I must lead a sheltered life.

 

Because not only had I never heard of this woman and her bizarre career choice….

But I was totally unaware there was an audience for it as well.

I have an iPhone.

Which means I have Apple News.

So last week I was scrolling through the stories of the day and stumbled across this:

 

 

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I shouldn’t have watched.

I know that…. believe me. But I thought it was a joke. I figured I would laugh and blog about the ridiculousness of it.

It wasn’t a joke.

And apparently this is a thing.

There’s an entire  YouTube  channel devoted to watching Dr. Sandra Lee pop people’s pimples.

She has 5,643,803 subscribers FFS!

I fear for the future of the human race when over half a billion people have nothing better to do than watch this:

 

 

 

 

We’re doomed I tell you.

Doomed.

My only question is… why?

 

I never know what I’ll find in my husband’s barn.

The other day? I found this hanging on the wall….

 

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After I was through shuddering, I named it Creepy Baby.

Because, it’s a baby. And it’s creepy. I swear it’s eyes follow me around the room, and you know that never ends well.

I also saw this perched on the window sill.

 

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Yes….

 

 

It is what you think it is.

 

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The question is….

 

 

As a decorative item, it leaves a lot to be desired.

 

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And I can only hope the mechanism used to make it go boom isn’t in there as well.

But with my husband?

You never know.

 

 

 

 

Going hog wild…

 

I’m beginning to wonder if my town has a problem.

A pig problem.

 

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On the contrary, I love pigs….

But I’m starting to think they’ve all heard about the backyard buffet we lay out and are on their way.

You see, they’ve been escaping at an alarming rate.

Every time I check our local FB page –

 

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Well, they’d be pretty hard to miss now wouldn’t they?

 

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And as much as I love seeing new wildlife at out house, technically these guys aren’t wild…

 

 

And usually make a mess of their lawns.

So unless they’re housebroken and well groomed?

 

 

Kindly keep your piggies corralled.

 

 

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I’d hate to explain that accident to my car insurance company.

 

Too good not to share… the finale.

 

Crazy real estate agent’s photos part 3, and let’s start it off with a bang.

Or a boom as the case may be..

 

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There’s so much wrong with this I don’t even know where to start. Aside from the obvious WTF factor…. this guy looks like he’s getting ready to goose you. Why are his hands open wide? Why do you have to reach into his chest to flush? And considering what he must see everyday… why  the hell is he smiling?

 

 

Wow.

 

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Someone clearly had too much time… and acrylic paint… on their hands.

 

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Just your normal bathroom/dining room combo…

 

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And bathroom/kitchen combo….

 

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And bathroom/bedroom combo.

 

 

Porches.

 

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Not just for outside anymore.

 

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When you live in the city… but your wife really wants a cow.

 

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Because sun shade awnings are stylish anywhere.

 

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Proof positive there is such a thing as too much togetherness.

Truly.

 

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I’m not sure what’s more disturbing about this bizarre bathtub… the fact that it’s covered in carpet?

That it has 4 decorative poles?

Or that it appears to have an electric heater installed on the side?

 

 

 

I don’t know.

I really don’t.

A critter filled post.

 

Because my photo files are filled with critter pics.

 

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A wet fox.

 

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Two wet foxes.

 

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Okay, okay… moving on.

 

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Baby woodchuck.

 

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These pics are a month or two old, they’re not babies anymore.

 

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I can’t tell you exactly how old because my stupid camera’s date and time setting is broken and everything registers 1/1/1980.

Why? I have no frickin’ clue.

 

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Buck, on the field line.

 

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Doe, in the field.

 

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Wet skunk.

 

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Wet skunk and deer.

This next one is blurry, but how often do you get a shot of  a deer sticking her tongue out at a skunk?

 

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Skunk Rule #1?

Do not be rude to skunks.

They will make you pay… and the photographer’s house will stink for a week.

 

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More woodchucks….

 

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Eating apples.

 

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And woodchucks eating deer grain.

 

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More deer.

 

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And deer eating deer grain.

 

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More skunks.

 

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More foxes.

 

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Skunk and fox.

 

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Please remember Skunk Rule #1.

There is no Skunk Rule #2…. when the  tail goes up?

Run.

 

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More woodchucks.

I’d like to tell you that’s all the photos…. but it’s not even close.

That’s all for now though.

 

 

Hurricane humor….

 

Now don’t get me wrong, I’ve experienced many terrible storms over the years. When we lived down south we had trees come through the windows and parts of our roof ripped off. The destruction is real and nothing to be taken lightly…..

That being said, we also had a sense of humor.

 

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We had to.

And while my heart breaks for the people of the Bahamas suffering the devastation of Dorian, I’m twisted enough to laugh along with my friends in Florida who were spared the worst of her.

Their FB page had this the other day…

 

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A very useful thing when you’re living on canned goods and snacks because there’s no electricity.

They also posted this pic of their local grocery store.

 

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Now really…  how bad does your bread have to be to be the only brand left on the shelf during a hurricane?

And finally, this news blurb I saw on my phone.

Phil? I have two words for you –

Spell check.

 

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