Apparently, he likes me.

 

Sometimes WordPress makes me laugh because I follow a lot of funny people.

 

 

Sometimes it makes me laugh because a lot of funny people follow me.

 

 

And sometimes it makes me laugh for totally unexpected reasons.

Like the other day when I clicked my notifications and saw this:

 

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Clearly I must make TANBHIR laugh because he liked the hell out of every comment I made on one of my old posts.

Every single comment.

That’s a lot of laughing.

 

 

Not enough for him to actually comment back or add anything to the thread, but clearly TANBHIR likes the like button.

Unfortunately since TANBHIR  (Who must be a serious fellow since his name is all CAPS) only wants to help me make money online so I did not return the favor and like him back. I also removed him from my followers list.

Sorry TANBHIR, but I’m not here to make money.

Better luck next time.

 

 

Boys and their (too damned big) toys.

 

The husband had been sputtering about one for a year, so I knew ….

 

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Naturally he had to have the biggest one they sold…

 

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And we had to rent a damned trailer to get the silly thing home.

 

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Sigh.

Did we need a lawn mower with a cut radius almost as wide as I am tall?

No.

 

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But we’ve got one now.

And contrary to popular belief…. bigger is not better when trying to fit said mower in your shed.

 

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I told him it wouldn’t fit before he bought it.

 

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I told him it wouldn’t fit after he bought it.

 

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You know where this is going, right?

 

 

It wouldn’t fit.

 

 

Yeah. Who saw that coming?

So now…

 

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His precious car is going to live outside so the even more precious new toy can have half of the garage to itself.

 

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Men and their toys.

 

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Driving women crazy since time immemorial….

They’re a wee bit confused.

 

I put birdseed out for the birds….

 

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Which the deer eat.

 

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I put apples out for the deer….

 

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Which the woodchucks eat.

 

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Granted, they’re cute as all get out when they do…

 

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But do they have to eat the deer grain as well?

 

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Sometimes they climb right in the bowl and polish it off.

Which leads the deer to eat…

 

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It’s a vicious circle.

And proves that our backyard creatures are a little confused.

Like this Baltimore Oriole….

 

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Who tries to drink from the hummingbird feeder.

 

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Yes, you.

 

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The owner of this house spends a small fortune keeping you in fresh oranges and grape jelly…. don’t get greedy.

Of course….

This guy?

 

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Eats whatever…

 

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And whoever he wants.

 

 

 

It’s pretty damned close….


 

Okay ladies, (Or men. I won’t discriminate) have you ever been to Ulta beauty?

I hadn’t until the other day and my only question is…. why the Hell did I wait so long?

I was like a kid in a candy store, happily skipping up and down the product laden aisles. It was lovely… and I came home with bags full of wondrous scents,   war paint   make up, lotions, soaps and  spackle  face creams.

 

 

A little known fact, but true nonetheless.

The guys will never understand, but a woman’s search for the perfect mascara can be life long.

We need it…. like air.

 

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Am I right?

Of course I am.

 

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Never underestimate the power of cosmetics.

 

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So imagine my excitement when I found this –

 

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Yes, you read it correctly.

 

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Mascara that claims to be better than sex.

You know I had to try it.

 

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The applicator is hourglass shaped…

 

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For obscure Marilyn Monroe reasons.

And while my husband will be glad that I can honestly report it’s not better than sex.

Believe me when I say…

It’s pretty damned close!!

 

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Throwing some questions out into the universe.

 

Why is it that….

Every time you’re in a rush to get out the door?

Great Aunt Trudy will call and want to regale you with detailed stories of her piles.

If I didn’t want to hear about them the last 3 times we spoke? Chances are I really don’t want to hear about them when I’m 10 minutes late for an appointment.

 

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Why is it that

Every time I cut my hand in the kitchen?

I’m in danger of bleeding out because I can’t get the damned Bandaid package open with one hand.

Seriously, WTH?

 

 

Why is it that

Even though I’m a font of useless knowledge, I let my friends down last week when I couldn’t come up with the winning answer in a trivia game tie breaker at my local bar?

 

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But, come on.

Did you know that the original name for the Google search engine was…

BackRub?

No… I didn’t think so.

 

 

Why is it that…

Every time I take the time to wash and wax my car?

It either rains, or a flock of pigeons who’ve just eaten at Chipolte follow me home.

 

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Why is it that….

Every time I think I have absolutely nothing to blog about?

I always manage to come up with something ridiculous.

 

 

You’re welcome.

 

Too busy to enjoy.

 

Memorial Day.

 

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A time to remember and honor those who made the ultimate sacrifice.

The weekend dawned clear and bright, and while others were out on the lake or enjoying cookouts with friends…

We at Casa River were hard at work.

A winter that didn’t want to let go and one of the wettest springs I can remember left us with an utter nightmare of a landscape. Parts of the lawn have been a swamp for a month and impossible to mow, so this had to happen.

 

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That’s the husband.

Weed wacking the lawn.

You know how they always say the grass is greener over the septic tank?

 

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Believe it.

He was calf deep in a veritable field of thick heavy grass.

 

 

After the weed wacking came the mowing, and after the mowing…

 

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The raking of the mini hay field.

 

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People think we exaggerate when we say it takes the both of us, working all day, to do the weekly lawn maintenance.

We don’t. And it does.

But the weather cooperated for 3 days with warm sun and cool breezes and we got a lot done.

 

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I dragged the deck furniture out of the barn and finished the garden bed I had to redo….

Then hauled in another 30 bags of mulch for some others.

 

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I weeded, and mulched and reset border stones for 10 beds.

All prepped and ready for flowers.

 

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I spent the next day mowing and trimming and cutting back dead shrubs.

 

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And the day after that?

 

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I literally couldn’t move.

Everything that could hurt, did.

Neck, shoulders, arms, thighs, knees and feet.

 

 

Nothing like a long winter of inactivity to show you who’s boss.

I love our yard, but damn.

Sometimes it really kicks my ass.

 

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