News you can’t use.

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Like news you can use, but worse.

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I’m afraid to ask which organ is electric.

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That doctor can bite me.

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Not dying at 45 is isn’t a valid reason to be happy about menopause. It’s not even close.

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Wow. Talk about unnecessary surgery.

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Admit it, you all have that one child you wish you could give back and try again.

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I don’t know what that is.

And I don’t want to know either…

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Animals are evolving into crabs? I missed this headline and will be keeping a closer eye on our cat from now on.

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Freaky?

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For a Kardashian, it’s just another Monday. .

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A very depressing clock.

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Have you ever wondered how long you’ll live?

My mother was 10 days away from her 91rst birthday when she passed, my father didn’t see 69.

I’ve often said I wouldn’t want to know the breadth of my mortality, that particular clock ticks silently for us all…. but when a fellow blogger posted a link that promised to give me the exact day of my death?

I couldn’t resist.

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Sweet!

I’ll beat my mother’s record…

And 11,153 days might just be long enough for me to clean out my husband’s cellar full of crap.

If you’re curious, give it a whirl and post your results.

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https://www.death-clock.org/

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Let’s play.

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Or don’t, it’s entirely up to you.

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I could say “you” but Mariah Carey already did and continues to do so entirely too much this time of year.

I used to be crazy for Christmas. I’d decorate everything that stood still.

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Yes, even the Barn Mahal.

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I shopped till I dropped searching for the perfect gifts. I’d spend a fortune on fancy wrapping paper and sparkling ribbons and give you something that was almost too pretty to open. I’d send 150 handwritten festive cards and host elaborate meals. Our tree was a magnificent thing to behold… always freshly cut, twinkling with alternating strands of red, green and white lights and festooned with gorgeous ornaments.

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Even the cats were impressed.

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There were carols playing, sweet baked treats on the table, mistletoe over the doorway, and I enjoyed every single thing about it.

Until I didn’t.

Until the beloved family members who shared my joy passed, one by one by one.

Until it all seemed like a terrible waste of money. And time. And effort.

My husband was raised poor, one of nine children for whom Christmas meant work and hand me downs. He always went along with my Xmas mania but never really felt it… so why was I bothering?

In 2015, a year after my mother died, I simply quit.

No tree, no gifts, no meals. I cut my card list back by 2/3rds, put some wreaths on the windows and called it good. We took a trip to the Pocono mountains to escape and enjoyed a stress free week that would become our new tradition. We’ve travelled every year since and never looked back with regret. The memories are gift enough.

In answer to the question, I don’t need anything and I don’t want anything. We have too much “stuff” already. What I want is what I already have, a nice home, a nice cat and the wonderful man I’ve shared my life with for the past 40 years.

Do I miss the big bright Christmases?

Sometimes, yes. But not enough to resurrect them.

That’s my slightly depressing story. So…

What do you want for Christmas?

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Beer crawl… #2

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Heading south across the border into New Hampshire, we discovered a fabulous brewpub.

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Housed in an industrial complex, it had a funky urban vibe.

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The mural was awesome and took time to appreciate…

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So we grabbed a seat at the bar and checked the nicely varied tap list.

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Stone face doesn’t do flights per se, but you can order small pours to sample.

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Thoroughly enjoying their brews we chose a few full glasses and an order of their amazing garlic Parmesan wings.

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Tasty beer aside, I’d drive down just for these.

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There’s a large glass wall behind the bar that allows you to watch the brewery operation, but I was more taken with the fancy glass cleaner on the shelf.

The man cave could definitely use one of those.

😉

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Beer crawl… #1

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So much beer, so little time.

The husband and I like craft breweries and since our state seems to have one on every corner, we’ve made it our life’s work to try them all.

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This satellite location of the popular Definitive brand in Kittery left us a bit underwhelmed.

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And after doing a flight of four mediocre brews including a dishwater Helles and two strange milky sours…

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There wasn’t much to keep us from moving on.

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Atmosphere and a friendly bartender are important to my husband…

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Sadly this brewery had neither.

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Death and taxes.

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Neither can be avoided, though I’ve done a good job dodging the first so far. Unfortunately the latter keeps clawing its way into my checkbook like the greedy bastard it is.

Last year our property taxes went up $1,200. This year? Another $1,400. WTH!

I live in a small rural town that has no police force, or ambulance, a completely volunteer fire department and a consolidated school system that shares costs with 3 other towns.

WTH are we paying for?

Our home is a comfortable 2,000 square feet with a little over 3 acres. But we don’t have a pool, a guest house or a professional chef’s kitchen.. so what gives?

I know everything goes up, but $2,600 in two years seems a bit extreme. And the worst part? The assessor hasn’t reached our area yet and doesn’t know the barn is now a fully insulated and heated man cave.

And if I have my way?

He never will.

🥴