Tag Archives: Bonk

Bonk… part 7.

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You know the drill, crazy excerpts from a book about sex, read at your own risk.

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I can honestly say I’ve never owned a vibrator, but if they can drive me to the grocery store and keep the conversation sparkling? I might have to reconsider.

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Reading this list has left me almost speechless. I say almost because I’m dying to know why the plantain needed a condom.

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I am now seriously rethinking the amount of time my husband spends on the throne.

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I enjoy the feeling of a clean and minty mouth…. but not that much.

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While at first glance this doesn’t seem like a bad thing, I can see how it might keep you distracted at work.. or little Susie’s ballet recital.

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Bonk… part 6.

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Same book about sex, same warning applies. Tender hearted readers take note.. it’s about to get weird.

First up in today’s excerpts are tales from the factory floor.

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Being a porn star isn’t limited to (and I use this term loosely) acting in films. Apparently you can make money recreating and selling your penetrable parts. Who knew?

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Wise choice Maria. No need to make daddy feel inferior.

Leaving the body part factory, we get a history lesson in contraceptives.

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I suppose a cat liver ankle might dissuade the foot fetish suitors.

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I don’t know about you, but I’ve met many a woman with a furious womb.

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Is it any wonder the womb is furious? Geesh. No one wants to be compared to a badger.

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Bonk… part 5.

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Required sex warning – the following contains explicit excerpts from one seriously wacky book. Continue at the risk of disturbing mental images.

As you already know, the male member, its malfunctions and various cures feature heavily in this series.

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Because sometimes you feel like pumping, and sometimes you don’t.

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I’m not a man and therefor have no physical frame of reference… but is perpetual half mast really where men want to be?

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The Smithsonian has a penis bone collection? Why doesn’t this surprise me..

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It seems Thai women are not to be screwed with. Or Thai ducks either for that matter..

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The little man in the boat? I can’t even….

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It makes you wonder just how much suction one man could need. And remember, I did warn you about mental images.

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Bonk … part 3.

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You know the drill. This book is about sex… proceed at your own peril.

The first fun fact will thrill men and relieve their locker room anxiety in no time flat.

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This next item will come as no surprise to women.

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Seriously, we never doubted this.

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Now there’s a recipe I never thought I’d share.

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I didn’t feel the need to watch Iron crotch, but if you’re so inclined? Please write a review.

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Nose erections. Tell me how glad you are to be my blog follower now.

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I hear volunteering for public service is good for the soul. Perhaps I should include a sign up sheet…?

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Bonk… part 2.

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The warning still stands. Graphic ( but funny ) sexual content to follow.

Read at your own risk!

Remember the days when you agonized over your Halloween costume? Dressing up and getting it just right was important.

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I don’t know about you, but a Grim Reaper penis is not likely to heighten anything for me except anxiety.

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Yes, there’s an entire section of this book devoted to Napoleon’s great grand niece and her crazy theories on female orgasms. I’ll spare you the details.

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I admit to shuddering slightly after reading this footnote. Rock salt and shredded newspaper? I have never in my life been so glad I don’t live in Indonesia.

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Sorry Betty. but I shall be referring to it as the Whipple Tickle from now on.

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Bonk… part 1.

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Warning:

This book will be not be for everyone. Graphic (and often sarcastic) excerpts dealing with human sexuality will follow. Nothing is off limits. If that’s not your cup of tea, there’s no shame in bowing out now and exiting stage left. But if you stay and are insulted by the content? Kindly keep your moral outrage to yourself… I did warn you.

Still here?

Then buckle up and let’s begin.

The first thing that struck me while reading this book was how many people have actively researched sex. Scientifically, psychologically and oddly enough physically. Masters and Johnson were among the most famous….

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Of course he did.

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If you’re still here, I warn you that’s far from the weirdest thing you’ll read in this series.

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Pyrex butt plugs. You’ll never look at your casserole dish the same way again, I know.

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Corn dogs are forever dead to me now. Not a huge loss in my culinary catalog, but still.

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Bonk. A preview….

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The next book in my marvelously bizarre Mary Roach series is Bonk.

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And I should warn you, things are going to get extremely strange. If you’re the least bit squeamish about the subject of human sexuality I suggest you skip these posts because nothing is off limits.

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I loved Stiff in all its macabre glory… and when the topic is sex, you know Mary is going to bring it. Here’s a sneak peak at some of the chapter titles.

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Scientific research features heavily throughout the book.

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Of course they did.

If you’re up (so to speak) for a fascinating in depth look at sex, I promise you’ll learn some interesting tidbits, trivia, titillating trifles, facts about men, women and the lengths (so to speak) they’ll go to in the pursuit of pleasure.

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No doubt!

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