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Of all the awful real life pickle abominations my algorithms make me view, I finally found one worth my time.
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The Pickle Sisters!
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This was just silly enough to be true…they didn’t call them the roaring twenties without reason…. but sadly it wasn’t. Further research showed it to be a complete fallacy.
Very disappointing, that.
I mean, look how beautiful they are in technicolor.
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If you’ve been paying attention, you’ll know I love cheese. And soft ripened French cheese? Ooh la la!
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But Camembert cheese potato chips? Be still my artery clogged heart!
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If not for the fact that these are probably laden with chemicals and enough sugar to sweeten a lemon grove…. they might be fun.
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Wow. This has got to win the ugliest lamp ever award.
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And disappointingly, just when I was thinking of ordering one as a gag gift…. I read a bunch of comments saying it was fake.
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I love steampunk, but judging from the price on their website I’m guessing they’re right.
Damn. It might have looked great on the bar.
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Yes, you.
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You annoying fake blogger who follows me every single day…
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With different fake pages…
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And different fake names.
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I defy you, and remove every last one of your cursed fake sites.
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If you think you’ll out stubborn me?
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I fear you’ve met your match.
My Whack a Mole record is legendary.
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Lately there’s always something photo worthy at the grocery store.
Since the viral apocalypse, I’ve been seeing weird things on the shelves. Every day items have been replaced with generic and no name brands.
And when it comes to no name brands?
You can’t get any more nameless than this toilet paper.
Not wasting money on advertising slogans here. No sir.
Another weird sight?
A line of products approved by a skinny earth friendly butcher.
Beefy flavored stroganoff?
I’ll pass.
Chickenless Buffalo chicken?
Nope. It’s all yours.
But at least the pad Thai had authentic rice noodles. Because there’s nothing worse than wannabe rice.
And okay, I get it…. vegans have to eat. But it always makes me chuckle the lengths they’ll go to to approximate the taste of meat. If they don’t want to eat animal flesh, fine. They can stuff themselves with kale. Heck, I’ll gladly give them my share.
But enough with the winking plant protein butcher.
He’s not fooling anyone.
River's world..... 