Tag Archives: education

You’re never too old to learn….. LEGOS.

 

Next up in my continuing series on  the absolutely crazy things people will pay money for  Maine Adult Education is…. LEGOS.

Yes, LEGOS.

Those annoying little plastic toy pieces we’ve all stepped on and paid the price.

 

 

And while there have been some other ridiculous classes…

 

You’re never too old to learn…. Spoons.

You’re never to old to learn…. Potatoes.

You’re never too old to learn…. Ukulele

You’re never too old to learn…. Chakra Toning.

You’re never too old to learn…. Mindfulness.

You’re never to old to learn…. Tin Cans.

You’re never too old to learn…. Knotweed Flutes.

You’re never too old to learn… Succulent Picture Frame.

 

This one, and it’s  how the hell can we make this nonsense sound like a legitimate college course  description really made me laugh.

 

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Oh, it’s a facilitated process?  Well, that explains everything.

And they use specially selected LEGO elements! Wow.

Does that mean the red ones… or the green?

The group discussion would be interesting to hear. Problem solving and decision making? Give me a break… exactly what wisdom will you gain?

 

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Okay, there’s that.

But hey, you’ll be utilizing kinesthetic skills and will be required to learn and listen.

This is Serious Play!

Taught by a Serious Play facilitator!

 

 

Of course when I was young, the people who took LEGOS seriously usually ended up like this….

 

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But maybe times have changed.

 

 

Did you know….

 

The name of the novel that inspired the film Blade Runner was Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?

I do because…..

 

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I find it rather disturbing.

As should you…

 

 

Did you know…

La Brea means The Tar?  So when you talk about ‘the La Brea Tar Pits’ in California you are actually saying The The Tar Tar Pits.

Talk about overkill.

 

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Did you know…

Hindu men once believed it was unlucky to marry a third time so they avoided misfortune by marrying a tree? It was then burned, freeing them up to marry again.

I imagine it went like this:

 

 

Did you know…

 

Did you know…

Due to a different gravitational force, if you weigh 200lbs on earth….. you would weigh 76 lbs on Mars?

Come on Elon.

Momma needs a  trip to Mars.

 

 

Yeah, you’ll need to put that down first.

 

Did you know….

An octopus’s testicles are located in it’s head?

He also can remove his spermatophore-loaded mating arm and give it to a female if she’s hungry and likely to eat him.

 

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I think this has to be a new series.

 

I read an article the other day that was so good it might need to become a blog series.

It’s about words.

 

 

Stop that.

It’s going to be great, I promise.

English is a funny language and apparently if it’s not your mother tongue, can be quite difficult to learn. So naturally it stands to reason there would be a large collection of foreign words with no direct English equivalent.

Let’s explore that.

 

  1. Kummerspeck (German)

Excess weight gained from emotional overeating.

Literally, grief bacon.

Grief bacon!

It’s official.

Kummerspeck is now my new favorite word.

 

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Do I like bacon?

 

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Indeed I do.

Do I care that it’s bad for you?

 

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No. I do not.

 

2. Mencolek (Indonesian)

The old trick where you tap someone lightly on the opposite shoulder from behind to fool them.

 

Where was this word when I was young?

I totally slayed  Mencolek in the 3rd grade.

 

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3. Seigneur-terraces (French)

Coffee shop dwellers who sit at tables a long time, but spend very little money.

 

Funny….

In English we just call them cheap.

 

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4. Slampadato (Italian)

Someone addicted to the UV glow of tanning salons.

I think we all know one of those.

 

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And finally..

5.  Pana Po’o (Hawaiian)

To scratch your head in order to help you remember something you’ve forgotten.

This is not a technique I’m familiar with, but then I’ve never been to Hawaii so what do I know?

 

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But to hell with remembering where the keys are …

This is pure brilliance.

Who knew?

 

I did,  because…

 

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Did you know…

The phrase “hands down”  (as in “He won that game hands down.”)  was first used in the 19th century to describe a horse racing victory? It signified the jockey was so far ahead he could drop the reins and relax his arms.

 

 

Well, not quite.

 

Did you know….

Bruno Mars played an Elvis impersonator as a child in the 1992 film Honeymoon in Vegas?

It’s true.

 

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Did you know….

Mosquito repellants do not repel, they hide.

The spray blocks a mosquito’s sensors so they don’t even know you’re there.

 

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Did you know…

During WWII, America tried to train bats to drop bombs.

Silly Americans, what were we thinking?

Bats won’t even play fetch.

 

 

 

Did you know….

The Roman emperor Caligula made his horse a Senator.

Maybe we should try this….

It can’t be any worse.

 

 

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Did you know…

The Bible has been translated into Klingon?

 

 

Well, you do now.

I bet you didn’t know….

 

Flying fish and Coo Coo is the national dish of Barbados.

 

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But I did, because….

 

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Did you know….

When CBS broadcast the first ever color television show they were the only ones who actually owned a color television?

 

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Did you know…

The Egyptian hieroglyph for one hundred thousand is a tadpole?

Kind of makes you wonder what they were counting…

 

 

Did you know…

A snallygaster is a mythical dragon like beast that supposedly haunts rural Maryland?

And all this time I thought it was just David Hasslehoff.

 

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Did you know…

Lachanophobia is the fear of vegetables?

Like kale.

That shit is everywhere.

 

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Did you know…

Aztec emperor Montezuma had a nephew named Cuitlahac?

Roughly translated Cuitlahac means “plenty of excrement”.

Clearly Monty’s sister had a sense of humor.

 

 

Did you know…

In Japan, robots pay union dues.

Which answers the age old age question…

Who killed Jimmy Hoffa?

 

You’re never too old to learn…. Knotweed Flutes.

 

It’s time for class!

 

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No worries, there won’t be a test.

Maine Adult Education offers endless opportunities to  shake your head and say WTF? enrich your mind. Last year there were some fascinating topics:

 

You’re never too old to learn…. Spoons.

You’re never to old to learn…. Potatoes.

You’re never too old to learn…. Ukulele

You’re never too old to learn…. Chakra Toning.

You’re never too old to learn…. Mindfulness.

 

And this year started off with a bang as well…

You’re never to old to learn…. Tin Cans.

 

Today’s selection from the  brochure of the bizarre  curriculum is:

 

weed

 

Yes, you too can have your very own flute made from a pesky weed in your backyard.

To hell with cutting it down…

 

 

Blow into it and start a band.

You’ll be the envy of your friends, I promise.

 

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And in case you’re unfamiliar…

Japanese Knotweed is a large, extremely invasive plant.

 

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                           actual photo of Japanese Knotweed swallowing small child

 

It’s almost impossible to get rid of once it takes hold, and ironically… cutting only spreads it.

There really is only one reliable course of action available.

 

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So why not take the class…

And make a flute before it swallows you whole?

 

knotweed

 

 

 

 

 

Let’s Talk Chicken … Chapter 3.

 

If you missed the first two chapters of this riveting chicken series, catch up here:

Let’s talk chicken…

Let’s Talk Chicken… chapter 2.

Onward.

 

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This could be a trick question as chickens often eat ticks, but we’ll proceed anyway.

 

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Let’s start with some interesting chicken facts.

 

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Quick recap – You can’t beat a chicken off the line unless it’s at night… and if it catches you? It will unleash it’s inner T Rex.

My advice?

Don’t race a chicken.

 

 

 

More facts:

 

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Quick recap – There’s no need to buy your chickens deodorant or a birthday cake.

Though wearing the hat can be quite stylish.

 

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A 3 eyed chicken?

 

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I’ve often thought having a third eye on the top of my head would be helpful, though it would be hard to find the right pair of sunglasses…

 

 

Next up –

 

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Okay, whether you’re a chicken fan or not this is fascinating stuff.

They can literally be asleep and awake at the same time. How frickin’ cool is that?

Heck, I could snooze and finish off that 12 part documentary series about Heinrich Schliemann at the same time!  (1)

 

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So there you have it.

Never let it be said my blogs are not educational…

 

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(1)   A few years ago I started watching a PBS documentary series on the search for ancient Troy.

Was it dry? Perhaps a wee bit…

Was it boring? Not to a history buff like me… but the husband fell asleep approximately 7 minutes into each and every episode.

If he was a chicken we could have discussed it later.