Tag Archives: pandemic

When ya gotta go….

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Sometimes you just have to go. Which, when on the road during a global pandemic, can be a challenge.

Yesterday the husband had to physically enter his office for the first time since March to pick up some paperwork, so we took the scenic route which added a half hour to the hour long drive. The sun was shining, the leaves were turning…. life was good. Until those 2 large glasses of iced tea I had with lunch kicked in.

I don’t know what’s it like in your part if the world, but here in Maine a lot of the convenience stores, gas stations and fast food places have closed their rest rooms to customers for fear of spreading the virus.

It took us 4 stops to find a Burger King that welcomed people with full bladders. And by the look of the pictures on the doors? I wasn’t the only one in dire need.

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Pandemic humor.

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Because if I don’t laugh, I’ll scream.

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That looks about right.

This year you’re screwed no matter which way you go.

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Karen.

That slut ruins everything.

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Admit it, we’ve all been there.

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This literally made me snort.

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I’ve been hearing banjo music for a while now…

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That’s a pretty accurate representation of my year. How about you?

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One can only hope.

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You first. I’ll hold your purse….

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CSA and grocery store weirdos.

 

Swiss chard, celery, onion, basil, radishes, carrots, dill, scallions, tomato, pepper and something I’d never tried before.

A Korean melon.

 

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It’s a delicate flavor, like cantaloupe… with the consistency of a cucumber.

At the store this week –

 

 

A clearance sale on Hostess coffee.

Poor SnoBalls.

Apparently no one likes them in caffeinated liquid form either.

 

 

Italian flour.

WTH?

Do the Irish and French have some as well. And if so, why?

 

 

Gag.

More meatless meat. This time in balls.

So wrong.

 

 

And yes, the brand name toilet paper was still on the shelves.

But right across the aisle?

 

Not a Brawny or Bounty in sight.

Thirsty paper towels?

Trust me, they’re anything but.

Just call me Scarlett.

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Scarlett O’Hara was quite a broad.

Selfish? Yes. Manipulative? Most assuredly. But lately, I’ve seen shades of myself in her most famous quote:

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Never again.

Yes dear readers, I have vowed that a fall resurgence of the world wide pandemic will not catch me unaware again.

It’s true.

I have become that which I despise.

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There are 16 boxes of tissues in my spare bathroom closet.

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And yes….

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There are 23 rolls of paper towels and 22 rolls of toilet paper in my spare bathroom tub.

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So bring it Covid 19 hoarding shoppers! Clear the store shelves of bathroom paper supplies at your first October sniffle.

River Scarlett is ready.

She will never wipe her butt with sandpaper again!

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I love my town.

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And I love what people post on its Facebook page.

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Oh no.

If you see it?  Please tell it we serve a daily and nightly buffet free of charge.

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I’m not exactly sure what constitutes ‘groovy’ lamb.

But I’m pretty sure this isn’t it.

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Jumping orangey peach colored fish?

Thanks 2020. Like this year wasn’t weird enough.

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I have to admit I’d never even heard of letterboxing before.

Sounds like a perfect Covid era activity though.

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Normally I’d say friend.

But it’s 2020, for all we know that thing is radioactive.

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A giant vacuum cleaner?

Well, yeah.  They want us to social distance…  so just stick the hose end into your local pub and switch her on.

Pandemic humor.

 

Milton Berle said laughter is an instant vacation.

So you might as well laugh, because no one’s going to Cabo anytime soon.

 

 

 

This week’s selections have a theme….

 

 

 

 

Which is basically 2020 bites….

 

 

 

 

And we’re over it.

 

 

 

Never has there been such a crazy, utterly wasted year.

 

 

 

Yes….

 

 

 

 

That pretty much says it all.

Social distancing chuckles.

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Where there’s a will there’s a way.

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In this scenario, I see my noodle landing in my margarita… and no one wants that.

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Distance.

It’s all relative.

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Canadians have the right idea with hockey sticks. You can measure distance as well as crack heads if someone gets too close.

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Wisconsin? I don’t know. I’d rather not be on the back end of that ruler…

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Bubble gyms?

If they were covered in black fabric so no one could see my quarantine twenty jiggling… maybe.

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Excellent.

And I bet their conversation is more interesting than your cousin Darryl’s anyway.

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Squirrels are people too.

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Pffft!

What’s next, motion sensor operated baptism?

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Now that makes sense!

When you have way too much time on your hands…

 

I saw an article the other day about all the amazing things people are doing with the spare time the pandemic shutdowns are providing them.

Some were worth while.

Others?

You decide.

 

 

Did Rufus McToofus need his very own adirondack chair to celebrate accordingly?

Probably not.

 

 

 

 

That’s so special it hurts.

 

 

Just…. wow.

What do you suppose those ducks are posting on social media? Can someone please investigate and report back. I’d hate for those ducks to have a more interesting blog than mine.

 

 

Finally….

A worthy use of time.