Category Archives: Uncategorized

Uncategorized

We must have made them look bad.

10 Comments

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As you know we have a beautifully smooth new driveway. It’s dark black and lovely… as it should be for $20,000… but I think we were making the road in front of our house look bad.

That’s the only explanation I can come up with for this..

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A paving crew….

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Redoing a ten mile stretch of road to match our driveway.

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This pleases the color coordinator in me greatly.

Our vehicles suspensions are saying thank you as well since Maine pot holes are epic and can swallow you whole.

As can our hideous new ditch shown here with uncoordinated grass.

🥴

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Uncategorized

More (not really) helpful survival tips.

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A few more tips that are weird enough to share.

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Well damn. That blows the veracity of every cartoon I watched as a kid right out of the water.

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Okay, that’s a pretty handy tip if it works…. but am I the only one who substituted the word kindling for kindle every time they read it? Kindling is a noun, kindle is a verb. Unless they plan on setting their ereaders on fire… this is grammatically incorrect.

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You know I’m going to try this, but since everyone’s hands are different sizes I may have more daylight left than you. Neener neener.

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Yes. Because everyone has a termite mound in their backyard …

🥴

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Uncategorized

When you really love your mouse.

26 Comments

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Lord Dudley Mountcatten has been spending a lot of time in our bedroom since our contractor has been working in the living room. And if he’s in there?

So is his favorite mouse.

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How much does he love this particular rodent?

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Enough to pick it up and carry it to bed with him.

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And don’t even think about removing said mouse.

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Unless you want to lose a finger.

😉

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Uncategorized

The… but it has nowhere to go so that’s a half assed solution…. project.

28 Comments

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Remember the river I blogged about a while back? The one that runs between our house and garage every time we have heavy rain?

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The one I’m blaming on our new and pretty, but clearly sloping the wrong way driveway?

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Well, our contractor came up with an idea to fix the problem and offered to implement the plan…. which led to this.

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My thrifty husband wanting to save money and doing it himself.

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I was thrilled with the idea of sinking a catch basin and perforated drainage line to direct the water to flow elsewhere.

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Except my spouse…king of the half assed, why bother doing it correctly the first time if you can save on labor projects… had another idea.

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Oh, he sunk the catch basin.

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And screwed the cover on.

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But decided this was enough and no drainage lines were necessary.

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So now we have a catch basin with nowhere for the water to go.

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Yes, he put it in the right spot where water collects… as shown by the morning after a heavy rain.

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But as soon as the basin fills up no further drainage is achieved and we still have standing water.

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Sigh…

🥴

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Uncategorized

Beam/ceiling repair day 8…. mud and sand.

18 Comments

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Now that we’re in the drywall phase, the ceiling repair project’s daily progress has slowed considerably.

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Mud. Let dry. Sand until the entire house is covered in white dust even though there’s a plastic barrier.

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Repeat.

Our poor contractor works all day and I swear it looks the same in the evening as it did when he arrived in the morning.

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But at least it won’t sag.

Wish my body came with a tag like that.

This afternoon two gallons of primer were applied and at least things are starting to look better.

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It’s been a week and a half of discombobulation and I have to admit I’m ready for this to be done.

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Uncategorized

News you can’t use.

29 Comments

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And if you can? Then bully for you…

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What’s that old saying? You never know what you miss till it’s gone….

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WTH Canada? I thought you were our nice neighbors to the north.

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Just… wow. More vomit bags is not suitable compensation. Nope. Uh uh.

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Yes. It’s not because I’m lazy and don’t want to tackle that mountain of laundry. It’s genetic.

👍

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I have a lot of ideas on this topic. Too much screen time, junk television, the quality of our leadership, social media … but turns out it’s just collective intelligence. We don’t need to know everything, we can just ask someone else.

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Uncategorized

Adaptation, thy name is cat.

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While His Lordship has fully embraced the temporary plastic room our repair project requires, he has been less than pleased with furniture being moved around and the disruption to his sleeping schedule.

The living room footstool has long been a favorite afternoon napping spot, and though it’s taken a while… Lord Dudley Mountcatten has adapted.

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Upside down and on top of a couch?

No problem.

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He even brought his catnip mice for company.

Of course having the couches up against the kitchen wall comes with it’s own challenges…

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As I discovered the other day when I was reading in the living room and heard slurping. Following the noise, I found His Lordship licking two prime filet mignons I was thawing on the counter. He could do this thanks to the back of a couch being perfectly aligned with the kitchen wall opening.

Scolding and chasing him off seems to have had no effect judging from his interest in my soon to be creamy chicken and wild rice soup.

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Perfect alignment has its price.

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🥴

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Uncategorized

A funny flashback.

18 Comments

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I had to laugh at my Facebook page’s memory section today.

It was a post I had written after I had my full abdominal hysterectomy in 2015. And though I’m laughing now it was anything but funny at the time.

For those of you who have been through it, laugh along with me.

For those of you who might have it in your future, I’m sorry.

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The 5 things you learn after abdominal surgery… whether you want to or not:

  1. Seatbelts are not your friend. They are medieval torture devices designed to make you gasp in pain everytime they tighten over your midsection.
  2. You will have hairy legs for the first week following surgery. The resulting pain from bending over to shave them is not worth it… trust me on this.
  3. Those awful grey stretch pants you previously never went out of the house in are now your go to outfit for the rare excursions you take to town. The mere thought of stuffing your swollen muffin top belly into anything tighter makes you break out in hives.
  4. You become adept at picking up things with your feet, rather like a chimpanzee. Who knew you were so talented?
  5. You anxiously await the day you can once again mow the lawn, stay up past 8:00pm and sleep on your stomach without cringing. (Okay, maybe not having to mow the lawn
    hasn’t been that awful, but you know what I mean.

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🤣

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Uncategorized

(Not always) helpful survival tips.

18 Comments

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I saw a list of what were supposed to be helpful survival tips online the other day and after reading the first few… I knew I had to share.

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Now call me crazy, but I never thought doing a striptease would be the first line of defense for any dangerous situation no less being chased by a giant bear in the Arctic.

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How bizarre. Do electrical fires really smell like fried haddock?

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Right.

Chased by a polar bear – clothes off.

And after you have hypothermia from out running a polar bear in the nude – – clothes on.

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And me with no coloring books or crayons. Damn.

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This last one was an ad on the page, and if you want to pee faster and stronger? Sorry, you’re on your own. I know better than to click. .

😉

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Uncategorized

At least someone is enjoying the nightmare.

18 Comments

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This beam and ceiling repair project has been disruptive to say the least. We’ve lost our living room, our dining room, egress to the back deck and most importantly… the large television my husband is utterly devoted to watching. Sawdust, wood chips and dry wall fragments have been flying and I can’t even imagine the mess I’ll have to clean up when it’s finished.

I hate to say it…. but moving probably would have been easier.

Though while the husband and I have been inconvenienced, there’s one member of our family who seems to be having fun.

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You can see his ghostly reflection on the floor in the middle of that photo.

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Lord Dudley Mountcatten, who is not supposed to be walking around in the plastic room… is constantly found doing just that.

And even when I don’t physically catch him in there?

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I find evidence of his presence.

Unless our contractor has a thing for catnip mice, which is another blog topic entirely.

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His Lordship seems to think the plastic walls have been erected exclusively for his playing pleasure and has a habit of pulling the sheets from their corners and making entrance holes.

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Look at him.

The very picture of innocence…

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But not for long.

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Cats.

They will not be denied…

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