Tag Archives: humor

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News you can’t use.

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But someone can, and that’s even more disturbing.

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If this is what passes for television these days I’m glad I rarely watch it… but my first thought when reading the headline was the fact that I used to have a gynecologist who always asked me how things were “down there” when I stepped in her office. She misdiagnosed me for 2 years which resulted in me having to undergo a full abdominal hysterectomy. I should have known. If you’re unable to say the words uterus and vagina? You shouldn’t be treating them.

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While colorful … I’m taking a hard pass here and doubt anyone will be upset if I don’t bring this to the next potluck.

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With the price of real estate these days? This is a steal.

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I’m not on Tik Tok and rarely pay attention to their ridiculous trends…. but are their women who are seriously contemplating douching with borax?

WTH?

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The one place that rarely disappoints.

8 Comments

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Many of our favorite restaurants have been letting us down lately . Whether it’s lack of staff or a disregard for quality control I don’t know, but it’s nice to know one of our staples hasn’t dropped the ball.

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The Royal River Grille in Yarmouth usually has it all… relaxed atmosphere, creative cocktails and good food.

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First up? The Islander…

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This beauty contained cantaloupe infused gin, basil, simple syrup, lime juice, and tonic. Perfectly crisp and refreshing.

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My shrimp po boy was accompanied by a lovely sangria comprised of blueberry vodka, white wine, blueberry puree, lemonade and soda water that definitely hit the spot.

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Husband opted for a cup of clam chowder followed by a large batch of garlic and white wine mussels.

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When the restaurant is on the water, you have to salute it with seafood.

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Husband rounded off lunch with a brown butter cheesecake topped with hazelnut praline and surrounded by bourbon roasted cherry caramel sauce.

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And though I wasn’t going to, I couldn’t resist devouring a warm plum and almond tart with a citrus sugar dough crust, almond crumble topping, frangipane filling and vanilla ice cream.

The waddle to the car may not have been pretty, but it was satisfying.

😉

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Lobster… it’s not just good with butter.

15 Comments

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Living in the land of lobster, the tasty crustacean is often in our local news and rarely worth blogging about. But I saw this article the other day and was intrigued enough to share.

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While I’m fortunate enough not to suffer eczema, I do have friends that are afflicted and will be passing this on to them as well.

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Interesting, and if it works as claimed…. amazing.

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It’s weird, but it works.

13 Comments

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I’ve been battling bees on my hummingbird feeders for a while now. Once they find a sugar source, they’re hard to get rid of… but I think I’ve found a solution.

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Mint leaves.

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Bees hate the smell and hummingbirds can’t smell at all so it’s the perfect deterrent.

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If I can get the hummers used to the new leafy attachments.

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They kept buzzing around, not sure what to make of it.

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I didn’t think it would be a big deal. They drink nectar from flowers and flowers have leaves.

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A few brave souls have made peace with it so I’m hoping the rest will soon.

The bees?

Gone!

👍

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This is not good.

21 Comments

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As you know, we’ve had a wet summer in Maine. For a while there it was literally raining every other day. And though that’s kept our grass a lovely green it also makes for saturated ground that can’t absorb a random downpour … which is what happened the other day.

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I know my blog name is River, but I really didn’t want to see one flowing past my kitchen landing.

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It was a crazy amount of water.

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And before long it was creeping right into the garage.

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We’ve never had this happen before and I’m beginning to wonder if the new smooth driveway is funneling it through the path of least resistance.

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Thankfully it was gone in an hour or two, but I’m glad I didn’t have to go out, that’s shoe ruining water right there.

🥴

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It’s a pickle.

13 Comments

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I’m not sure what I did to deserve never ending pickle posts showing up on my Facebook feed, but here’s the latest batch of horrors.

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Gag.

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Once and for all… keep your pickles out pf my tequila!

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I’m from Jersey, which is next to Philly. We take our cheesesteak seriously …. this is a hard no.

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Word of warning – if you serve a pickle cake at your wedding? I’m getting you a clapper for a gift.

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That doesn’t even look appetizing.

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The eyes have it.

40 Comments

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My husband and I spent a few hours in a darkened room yesterday.

And sadly, it wasn’t the least bit fun.

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The room was an ocular surgeon’s office and we were there because my other half is going to have a cataract removed.

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This was just the pre surgery exam, the actual operation is scheduled for early December… because that’s the first appointment the surgeon has available. It’s nice to have a competent and skilled doctor, but waiting is the downside of popularity.

I truly hope I’m never in this position because while I have no problem with surgery and being cut open… I can’t have anyone near my eyes. Ever.

I can’t even put drops in. I’m that squeamish. I’d never have gotten through this pre-exam without heavy sedation.

Nope. Uh uh.

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It’s Dudley’s fault.

26 Comments

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I took Lord Dudley Mountcatten out for a walk the other day.

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Or rather, I tried to… as all he wanted to do was sit.

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Granted we’d just had rain and things were a little wet, as proved by this photo of our newly completed deck I lined up and photographed.

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As this was happening, His Lordship spotted a woodchuck in the day lilies and it started squealing.

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I pivoted, climbed to the second step, took a picture and then the Tasmanian Devil I had at the end of the leash decided to wind around my legs and make a dash at the chuck. This resulted in me stumbling off the steps, getting wrapped up in the leash and falling butt first in the flowers.

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See the large depression to the left? That was me and my ever expanding posterior.

I’m not sure who scared off the woodchuck, but I’m guessing it was the sight of my giant behind coming straight at him that made him beat feet.

No worries. I picked myself up, dug around the bushes for my phone and went inside where all was well.

Until I woke up the next day with intense pain on the right side of my bad knee.

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Something’s torn or strained or pulled because walking is painful and flexing my ankle makes me grimace.

As you can see, Lord Dudley was completely unharmed.

🥴

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