Tag Archives: blogging

Let’s talk about Spam….

 

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I have to admit, WordPress’s spam catcher is pretty effective.

Although, come on….

 

jhgyeuwi

 

They could have let that through.

So it never ceases to amaze me how many people and companies keep trying. I mean, yes… practice makes perfect.  And kudos to them for their tenacity, but today I had 33 spam messages trapped.

33.

6 of them from the pretty guinea pig.

Buy Amoxil 500mg Amoxicillin http://theprettyguineapig.com/amoxicillin/

Who clearly thinks I need an antibiotic.

 

987456512321

 

Damn…

That’s a disturbing thought.

Then there’s this cryptic example.

Research – good research is significant to buying
a reliable dress. With the drive comes the need of creation. It is unachievable
to “make” others happy, in but the. That is, as long as you follow that will. http://pro-social.ru/bitrix/redirect.php?event1=&event2=&event3=&goto=http://aidanharris.com/__media__/js/netsoltrademark.php%3Fd=cuci.today

 

While I agree buying the right dress may require a little extra effort…

 

wedding-dress-from-60-amp-039-s_o_3055653

 

They lost me with  “It is unachievable
to “make” others happy, in but the. That is, as long as you follow that will.”

Maybe making others happy in the but is achievable.

Don’t scoff, everyone needs a life goal.

I was a little disappointed to see this flagged as Spam –

 

Frank
Frank

20 hours ago·

tunklitankli.com

Your site has exceptional content. I bookmarked the site

 

Because hey –

 

98765

 

 

This one surprised me –

taylor swift 22 live billboard
taylor swift 22 live billboard

It is often a fast-paced, high-risk trading option that potentially
gives substantial returns. This mentality will
absolutely move you killed.

 

Taylor Swift wants to kill me if I move?

 

70c5ff99fc5baf90890630bdf6ccd68a

 

Yeah, well… bite me Taylor.

You can’t keep a boyfriend and I’ve been married 35 years. Hope your Grammys keep you warm at night.

Then there are the never ending, non stop online casino ads.

These spammers are dedicated. Once they find you? They don’t let go…. but that’s okay. Because yes, they do make me laugh.

Texas hold em poker has slip on huge around turmoil.

 

Texas has huge slip ons?

 

 

920x920

 

That’s just wrong.

 

“…this is nonetheless not preferable to gamble by having an above exhausted head.”

Agreed.

I hate having an above exhausted head.

 

exhausted-cat-memes-6

 

..”When asked for advice, the nice I could offer was for him to continue
playing Gin using wife.”

I’m no marriage expert, but the only type of gin I want my husband to be playing with is this:

 

hACEDEBBA

 

 

And finally…

“Did the enemy team get Baron due to the fact nobody on the own group warded this?
Did an enemy stroll into five of yourself and pass on? Every tiny mistake needs for famous to create certain you can study.
To fail to Do that a lot of.”

Yes, the enemy team got Baron Trump, because really… who wants to deal with that dad on the sidelines?

I don’t remember the enemy strolling in and passing on. Let me ask my 4 other personalities and get back to you.

But…. help me out here. What does every tiny mistake need?

Even I can’t unpack that one.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Because nothing ever goes smoothly.

As we were driving down to Phoenix, I checked my Delta mobile app and saw that not only had our flight been cancelled due to bad weather, but that we’d been scheduled for one the following day… which was forecast to be an even worse storm.

Thinking oh Hell no, I called the airline and argued, cursed, berated,  begged, pleaded, flirted, and okay…. promised a future child to secure us a flight for that day.

Im-not-proud

It worked, but we couldn’t fly into Maine as planned and could only get as far as Boston. This forced the husband to frantically scour his phone contacts to see which friend he could talk into driving south 3 hours in a raging blizzard to pick us up.

You find out who your true friends are in situations like that.

vndgfue

Yeah.

Because I can’t honestly say I would have done it.

And now….

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The required  she has to have the window seat so she can take pictures even though she has no idea where or what they are  aerial photos.

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No matter how many times I fly…

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I’m always that geeky kid who gets a huge kick out of looking down on our world.

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The ever changing landscapes never cease to thrill me.

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The grandeur of the mountains…

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The ridiculous giant tiddly winks….

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It’s all good.

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What do you do with a 4 hour layover in Minneapolis?

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You drink….

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You eat a surprisingly decent shrimp alfredo….

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And watch this cowpoke couple play video games without speaking to each other for over an hour and a half.

Not one word.

Ah, modern living. Where the art of conversation is well and truly dead.

Long story short…

( Who am I kidding, I’ve never told a short story in my life. This vacation was 2 weeks long and it’s taken me 48 days to blog about it. But in my defense? There were a lot of rocks.)

We arrived home exhausted at 4:30 am… after a nail biting  (just an expression, I pay way too much for these babies to nibble)  5 hour  (should have taken 2.5)  snow blinded  (there must have been a road, but we didn’t see it)  ice covered  (slipperier than a Trump family lawyer)  drive.

The end.

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No, truly.

No more rocks, no more vacation pics.

I don’t even have the next trip planned yet.

i-felt-a-great-disturbance-in-the-force-as-if-millions-of-voices-suddenly-breathed-a-sigh-of-relief

And now..

Back to your regularly scheduled program.

Out with the old, in with the….

 

Yeah, whatever.

I’m not big on the retrospective “best of  (insert year) ” posts. And I’d never bore you with all the New Year’s resolutions I plan to break. (or most likely, have already broken.)  Don’t “tag” me with the 20 questions game, I won’t play.  Throwback Thursday, What The Hell Wednesday and Seriously, Who Cares Saturday are not my thing. That doesn’t mean I won’t enjoy reading yours.. ( well… I might not, but if it’s Saturday you won’t care. And that’s a beautiful thing.)

I’ve always marched to the beat of my own drum.. (and yes, the occasional Mariachi Band. But only if the margaritas are stellar.)  …so you’re more apt to find a blog about flying poop than profound thoughts on the coming New Year on my page this week.

 

 

But I did want to take a minute to say thank you.

Thank you for reading, for following, for laughing and most of all? Thank you for making me feel welcome in the few months that I’ve been here. I’ve been blogging for longer than I care to remember and have had a lot of sites die from underneath me. While I sincerely hope that was poor management or low readership numbers and not the direct result of my setting up shop there…. (Damn. Did I really kill them all? If so, let me apologize in advance for dooming this wonderful site to a fiery end.) … you lot have made me feel welcome at WordPress, and for that I’m grateful.

So here’s to another year of crazy.

Of finding the ridiculous and sharing it.

Another year of irony.

Of adventure.

And of friendship.

Most definitely of that.

 

 

Thanks for being my tribe.

 

 

How’s this for irony?

 

You stuck with me for 29 posts about our vacation to the Berkshires last month.

(29! I think that’s a record, even for me.)

 

You-done-Yet-No-really-you-done-cause-I39m-sleep-over-here-meme-18624

 

Yes, I’m really done.

But admit it… you enjoyed the ride, right?

 

 

Okay,  that was hurtful.

But thanks to modern technology, and WordPress’s scheduling feature…… as you sit and read this post on the 18th, I’ve actually just returned from a new vacation in the mountains of Vermont.

 

noooooooooo

 

Yes.

It’s true.

We left on the 10th, and came back the 17th.

 

 

And rest assured I’ll have hundreds more pictures of our adventures that I’ll  have to share.

 

that-would-be-great-kill-me-meme

 

You’re welcome.

The blogging life.

 

I had lunch with a friend the other day and we were in the middle of an epic catch up session when I mentioned I’d found a new blog site and was really enjoying it.

Me –  “It’s a large platform with lots of amazing writers.”

Her –  “Blogging?  Yeah… I’ve never understood the appeal.”

Me –

       

 

Her –  “It seems so totally self absorbed. I mean, what do you blog about?”

Me –   *sputtering*  *turning red*

“Life!”

( I may have screamed. I’m not sure.)

But it got me thinking, what do I blog about? Right now, it’s whatever nonsense is floating around in my head and needs to get out. That long fuzz covered blue thingy in the back of the fridge that may or may not have started life as a pickle? Sure! The old lady at Goodwill who had a vibrator in her cart because she thought it was a portable hand blender? Absolutely! But it wasn’t always that way.

No… back in the early days of Yahoo 360 and Multiply, it was personal.  I ranted about family, and relationships, and mother in laws from Hell. I had a small community of close friends who knew (almost) everything that was happening in my life. And then I got burned. I was posting about a particularly horrid SIL… okay, I may have called her  a hag. But she was. And still is. And crikey… she wasn’t supposed to be reading it! But she did and ….

 

 

Yeah, the proverbial excrement hit the rotating blade.

See…. I’ve always kept my blogging life and real life separate. The husband is an uber-private person and hates it if I tell my best friend anything… no less people on line that we’ve never actually met. So what did the hag do? She found my online blog presence, read every single post I’d ever made and left a seriously hateful comment on the last one. (At 3:30 in the morning no less. Clearly it was a riveting read.) And no… we haven’t spoken since. That was 8 years ago.

So I shut it down. No more public access, no more personal details.

And then it became a “thing” in our marriage. You know,  the “things”.  Those topics that no matter how many years you spend together, they’ll always cause friction. I mean geesh, I wasn’t spilling racy secrets from the bedroom….. (and I won’t no matter how much you beg me.  You’re welcome.) …. I was joking about the crap he accumulates in the cellar! Where’s the harm in that? But I got tired of the snide, “Oh, I suppose you’re going to blog about that now” comments every time something happened, so after my first site died a slow death?  I told him I was done blogging.

But I wasn’t.

So yes…. you lot are my guilty, secret pleasure. (How pathetic is that? Nothing dark and twisted, just you. Sigh…)

 

 

There, I said it.

I blog on the down low. And I keep it light… because for me, it’s always been about entertainment. I know there are a lot of inspirational blogs about overcoming hardships, heartfelt blogs about love and loss, fashion blogs, cooking blogs, gardening blogs…. and I enjoy them all. Even the occasional blog about running. (Do you have any idea how many of them there are? What’s wrong with people? Don’t they own comfortable chairs…?)  I mean… I’m diverse damn it! I can read about other people running even if I personally feel like  –

 

466484

 

That’s the wonderful thing about blogging! It’s unique to each and every person who does it…. and if you’re lucky enough to find bloggers of similar interests and styles?  Who laugh with you.. and occasionally at you?

You’ve found your tribe.

For me, they’re usually snarky, smart mouthed, fringe dwellers who are just a little bit bent. Because… well, I’ve been told I’m a little hard to take.

 

 

Shocking, I know.

But my husband has always felt the need to warn his co workers about me before we meet, so there must be something to it. I may look sweet, but my mouth does tend to get me in trouble when it gets going. And if I’m feeling comfortable enough around you to let the crazy out?

 

love memes for her and him - funny i love you memes

 

You’re my people.

😎

Newbie question.

 

So the fact that WordPress thinks I’m trash and my comments need to be thrown into the Spam folder den of iniquity got me thinking….

 

 

How do they determine what’s Spam? Do they filter through key words or volume of traffic like some blogging version of the NSA?

 

imagesN7N9XVO9

 

And why do I have numerous followers who clearly want nothing to do with me other than to hawk their direct marketing schemes? I understand people make money on their pages here, and that’s great. But if someone like bombs 18 of my posts in 18 seconds just to get me to check out their business site…

What’s up with that?

 

 

I’ve never been one of those people who determines their worth by how many followers, friends or contacts are on their list. My ego isn’t that fragile, and I guess I was wondering if y’all keep those type of bloggers…. or remove them from your followers list?

Because I already get enough phone calls from Rachel at Card Holder Services in real life, I don’t need it here.

 

those-telemarketers_o_1268537

 

Is WordPress hangry?

 

And if not…. why does it keep eating my comments?

So I’m happily cruising blogs, leaving killer comments, thinking…

“Ya, I really slayed that one.”

Only to go back a while later   wondering why no one has complimented me on my razor sharp witcursing the blog owner for ignoring me ,  to read other comments and find that mine has disappeared.

 

frabz-POOF-16ce17

 

So, I leave the same killer comment again.

Making sure it stuck this time…

 

glu

 

Sorry, my mind went there.

And if I check a third time? Yeah… the comment is still A.W.O.L.

 

 

There are only 3 possible explanations.

  1.   The blog owner doesn’t think I’m clever and deleted it. (No, that can’t be it.  I’m delightful, damn it!)
  2.   I was dreaming and/or ghost typing in my sleep.  (Possible, but not likely. Although I did sleep walk as a child and apparently watched an entire Vincent Price movie without waking up… which is really the only way to enjoy The Tingler.)

Yes, that’s a real movie.

Don’t believe me?

 

The_Tingler_t800

 

monimovie_com-The_Tingler

 

You can thank me for the nightmares later.

And finally,  reason #3.  WordPress is hangry…. or just plain screwing with the newbie.

Which is the reason I’m leaning toward because… every once in a while?  My comment will post 4 times making me look desperate for attention. (Which I’m not, really…. no matter how many times I hang out my window and yell, “Hey sailor!”)

So, WordPress?

Cut it out.

The newbie is not amused.