Tag Archives: pandemic

Pandemic humor.

 

Because someone has to laugh, and it might as well be you.

 

 

Ya gotta love Madison Avenue….

Simple ads are always the best.

 

 

As was I.

So where is it?

 

 

I don’t have any personal experience with this, but I can see their point.

 

 

Well those don’t look at all bunion friendly.

 

 

Now why didn’t I think of that?

 

 

As good an explanation as any.

 

 

Because cleanliness is so important.

Pandemic humor…

 

Because laughter is literally the only medicine.

 

 

I haven’t walked into a bar in 142 days.

Let that sink in…. and tell me pigs aren’t flying somewhere.

 

 

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Correct signage has never been more important.

 

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I’m beginning to notice a trend.

 

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He’s right.

We probably are.

 

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Finally, a way to make men wear masks!

Thank you Katie.

And if all that was too depressing, let me leave you with this…..

 

 

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You’re welcome.

Something for everyone.

 

Can’t find a mask to suit your personality?

I think I can help with that.

For all my wonderful women friends?

 

 

For all my slightly wine addicted friends?

 

 

For Star Wars fans like  James.

 

 

Do you love horses… or just want to look like one?

I’ve got your back.

 

 

There are even masks for those who need to read lips.

 

 

And of course, there are masks made just for me..

 

 

And because I shamefully admit there are multiple tie dye items in my closet….

 

This one is calling my name.

 

 

I should probably wear one of those when assisting my husband with outdoor projects.

Dr. Seuss has a say…

 

 

And finally,  if you’re just sick and tired of everyone?

 

CSA, grocery store oddities and…. pie.

 

Our neighbor’s farm is still churning out a bounty.

 

 

 

This week it was fresh basil, beets, parsley, Boston lettuce, giant scallions, heirloom zucchini and a large radish.

But oh, what a beautiful radish it was…

 

 

Who knew they could be so gorgeous!

This week at my local grocery store…

 

 

Seriously, are we back to hoarding paper towels now?

WTF.

It’s enough to make me want to grab a pitchfork and storm someone’s pantry. The world is not ending Karen… you don’t need 72 rolls of Bounty.

On another note, this –

 

 

Parmesan style what?

And why in hell would anyone buy fake cheese.

 

 

For all we know that stuff is grated styrofoam.

Sprinkle it on your spaghetti or cushion that garden gnome you’re mailing to Aunt Edna.. it’s nothing if not versatile.

And finally…. pie.

But not the fruit or cream variety.

 

 

Shepherd’s Pie, one of my husband’s favorite comfort foods.

 

 

Made with ground lamb thank you very much. If it’s beef, it’s Cottage Pie.

It shouldn’t surprise you to know the husband ate every drop of these two dishes. I’ll cook it, but rarely eat it. Too bland by far.

Pandemic humor.

 

Because it’s not over yet and laughter is still the only medicine.

 

 

Okay ladies, who’s with me?

 

 

I hope this was helpful.

Personally, I’ve never been peed on…. but you can never be too careful.

 

 

Fess up.

Which one of you morons did this and cursed us all?

 

 

Corona like a Viking!

Sword optional.

 

 

So take one for the team.

If I have to wear a bra in public, it’s the least you can do.

CSA and grocery store horrors.

 

This week’s offering from our CSA was a little lean on our end because there were a lot of things we don’t eat and elected to let our neighbor take.

 

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Cilantro, bok choi, kale, turnips, spigarello, fennel, and kohlrabi? We passed.

But the chard was rainbow colored…

 

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So there is that.

And in the continuing saga of bizarre grocery items found on my local shelves…..

 

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Every possible mutation of pasta imaginable are still being pushed.

 

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As is the ever present  (and still disgusting)  kale.

Delicious? I doubt it.

Crazy good? Not possible.

Stop the insanity and put kale back where it belongs…. in a rabbit’s colon. Other than the trash can, that’s the only proper place.

 

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Thankfully there was one sane product line of which I took full advantage.

 

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Let the grilling begin.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Randomness.

 

We’ve been busy with other things outside, but I’m still managing to keep Amazon afloat during the pandemic.

 

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And if you’re dying to read the new Hunger Games book? Don’t bother, it was rather disappointing. And while I’d given up on Stephen King… this new collection of short stories has my late BIL in it again, thinly disguised but still recognizable to those who knew him. He and Stephen went to school together.

And no, I won’t tell you which character. I’m evil that way.

 

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The fabulous rose I planted last year has finally decided to bloom.

 

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And it was worth waiting for.

On another note, isn’t it great when your friends get you?

 

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My girlfriend gave me this the other day and damn, it’s perfect!

 

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As is this beauty.

 

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Have you ever tried to photograph butterflies?

It’s not easy. This was the one lucky shot out of 20.

 

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Our raccoon decided to take a bath, dig through my garden bed and then attempted to climb up the garage the other night.

Why? I have no idea.

 

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But even I can’t argue with that.

 

 

Pandemic humor.

 

Because if I don’t laugh I might have to hurt someone.

 

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Add a margarita and it sounds like a plan.

 

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Because if you won’t wear a mask, why should I wear pants?

And after almost 4 months of doing nothing?

Trust me… you want me to wear pants.

 

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Ah, Spam. The miracle meat no one wants to eat.

Wait a minute….. do you think they could behind this whole thing?

The virus is a hoax engineered to make people eat 83 year old canned ham!

Or maybe….

 

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It’s a canine revenge plot.

Either way, we’re stuck with it…

And it’s nice to see Maine stores still have a sense of humor.

 

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Enough with the substitutes.

 

In the last three months I’ve seen pasta fly off the grocery store shelves.

Pandemic shopping fever has wiped them clean at times and all that was left were substitutes.

Kale linguini?

Not if my life depended on it.

Squash angel hair?

Thank you, no.

So imagine my horror when I saw this in the refrigerated section this morning.

 

 

Tofu fettuccine and spaghetti.

What fresh Hell is this!

I picked up a package and it felt like slimy rubber…. which is probably what it tastes like it as well.

 

Grocery store funnies.

 

Lately there’s always something photo worthy at the grocery store.

Since the viral apocalypse, I’ve been seeing weird things on the shelves. Every day items have been replaced with generic and no name brands.

And when it comes to no name brands?

You can’t get any more nameless than this toilet paper.

 

 

Not wasting money on advertising slogans here. No sir.

Another weird sight?

 

 

A line of products approved by a skinny earth friendly butcher.

Beefy flavored stroganoff?

I’ll pass.

Chickenless Buffalo chicken?

Nope. It’s all yours.

But at least the pad Thai had authentic rice noodles. Because there’s nothing worse than wannabe rice.

And okay, I get it…. vegans have to eat. But it always makes me chuckle the lengths they’ll go to to approximate the taste of meat. If they don’t want to eat animal flesh, fine. They can stuff themselves with kale. Heck, I’ll gladly give them my share.

But enough with the winking plant protein butcher.

He’s not fooling anyone.