Tag Archives: marketing

Right and wrong.

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Most of the time my Facebook ads get it wrong.

I don’t need ball wash soap or help with a bigger orgasm. I also don’t need ball hammock underwear, yet the hits just keep on coming. The latest is Halloween themed… and so very, very wrong.

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Do I need to see Frankenstein gettin’ his freak on? I most certainly do not.

But every once in a while, the algorithm hits a bit closer to the mark.

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And horrible grammatical translation aside, at least this one includes alcohol….with undertones of barn bar which we all know is near and dear to my heart.

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I love bad translations.

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I’m sorry, but this ad made me laugh.

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The kissy face emojis are a little over the top, but whatever.

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So much to unpack here.

Exclusive female happiness? Sorry fellas, I think you’re redundant.

An orgasm that can provide 3-5 days to the world? Now that’s an impressive O.

Long standby. Does that means it hovers in the corner waiting until it’s needed again? A bit creepy, but okay.

And finally, We rest 50% today… that baby must provide one heck of a workout.

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Things I won’t be buying today.

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Do I need to research Lord Dudley Mountcatten’s family tree?

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I do not. But kudos to the marketing genius who came up with this. I’m sure they’re making a fortune.

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I do happen to be a Rolling Stones fan, RIP Charlie Watts, but that’s a big no on the lips and tongue bottle of whiskey.

And on further examination? It’s a good thing I don’t want to add one to the man cave bar.

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65,000 euro? Holy guacamole Batman… that’s a seriously pricey sip!

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Weird things you might need.

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I don’t need this…

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But I won’t judge you if it’s something you want to try.

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Who am I kidding? That sounds disgusting. And don’t even think about wiping your hands on my guest towels after you apply it.

I will hurt you.

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Good grief. Along with all the other parts of my body that are sagging…. now I have to worry about droopy gums?

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Does lip temperature change?

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Mood lipstick of the 90’s? Hell… I’m old enough to remember mood rings from the 70’s.

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Who needs these things?

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I certainly don’t, but maybe some of you might…

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Who’s going to order these? Fess up, I know someone will.

But please, don’t post pictures.

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I love a good roast beef sandwich as much as the next girl…. but soaking in beef juice bubbles? Hard pass.

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I don’t wish I could wear those outside. Nope. Not one little bit.

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If you’re that one friend? Please unfollow me immediately.

*gag*

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Do you need one of these?

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Because I know I don’t.

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Lately the man cave/Barn Mahal has been our money sucking box….

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But I agree, that one is much creepier.

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Okay, I admit a yodeling pickle might be a nice screaming goat accompaniment at our bar… but I restrained myself from ordering one.

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Yeah. I can do without that as well.

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Sorry, but there’s not a board game on earth that would make me want to eat my husband’s Uncle Donny.

Nope.

Not happening.

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Stupid cat products.

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It seems there’s no end to the ridiculous things you can buy for your pet.

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A privacy screen?

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Cats are a lot of things… smart, manipulative, stealthy, lovable. But the one thing they’re not? Easily embarrassed by bodily functions.

Does Lord Dudley Mountcatten need a privacy screen to hide behind while doing his business?

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You be the judge.

Cats. They have no shame.

Moving on….

Lots of people tell me I need to add perches to my windows… and while that might seem like a good idea?

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Over the kitchen sink has got to be the stupidest placement ever.

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This next product must have been invented by a moron. Seriously….

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If I left that on the counter? His Lordship would be sliding those levers to the left every chance he got.

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