Tag Archives: learning

I think this has to be a new series.

 

I read an article the other day that was so good it might need to become a blog series.

It’s about words.

 

 

Stop that.

It’s going to be great, I promise.

English is a funny language and apparently if it’s not your mother tongue, can be quite difficult to learn. So naturally it stands to reason there would be a large collection of foreign words with no direct English equivalent.

Let’s explore that.

 

  1. Kummerspeck (German)

Excess weight gained from emotional overeating.

Literally, grief bacon.

Grief bacon!

It’s official.

Kummerspeck is now my new favorite word.

 

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Do I like bacon?

 

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Indeed I do.

Do I care that it’s bad for you?

 

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No. I do not.

 

2. Mencolek (Indonesian)

The old trick where you tap someone lightly on the opposite shoulder from behind to fool them.

 

Where was this word when I was young?

I totally slayed  Mencolek in the 3rd grade.

 

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3. Seigneur-terraces (French)

Coffee shop dwellers who sit at tables a long time, but spend very little money.

 

Funny….

In English we just call them cheap.

 

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4. Slampadato (Italian)

Someone addicted to the UV glow of tanning salons.

I think we all know one of those.

 

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And finally..

5.  Pana Po’o (Hawaiian)

To scratch your head in order to help you remember something you’ve forgotten.

This is not a technique I’m familiar with, but then I’ve never been to Hawaii so what do I know?

 

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But to hell with remembering where the keys are …

This is pure brilliance.

You’re never too old to learn… Succulent Picture Frame.

 

Gather round students…. the Maine  is this for real?  Adult Education classes continue.

If you live in Maine  you can learn some wonderful things. So far in this riveting series we’ve had:

 

You’re never too old to learn…. Spoons.

You’re never to old to learn…. Potatoes.

You’re never too old to learn…. Ukulele

You’re never too old to learn…. Chakra Toning.

You’re never too old to learn…. Mindfulness.

You’re never to old to learn…. Tin Cans.

You’re never too old to learn…. Knotweed Flutes.

 

And today we continue with Succulent Picture Frames.

(Disclaimer – This class does not require sucking. But I think that’s offered at PT’s Showclub in Portland.)

 

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Course description:

Succulent Picture Frame 

Having live plants around as we transition into fall will brighten every day and beautify your home. You will set up your own succulent picture frame with a variety of plants to create your own living art! You will also receive instruction on how to care for this gorgeous creation to enjoy it all year long. The price of the course includes all materials to make one succulent picture frame. Materials fee of $60 included in the price of the course. No discounts.

 

A frame. Made out of plants.

My first question is why?

Don’t get me wrong, I love plants… they’re beautiful and versatile.

 

 

As well as great disguises when you’re stalking an ex.

 

 

They can even rid your house of pesky flies… I get it.

 

 

Though we all know that can go horribly wrong…

 

 

But hell, I can hardly be bothered to dust my current picture frames, now they want me to water one?

No.

Because while I have lovely outdoor gardens, and a house full of healthy green leafy plants?

I will kill each and every succulent I touch.

 

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I must over water….. or love them too much.

Because yes, apparently that’s a thing.

 

 

So if I want my walls to be covered in framed plants?

 

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I’ll just dye my cobwebs green and call it good.

 

 

 

Who knew?

 

I did,  because…

 

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Did you know…

The phrase “hands down”  (as in “He won that game hands down.”)  was first used in the 19th century to describe a horse racing victory? It signified the jockey was so far ahead he could drop the reins and relax his arms.

 

 

Well, not quite.

 

Did you know….

Bruno Mars played an Elvis impersonator as a child in the 1992 film Honeymoon in Vegas?

It’s true.

 

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Did you know….

Mosquito repellants do not repel, they hide.

The spray blocks a mosquito’s sensors so they don’t even know you’re there.

 

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Did you know…

During WWII, America tried to train bats to drop bombs.

Silly Americans, what were we thinking?

Bats won’t even play fetch.

 

 

 

Did you know….

The Roman emperor Caligula made his horse a Senator.

Maybe we should try this….

It can’t be any worse.

 

 

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Did you know…

The Bible has been translated into Klingon?

 

 

Well, you do now.

Still drinking, still knowing…

 

Still have to share my ridiculously useless knowledge.

 

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Did you know….

 

1.   The little dot over a lower case  is called a tittle.

 

(There won’t be any memes to accompany that precious nugget of information.

Google image searching for the word “tittle” led me in some very disturbing directions.)

 

2.   An octopus will eat it’s own arms if it gets hungry enough.

But Hell….

I think we’ve all been tempted to do that at one time or another, no?

 

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3.  In 1900 the third leading cause of death was diarrhea.

Aren’t you glad you started reading this blog?

 

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4.  Winnie the Pooh was based on a real life female bear named Winnie who lived in the London Zoo.

 

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5.  The first known contraceptive was crocodile dung, used by the Egyptians in 2000 BCE.

 

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I don’t know about you, but crocodile dung would definitely be enough to kill the mood for me.

 

6.  Sigmund Freud had a morbid fear of ferns.

Really?

Orchids I could understand. They’re fussy, creepy, high maintenance flowers that look like they want to bite off your finger.

But ferns?

They’re delightful..

 

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7.   Buzz Aldrin’s mother’s maiden name was Moon.

How’s that for serendipity?

 

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8.  If you live in Michigan, it is illegal to put a skunk in your boss’s desk.

Sorry Detroiters…

I’m sure that’s very disappointing news.

 

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The greatest story ever… shown?

 

While I’ve been known to Bitmoji on occasion….

 

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And used to see the appeal of texting miniature versions of myself to friends…

 

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I read something this afternoon that made me do a double take.

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Yes.

There is now a Bitmoji Bible.

 

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“In the year of our Lord 2019, someone recreated the Bible through Bitmoji. The Bitmoji Bible is more of a collection of a handful of stories found in Jewish and Christian holy scriptures than an actual translation told exclusively through Bitmoji. While much of the actually philosophical passages aren’t included — how are you supposed to discuss promises of salvation through a few cartoon characters? — you might recognize more well known myths, like the story of David and Goliath. “ 

 

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Now I’m not a religious woman, and I admit to never having read the good book cover to cover…. but I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess David never said “Hey Boo” to the giant Philistine.

 

 

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And if there was a Garden of Eden?

I somehow doubt their trees were in pots.

 

 

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“Today’s children are more likely to read a text message than a book,” co-creator Daniel Eckler said through Twitter DM. “Given the Bible has been translated into more than 3000 languages, I thought it should be translated into one of the most popular contemporary languages.”

 

 

Jesus wept.

Repeat after me…

Bitmoji is not a contempary language, it’s a collection of bad cartoons.

 

 

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Quoting an excerpt from Genesis about the whole world speaking the same language, Eckler believes it’s “important to speak to people in their language.”

 

 

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So help me out here…
Is that Joseph?
And is he spitting his coffee out because Mary just told him about the immaculate conception?  

 

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He notes that his goal isn’t necessarily to evangelize, but rather to open the door to higher thinking for people who may not already be interested in it — he references biblical redemption themes in Star Wars and The Matrix. “Not to say they’re substitutes, but as long as people are seeking spiritual truths,” Eckler said. “I think they’ll find them where they find them.” 
Let me get this straight…. to understand Christianity I don’t have to read the bible.
I just have to sit through The Empire Strikes Back?
Well if that’s the case…

 

 

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I’m watching Game of Thrones instead.

 

 

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It has mythical beasts, devout believers and frowned upon sex as well.  
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You’re never too old to learn…. Mindfulness.

 

I was cleaning out my desk the other day and found an old brochure for Adult Education.

Then I remembered I’d started a series on some of the more interesting classes when I first started blogging here…

 

You’re never too old to learn…. Chakra Toning.

You’re never too old to learn…. Spoons.

You’re never too old to learn…. Ukulele

 

Yes, you can learn some weird things in Maine.

So let’s continue….

 

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Good.

I’m glad someone is.

Today’s class?

Mindfulness.

 

mindful

 

O-kay.

The definition?

1. the quality or state of being conscious

 

So let me get this straight…

For $95, and over the course of 6 weeks, they’re going to teach me to be conscious?

To be honest, that’s not usually something I have a problem with…. unless I’ve had too much to drink.

 

 

And as I read the class description I kept picturing this:

 

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But for the hell of it, I tried practicing being in the moment…

And it didn’t seem too difficult.

 

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And I figured…

I got this.

Who needs a class?

 

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Yeah.

It didn’t work.

But that’s okay, I’d much rather buy $95 worth of Girl Scout Cookies anyway…..

I bought a book.

 

No, that isn’t news.

I’m an avid reader and am probably personally responsible for Jeff Bezos’s ranking on the Fortune 500.

 

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But this book was special.

 

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As you may know, I have a fondness for chickens.

It started years ago when our farming neighbor moved in across the street and asked us to baby chicken sit.

Matter of fact, here’s a picture of the husband trying to speak to those first chickens.

 

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As you can see, it didn’t go well. The chickens weren’t paying attention.

Were his conversational skills severely lacking…

Or did he just not speak their language?

The chickens might have been saying all kinds of fascinating things!

 

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Or not.

The point is we didn’t know.

And as the flocks grew larger…

 

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We made friends…

 

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But the language barrier was problematic.

My pathetic attempts at cooing were for naught.

 

 

Clearly the birds had something to say.

Possibly deep, philosophical things….

 

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But we couldn’t decipher it.

Until now.

 

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So join me on the journey.

 

 

And we’ll explore these topics.

 

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Admit it.

There have been times you’ve wanted to chat up a chicken too.

 

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It will be fun…

 

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