Tag Archives: headlines

Uncategorized

News you can’t use.

26 Comments

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And if you can use it?

I’d rather not know…

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I heartily disagree with this statement.

Someone has to drive after cocktail hour and it’s not going to be me.

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Take that Jello!

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I think the answer to this question is directly related to how much weed you’ve smoked yourself.

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Because Covid wasn’t annoying enough, let’s reawaken some Cretaceous plague. What could go wrong?

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Scotland has 790 islands.

I think this is a no brainer.

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I’m not a Swiftie, but come on people.

Chill.

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You can’t blame the guy. If anything is going to make me nauseated these days, it’s politics.

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Uncategorized

News you can’t use.

26 Comments

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Because the world is full of useless news.

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Thinking about this, I’m not sure I can get past the short term injuries.

🤢

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Post Traumatic Sh*t Disorder, no doubt.

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This handsome fellow ate $4,000 off the kitchen counter.

Bad dog. Bad.

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That’s a little extreme. Even for the journal…

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I’m sure they meant to say incorrectly, but never mind.

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Risk management aside, who in their right mind belongs to a Bladder and Bowel Community… and what would you bring to that potluck supper?

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Uncategorized

News you can’t use.

18 Comments

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Never useful, but hopefully entertaining.

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Trying to process a quickie divorce is my guess.

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I was disheartened to learn this was happening in Portland, Oregon instead of Portland, Maine. I could definitely use a little llama lovin’ when I fly.

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If it’s considered humane for Fido… why not for Florence?

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It’s not like they’d ever run out.

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Damn. That’s a lot of poo.

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Florida.

Nothing surprises me about that state anymore.

🤣

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Uncategorized

News you can’t use.

21 Comments

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Let’s begin…

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Holy Hell. Two uteruses? I had enough trouble with one…

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I’ve never had a problem with this, but okay.

For those of you who have time constraints, the trick is to store them upside down.

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I’ve often said I’d like to sleep for 5 months and lose 50lbs. That’s my kind of diet.

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Nuclear mutant Chernobyl dogs. What could go wrong…

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This half of a 16 year age gap couple who have been married for 40 years says it works just fine.

😉

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Uncategorized

News you can’t use.

16 Comments

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Still here, still reporting on the absurd.

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Kudos to the wedding photographer who caught the exact moment. That’s money well spent.

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Mom voice.

Once heard, never forgotten.

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I’ve had friends with allergies who were allergic to things that are hard to avoid…. grass, dust, animal dander… but being allergic to yourself? Hard to avoid that trigger.

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In my experience using a shot glass makes everything easier.

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Oh, sure.

That too.

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This is the best thing I’ve seen all week.

🤣

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Uncategorized

News you can’t use.

14 Comments

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New year? New ridiculous news…

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This takes the phrase “piss on it” to a whole new level.

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*Note to self – cross Baltimore off vacation destination list. *

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I never actually wanted to live to 150, but damn it… knowing I could have really ticks me off.

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Not many T Rexes walking around today so I guess we showed them.

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This explains so much!

All our renovation disasters. I don’t need a contractor.. I need an exorcist!

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Uncategorized

News you can’t use.

32 Comments

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You know I’m never going to run out of these.

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Just when you think things can’t get any more ridiculous….

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They do.

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And speaking of nipples….

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Jesus wept.

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Humans aren’t a very bright species. Id say that’s proof..

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Call me crazy, but if you’re living somewhere illegally? It’s probably not a great idea to call this much attention to yourself.

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