Tag Archives: facebook

I love my town….

 

And their slightly off balance Facebook page.

 

 

 

Not off hand, no.

But I hope he finds one. Pigless is a terrible thing to be.

 

 

 

This picture of our local sheriff’s truck was posted by a resident.

Because really, who needs blue lights when you have a chicken?

 

 

 

 

This post was met with the incredulity and the scathing derision it deserved . Reveal your fiddlehead location? To a stranger!!

Mainers have been killed for less.

Fiddleheads are a precious ($15-$20 per pound) and extremely fleeting commodity in the spring. Locals protect their secret gathering spots like they do their virgin daughters. Personally I can’t stand the slimy things…

 

 

 

But Mainers go berserk for them.

And speaking of barely edible food, some well meaning townie posted this:

 

 

 

Now really, if I’m not going to eat the delicate unfurled leaves of a fern?

You can damn sure bet I’m not baking helicopter seed pods that look like bugs.

Damn.

Ars Gratia Artis.

 

Art for Art’s Sake.

Noble words, but do they apply to off color road graffiti?

Let’s ask the woman in my town who discovered a piece of art and posted it on Facebook….

 

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Well, yes.

That is a rather large  skin flute, dipstick, tallywacker, schlong,  piece of art.

And apologies for the photo censorship, it wasn’t me.

I’d never deface someone’s  Johnson, knob, love muscle, trouser monkey,  creative expression that way.

I did however get a kick out of the comments on this post.

 

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Of course.

That’s what I thought when I first saw it as well.

 

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I’d always been told size doesn’t matter.

Clearly,  that was wrong.

 

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Butterfly?

That’s sweet, if mildly disturbing.

 

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And yes, considering the size and scope of it?

That’s probably sound advice.

 

 

 

I don’t want to talk about it.

 

Politics.

I think we’ve established the fact that my husband will debate a tree stump….. which is probably why he goes to breakfast every Saturday with a group of local men who hold completely opposite views and harangue him as the odd man out over platters of scrambled eggs. He comes home sputtering and waving his arms…. expecting me to join in the discussion.

My reaction?

 

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Thing is, I’ve always had friends from both sides of the aisles… and to be honest? For many years I neither knew nor cared how they voted or what their political opinions were.

But in today’s toxic world of Facebook and Twitter vitriol… this is impossible.

I now know how all my friends feel…. and how they want me to feel…. and how stupid they think I am if I don’t feel the same way.

It’s getting old.

The culture of division…. of red vs blue, right vs left, east vs west, ad nauseam… will ruin us. We’re one country and we’d better learn to find our commonality.

Like the Coronavirus.

It doesn’t care who you voted for. It will infect you no matter which side of the gun control argument you’re on.

That being said?

Here’s my solution:

 

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I don’t want to argue politics.

Cheers!

 

 

 

I love my town…. Part 7.

 

It’s time to take a look at my local Facebook page again.

And when I did, I realized how critter-centric it’s been lately.

 

 

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Goats were on the loose again.

 

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And apparently craving pumpkin pie.

 

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This was a bit disturbing.

It’s not often someone is actively seeking deer guts, even around here.

 

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Makes you wonder what this poor guy did.

“…for whatever purpose you would like.” probably doesn’t bode well for that bird.

 

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And speaking of Sunday dinner –

 

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As much as I’d like to come home to a nice meal, the thought of letting a stranger into my kitchen to cook seems a bit odd.

They might find that fuzzy, 11 month old spear of asparagus that got pushed to the back of the fridge… and that’s bound to be embarrassing.

And lastly, there was some news on the crime beat.

 

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Duck theft.

Because sometimes people can’t help themselves.

 

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I love my town…. Part 6.

 

Time for an update on the stories making the news on my town’s Facebook page.

Traffic jams are awful, no two ways about it…..

But in my town?

 

 

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They’re not always bumper to bumper.

 

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And then there was this:

 

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No, damn it! I did not.

We’ve lived here over 17 years and the only moose I’ve seen was a dead one on I-95.

Trotting right down Main Street?

 

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Another missed opportunity.

And finally, there was this:

 

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My first thought was the zombie fish apocalypse had begun… and I started to get a little nervous.

But it turns out a bald eagle was fishing the river, dropped his sturgeon while flying and decided to munch on it in situ.

 

 

Because the thought of zombie fish taking over my blog?

Not cool.