a Senator.

Maybe we should try this….

It can’t be any worse.

 

 

Bill-Clinton-Funny-Political-Meme-Picture

 

Did you know…

The Bible has been translated into Klingon?

 

 

Well, you do now.

I bet you didn’t know….

 

Flying fish and Coo Coo is the national dish of Barbados.

 

i-don-amp-039-t-give-a-flying-fish_o_1639057

 

But I did, because….

 

GUEST_093223f4-e3c8-4e44-a847-a9c0c2030952

 

Did you know….

When CBS broadcast the first ever color television show they were the only ones who actually owned a color television?

 

Ce4einBWAAAfJMz

 

Did you know…

The Egyptian hieroglyph for one hundred thousand is a tadpole?

Kind of makes you wonder what they were counting…

 

 

Did you know…

A snallygaster is a mythical dragon like beast that supposedly haunts rural Maryland?

And all this time I thought it was just David Hasslehoff.

 

hB70982ED

 

Did you know…

Lachanophobia is the fear of vegetables?

Like kale.

That shit is everywhere.

 

23091465fbd54438d625c7dd28b1dba0

 

Did you know…

Aztec emperor Montezuma had a nephew named Cuitlahac?

Roughly translated Cuitlahac means “plenty of excrement”.

Clearly Monty’s sister had a sense of humor.

 

 

Did you know…

In Japan, robots pay union dues.

Which answers the age old age question…

Who killed Jimmy Hoffa?