Tag Archives: humor

It’s nice to see good customer service still exists.

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Having nothing better to do last weekend we decided to take a drive down the coast and try another Batson River drinking establishment.

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Until a snow squall moved in out of nowhere and we opted for a late lunch closer to home.

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Tuscan Brick Oven Bistro has served us well in the past, so we headed there.

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As did everyone else because my husband’s beloved bar was full, as were all the tables.

Thankfully a young couple was vacating a bar adjacent high top and offered it to us… because clearly we looked thirsty and pathetic.

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I was thrilled to see the seasonal Apple of My Eye had returned ….

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And promptly drank two.

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My crab cakes were tiny but tasty but my husband complained his meatballs were “different”.

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I blacked out their faces, but here’s a modern family of three… every one of them on their phone and oblivious to the others presence. Ah, technology… thou art a heartless bitch.

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My chicken Marsala with homemade pasta and pancetta was flavorful if a bit thin on sauce.

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But my husband … who was already upset with his meatballs… said his shrimp scampi was “different” as well. When I asked him to clarify, all I got was “different”.

Since he clearly wasn’t interested in eating his meal, I called the waitress over who then brought the manager. He was a lovely young man who immediately removed the offending shrimp, promised to delete it from the bill and offered substitutions.

After talking with the guy for over a half an hour… sigh… husband chose a bowl of haddock chowder, which I thought was an odd choice for an Italian restaurant.

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But ooh la la! It was thick, creamy heaven in a bowl. Full of fish and fresh herbs and damn near perfect.

Too full for dessert we asked for the bill… and were pleased to see good customer service is alive and well in Freeport, Maine.

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The scampi charge was removed, and the chowder was free.

That’s one way to keep repeat customers happy.

👍

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Goldilocks strikes again.

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I’ve discovered shopping for dining room furniture with my husband isn’t any easier than shopping for living rooms. Don’t let anyone tell you women are hard to please…

Our current dining set is a 40 year old Queen Anne style table, chairs and china hutch and though it’s served us well… it’s time for a change to something more casual.

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I liked this one… but my husband didn’t like the table legs.

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I liked this one…. but my husband didn’t like the chairs.

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I liked this one…. but my husband didn’t like the pedestal base.

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To be honest, he was more interested in figuring out this kitchen island we didn’t need.

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It had a hole in the middle of the chopping block for scraps and he couldn’t figure out how you’d empty it.

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Until I pulled open the drawer on the other side.

The search continues….

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I call book foul.

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My first year of using the Goodreads app is through and I have to say I enjoyed the experience.

I’ve always been a voracious and fast reader but never actually tracked the amount of books I fly through annually.

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To say I was surprised at the number of books I read last year is an understatement.

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Now I know why my Amazon bill is so high.

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Good thing I buy as many as I can at thrift stores and library sales.

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But here’s my gripe… I joined their yearly reading challenge and set a goal of how many books I would read last year. I guessed 75, which as it turns out was ridiculously low. I finished 193, which if I do say so myself is pretty impressive.

It’s slightly more than a book every other day which proves I love to read… (and apparently don’t have a life).

So how in the world can anyone read more than that… and why am I only in the top 25%?

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Are there people who read two books a day? And how many do you have to read to teach the top ten…

I call foul.

😉

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Hello beautiful…

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A Coopers Hawk has discovered our bird feeding station.

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And while I haven’t seen the telltale sign of feathers on the ground…

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It’s only a matter of time before some poor slow moving dove succumbs.

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Birds of prey are glorious creatures and though witnessing an innocent death is never easy, it’s most definitely part of nature’s plan.

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Not the most riveting video, but I’m sharing anyway.

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As you can see we have no snow, but the wind was blowing and the hawk was puffed up against the cold.

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This next photo?

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Mid poop.

🤣

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Hawk visitors.

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Another reason I love living in the country.

❤️

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Let’s play.

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Yes, it’s a new year.

And yes, we’re still doing this…

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I must have been 3 1/2 because I was born in December and started nursery school early.

I remember all the children had to bring in something to sleep on for nap time. And while the other kids were given a pillow or blanket from home…my mother, being the uber mom she was…. went to FAO Schwartz and purchased a fantastically plush Humpty Dumpty egg shaped rug. It was perfect and I loved it.

I have vague memories of the other children being jealous and trying to take it from me on repeated occasions. Being a shy child, they often succeeded which resulted in my tear stained face and the teacher asking my mother to give me something less grand and envy provoking.

Which now that I think about it was a pretty lousy lesson. How about teaching my thieving little classmates to respect other people’s property instead.

🤣

Now you….

What’s your earliest memory?

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Some strange things are happening at Casa River..

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*Cue the Twilight Zone music*

This post may be a little woo woo for some of my readers and that’s fine. I’m a very grounded skeptic at heart and I swear if these things didn’t happen to me I wouldn’t believe them either.

If you’re a long time reader you’ll remember I wrote about the bizarre things that transpired during my mother’s last days in hospice. I can’t explain any of them, but I was there. They happened.

I’m an only child and my father died when I was young. My mother and I were close. She was a very spiritual woman and believed in a lot of things I don’t. Her death in 2014 hit me hard and deciding what to do with her ashes took me a few months. After burying half of them with a memorial tree on our property, I decided to take the other half back to the Jersey shore where we spent countless happy hours as a family.

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She adored the ocean.

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It was an emotional journey returning to the place she loved and saying goodbye.

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But I felt her with me and knew she’d approve.

I was a bit of a wreck that day, drained and raw. So when we returned to our hotel all I wanted to do was crawl in bed for a nap… but then I saw this on the counter.

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A white bobby pin that wasn’t there when we left. The same type of white bobby pin my mother used every day. The ones I had to special order at a beauty supply shop because no one carried them. The ones my mother would obsess over if she didn’t have enough.

I don’t use white bobby pins.

I certainly didn’t bring one with me to New Jersey.

No, the maid hadn’t cleaned our room while we were gone and left one. I checked.

Scoff all you like, but I know it was my mother’s way of telling me she was okay with my decision.

For the last 9 years that bobby pin has been a talisman and has lived on the bureau in my bedroom where I carefully dust around it. Until the other day… when I had just finished reading a book about a girl who lost her mother and believed she could communicate with her from beyond the grave.

I finished the book, went into our bedroom and it was gone. I looked everywhere. Under and behind the bureau, in all the drawers, behind my jewelry box and perfume tray. My husband didn’t take it. No one else was in the house. Lord Dudley doesn’t jump on the bureau but on the off chance he had, I scoured the room, searched in every corner and under the bed. I even emptied the vacuum cleaner. Nothing.

Just… gone. There that morning, gone in the afternoon, and I can’t explain it.

I also can’t explain this –

Remember when I posted about the recent storm and our loss of electricity? When my husband and I had an epic six hour gin rummy match by flashlight?

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We used a blue deck of cards I had in the drawer. Naturally I won because gin rummy was my mother’s game and she taught me well. Hope springs eternal for my husband, but he rarely beats me.

Wanting revenge, he pulled out the deck last night and we played again. I was skunking him and after I’d just dropped another gin… double points thanks to a spade… he complained about not drawing the jack he needed and picked up the deck to check how far down it was.

The deck we had just recently played with for 6 hours.

The deck that has been in the kitchen drawer, untouched, ever since.

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There wasn’t a single jack to be found. None. It was a deck of 48 cards.

Did Lord Dudley remove them all? Doubtful.

Is there a jack burglar on the loose in rural Maine? Equally as doubtful.

I’ve been joking lately about our house being cursed due to all the renovation nightmare mishaps, but damn. Now I’m really beginning to wonder.

What the hell is going on?

😳

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Crustacean dining tables and beds by Q.

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Furniture shopping with my husband continues and I can’t say it hasn’t been interesting.

Live edge dining tables seem to be a trend, and while I like some of them…

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The ones filled with resin are a little too plastic-y for me.

Not to mention those low backed drafting chairs. Ouch.

And speaking of resin…

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Yes, I live in Maine.

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But even I don’t want cooked lobster pieces and parts in my dining room table.

While my husband was examining that abomination, I spotted something across the room that made me look twice.

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A James Bond ejector bed?

Push a button if you’ve got a headache… and bam! Bye bye Romeo.

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On closer inspection it was just a weird way of storing pillows.

Still might work if it had enough thrust though…

😉

Can our marriage survive furniture shopping? Time will tell….

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Since we’ll be replacing our dining room set as well as our living room, I took my husband to a high end furniture store in Freeport last week.

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Thomas Moser pieces are custom made and truly gorgeous.

I liked this bed frame…

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But I admit they’re a wee bit expensive.

This chair?

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Almost $5,000… which had my husband running upstairs to the “bargain” outlet.

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Where there weren’t any bargains but some very nice owls…

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At the next store we were back to couches, where that was one too small…

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And this one too soft… even if you paid extra for firmer support cushions.

He did find me a green couch …

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But… no.

The only time he smiled that day?

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When he discovered a coffee table that doubled as a beer cooler.

🥴

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There’s no shake in my bake.

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I often complain about things in the kitchen. The toaster that doesn’t toast evenly, the dirty spoons my husband leaves on the counter and more often than not … the fact that we pay more for food each day but seem to get less.

I understand prices rise, and though I never like it… I expect it. What I don’t expect is to start cooking, reach for the 16 ounce can (box or bag of whatever) only to find it’s shrunken to 14. Two ounces short of what I need forcing me to downsize my recipe or worse yet, buy another full can (box or bag of whatever) and waste most of it.

Grrr.

The insanity needs to stop… because today I discovered it’s gone one step too far.

My husband likes the old fashioned Shake and Bake barbecue chicken so every once in a while I throw him a bone and make it.

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There I was with my foil wrapped pan, my chicken leg quarters and and a box of seasoning packets. I was primed and ready to shake.

Problem was… there was no shaker bag in the box. You know the ones – they were flimsy, never closed properly and weren’t big enough for whatever you needed to shake?

Nada.

Zip.

Nothing.

Even though the side of the box clearly states you should use it.

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This is egregious marketing.

If you no longer include the shaking apparatus? You should no longer be able to call yourself Shake and Bake.

That’s just false advertising.

😡

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