Things Facebook thinks I need.

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Facebook… in its infinite wisdom… has posted yet another list of ridiculous products it thinks I must buy, and this time? They’ve outdone themselves.

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Do I need to remotely drive a pile of poo?

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I most assuredly do not.

Am I ancient enough to require a ladder’s assistance to sit up in bed?

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Not quite yet.

And while a recipe book of quick cook meals does have a certain appeal…

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I doubt I need a potty mouthed granny to deliver them.

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14 thoughts on “Things Facebook thinks I need.”

  1. The RC turd/fart dispenser could keep your cat busy for a long time. So what if your friends think you’re juvenile? Mine already know.
    While we’re on the topic, if you can’t sit up in bed, what you need is a flatulent bedfellow. A little motivation goes a long way.
    Granny PottyMouth’s cookbook? Shit. If Betty White wrote this motherfucker it would be a goddam international bestseller, translated into twenty different sumbitchin’ languages. Is there a word in Pashto for “Shake and Bake pork chops”? Who fuckin’ cares? I’m getting a copy, I’ll let you know how it is.
    Such a lovely post, joyful and uplifting, I can always count on you for that.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I thought about this for far longer than I should, but it wasn’t in vain. The smart money would bet the farm that there is no Pashto word for Shake and bake pork chops. It just doesn’t come up that often. That’s better, now I can go to sleep. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

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