So very disappointing.


I love it when I go grocery shopping and find a product that seems to be tailor made for me.

Witness River’s cookie heaven:





That taste like cocktails!



I was a little disappointed to find there was a bag inside the bag and how very few cookies there actually were….




But I figured that just meant they were extra special.

I was wrong.

So very, very wrong.



In fact…  these cookies were not only horrible, but probably one of the worst things I’ve ever tasted in my life.  And I’ve endured my MIL’s pot roast, so that’s saying something.

I mean Hell… it’s a cookie. By nature they’re flippin’ delightful!

How do you screw that up?

As I was bundling them up to throw away, I flipped over the package and noticed this:





This company shipped 12,000 pounds of the most atrocious baked good ever invented to brave, battle weary soldiers.



I know!

Hadn’t those poor men suffered enough?

Of course it does explain the low quality cookie standard and my severe revulsion to their product.






Maybe that’s the explanation.

The cookies were actually leftover fruitcake from 1943.



49 thoughts on “So very disappointing.”

  1. The naming might have been based on the cocktails that the people baking the the cookies drank as they baked. But fossilized fruit cake theory wins hands down.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. You’d have to be drunk to serve those abominations to people. And heck, in a pinch….. they could have used those fruitcakes in place of bombs. 12,000 lbs of it could level a small city.


  2. To me, there is nothing like a Lofthouse cookie. I don’t buy them. Because I will sit down and eat all dozen cookies in one sitting.

    And no, I no longer wonder why my weight is off.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Ok, don’t pelt me with bits of hardened fruitcake cookies but, I happen to like fruitcake. Not the commercially made fruitcake but my mom makes actual fruitcake cookies for Christmas and I love those. They don’t weigh a ton and are actually edible and are pretty delicious. There aren’t any fruitcakes made commercially I don’t despise, and cocktail flavored cookies seem a bit suspicious to me, lol.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. You like fruitcake.
      How is this possible?
      But if they’re cookies, technically they’re not really fruitcake. Just cookies with fruit. And if they don’t weigh 20 lbs per? Definitely not fruitcake.
      Whew. You scared me for a moment there…

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I love English fruitcake. It’s nothing like the lurid day glo shat people call fruitcake here. I soak the fruit in booze for 48 hours when I make it and then ‘feed’ it with more brandy or whisky after it’s made. I feel sorry for Americans who grew up with the truly horrid fruitcake you get here, it’s ghastly

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’ve never met a fruitcake I could tolerate, much less enjoy. And the funny part is, everyone says, “Oh, MY fruitcake is different, You’ll LOVE mine.” No, I won’t. Please stop trying.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I don’t try to share lol! I just make one big enough for me!
        I know what you mean though. I won’t eat anyone else’s lasagne because they sneak nasty shit in and say ‘oh but you’ll like it when I make it’
        No Karen. I won’t. Naff Off!

        Liked by 2 people

  5. River,
    I’ve never eaten fruitcake and not expect I’ll ever try. I’ll add your aforenamed cookies to the list. You’ve provided a very important public service announcement today — and we thank you for it! Mona

    Liked by 2 people

  6. I just want to say my mother is always baking “good for you” cookies WHICH ARE NOT COOKIES, and the woman loves fruitcake. I think there may be a correlation.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Honestly, it’s her one fault as a mother and grandmother. She’s always trying to hide flax and other bird food in sugarless circles of fiber. She redeems herself by making candy each December. Candy WITH sugar, thank tacos.

        Liked by 1 person

  7. I never would have gotten as far as the first bag much less the bag inside a bag. There must be some form of chocolate involved for me to get interested in a cookie.

    Liked by 1 person

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