Goodbye rocks…

March 10, 2019 Rivergirl 31 Comments

The day I’d been dreading had arrived.

Our Arizona departure.

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(Hang on, not quite yet.)

We packed, and while cleaning out the condo I found this.

Oh, sure. Hide the wild animal warning sheet where the unsuspecting tourists won’t find it until it’s too late. Heck, I would have enjoyed spotting the occasional wild pig or bloodthirsty squirrel strolling the grounds during our stay… but no. And now we’re leaving. What a rip off.

Check out time was 10:00 am, but our flight didn’t leave till 2:30 pm so we took our time and said goodbye to the rocks.

The beautiful red rocks…

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We said goodbye to the pink sidewalks and buildings…

I even said goodbye to this guy…

Who was still trying to escape the rocks.

We had our last chuckle at the weirdest mailbox we’d ever seen.

And bid the rocks farewell…

You’re beautiful….

And we will miss you..

(Okay, I’ll miss you. The husband said once you’ve seen one rock, you’ve seen them all. He’s a heathen. A heathen I tell you!)

And just like that, we were gone…

Heading down to Phoenix to catch our flight.

Phoenix.

Where there are no rocks…

Just cactus.

Lots and lots of cactus.

Veritable forests of cactus.

Some of them … weird.

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Okay…

Not that weird, but still.

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It’s all about the rocks… and some food.

March 9, 2019 Rivergirl 18 Comments

Our last meal in Sedona was a late lunch and of course, it turned out to be the best restaurant we found during our two week trip.

Yes Martin, this is a food filled post.

You’re welcome.

Perched on top of a hill, the Mariposa Grille had some great views. (Of rocks.)

Mariposa means butterfly in Spanish, and they featured prominently in the decor at this Latin themed beauty.

Views (And rocks! Did you see the rocks?) aside..

It was a large…

And rather impressive place.

I mean hey, check out that door.

It’s made of rocks!

There was live music with a Spanish guitar, and more beautiful views.

(Of rocks!)

I ordered a few Caipirinhas… the national drink of Brazil.

Just to get in the proper mood and spirit of the place.

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And then on the advice of the waiter, we tried the Yuca fries.

Not to be confused with Yucca… which apparently tastes like soap… the Yuca were too die for!

To be honest, I had no idea what they were at that point.

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But had I Googled this Yuca meme beforehand?

I most assuredly would have passed.

Lunch for me was the Funghi Sublime. And sublime it was.

Scottsdale Burger Battle Judges’s Choice Winner 2018 ~ Smothered in sauteed Mushrooms, finished with imported Truffle Cheese and Truffle Dijonnaise

That burger positively melted in my mouth and was expertly cooked.

My husband ordered the Senor Fish, and was not disappointed either.

Pan-Fried and Seasoned with their House Rub, Lemon-Caper Aioli, and Shredded Romaine, on a Whole Grain Bun accompanied by 3 Seed Coleslaw.

This was an upscale South American restaurant with Latin inspired cuisine, and everything was served on the most wonderful plates. (Rocks! They were made from rocks!) I wish we’d found it sooner and been able to go back for a full dinner. I’m sure it would have been marvelous.

How upscale you ask?

There was some interesting artwork hanging on the walls…

Made with some rather expensive rocks.

And they were all for sale.

Yeah.

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Rocks.

Ya gotta love ’em.

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But maybe not that much.

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Splatter dabs, rat urine and my worst nightmare.

March 8, 2019 Rivergirl 23 Comments

I learned a lot on our final walk around the Sedona Heritage Museum.

(I’d ask you to name this rusty piece of crap, but they beat me to it.)

I learned about tent houses.

All the comforts of home.

Not.

And if I needed any more proof that I wouldn’t have made a good settler’s wife?

That’s it right there.

I also learned about big pancakes.

Really big pancakes.

Which got me thinking…

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Makes perfect sense to me.

Entering the fruit packing shed that was used when the property was a working orchard..

The husband fell in love with this old machine.

Which I admit was kind of cool.

But I also liked the funky steam punk apple peeler.

Although that first bite has got to be hard on the teeth.

The shed had a lovely old carriage.

And a short film on the history of Sedona.

There was also some fascinating info on rat urine.

Yes, rat urine.

A woefully under explored topic in most museums…

I often call my husband a pack rat, because he comes home with all sorts of ~~trash~~ treasure as well.

But damn. 20,000 years?

That’s some powerful pee.

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And now, our final discovery.

My worst nightmare.

There was a small section on prohibition…

And yes, I may have wept.

Oh…

The horror!

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John Wayne and $40 text messages.

March 7, 2019 Rivergirl 28 Comments

This cute little building was next up on our tour of the Sedona Heritage Museum.

Admittedly it didn’t look like much upon entry.

But then the husband saw this…

And I can’t swear to it, but I think he might have orgasmed right then and there.

Me?

Because as much as I love history, including that of the old west… I despise the old Hollywood westerns. The inaccuracies, the one dimensional characters, the predictable plots? You can have them.

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Yes, I know… it’s unAmerican. So sue me. But the soundtrack to my 35 year marriage has been Rio Bravo, Eldorado, and The Sons of Katie Elder. If I never see another John Wayne movie? I will die a happy woman.

But for the husband to be standing in the actual telegraph office building that was used to shoot The Angel and the Badman?

To walk where Wayne walked?

Yeah, that looks about right.

The studios made a lot of movies in Sedona back in the day, and while the husband was happily reading about the fake west….

I found an early Xerox machine from the real one.

Dare ya to print a copy of your butt on that!

And being a telegraph office, naturally there was telegraph machine.

But holy crap!

I never realized it was so expensive to send a message back then. $40 for a 10 word text? I’d be on the streets in no time flat.

And speaking of the old days…

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Yes sir.

You really had to want it.

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We’re finally there….

March 6, 2019 Rivergirl 32 Comments

Yes, it’s the last full day of the Arizona vacation.

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And to think it only took me 43 blog posts to get here.

Hey, don’t blame me. You’re the ones reading them.

Our day started in an arts and crafts gallery. Sedona is full of them and not one will allow you take pictures.

So here’s a picture.

I saw the framed blessing below and wished I knew someone who was getting married. It would have made a great gift.

Next stop was the Sedona Heritage Museum.

An unassuming little place tucked away in the canyon…

Do ya see the red rocks in the background?

Huh?

Do ya?

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The husband happily strolled around outside and examined rusty things.

There were lots of them.

Including one I could identify but he couldn’t.

Name That Crap.

Go….!

The museum building itself began as a one room cabin and eventually morphed into an early settler’s ranch. It was filled with antiques original to the house, memorabilia and history of a bygone age.

Naturally they wouldn’t let you take pictures.

So here are some pictures.

Yes, that’s part of an authentic chuck wagon from the old west. A piece of tin was folded down from the back and held up by a timber. This acted as the kitchen counter for the camp cook… because really, how much space do you need to make beans?

There were numerous out buildings to tour including this one that was filled with,

Well…

Rusty crap.

But then in the back I saw…

What?

Yes.

The world’s only teal arches.

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I know.

Teal arches.

Remember, you saw it here first.

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Funky trees, metal warrior women and some dinosaur dung.

March 5, 2019 Rivergirl 16 Comments

Tlaquepaque – the sequel.

Trees.

They were everywhere in this quaint shopping village.

And allowed to go pretty much anywhere…

Which was environmentally friendly…

And at times, down right comical.

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There was a strange bird with red peppers on it’s head…

And naked warrior women made out of metal.

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Also with birds.

Tell the truth…. how many of you men actually noticed the bird?

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We walked by Albert again…

And into a store that sold dinosaur poo.

Supposedly authentic… which caused my husband to snort.

Like you could you tell?

The village was lovely.

With a distinct Spanish flavor.

Which probably explains why the French cafe where we had lunch was so absolutely un-French.

It had a slight Gallic atmosphere.

And yes, French Onion soup.

But the closest the menu came to French cuisine was my uninspired, build it yourself chicken salad sandwich on a croissant.

The husband’s?

Might have had Grey Poupon.

Ooh La La Lame.

Finishing our circuit, we stopped at a Native American jewelry store. The prices were high, and though tempted…. I was going to walk out empty handed until the husband started talking.

When the husband starts talking? I know we’re going to be there a while and resumed shopping. Seriously this time.

So it really was his fault I spent a large chunk of change on this bracelet.

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Yup.

His fault.

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On our way out, a giant aloe vera plant threatened to swallow him whole while he gazed at a statue…

No. Not really…

But I totally would have posted that video to YouTube if it had.

Said statue.

Fountain.

Or tiny public bathtub, tough call.

Cat statue, directly opposite a pot filled with….

That can’t be a coincidence.

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Mark Twain, Albert Einstein and an amethyst trouser snake.

March 4, 2019 Rivergirl 20 Comments

Tlaquepaque.

No, I didn’t sneeze…. it’s a place.

Granted it’s designed for tourists with money to burn.

But it’s also a lovely warren of shops and cafes…

And a pleasant place to stroll the day away.

(I think this elk was complaining about his decided lack of fluffy butt.)

I could easily have seen that skull on my living room coffee table…

But no.

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We saw Mark Twain.

And a very relaxed Albert Einstein.

(I wanted my other half to take my picture sitting on his lap and giving him a smooch, but again… uncooperative husband.)

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Most of the shops were outrageously expensive…

And some of them were down right weird.

This one had fake pink stalactites hanging from the ceiling.

As well as …..

This.

I’m sorry.

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But any way you look at it?

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That’s an amethyst penis.

(And a very large one at that.)

And if you think my husband was mortified at the thought of me kissing dear old Albert?

You should have seen his face when I made a point of photographing that semi precious love dart.

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Washouts, floating snakes and a giant potato.

March 3, 2019 Rivergirl 31 Comments

Leaving Winslow, Arizona you see a lot of….

Until you see these…

And start looking for a restaurant here…

We’d heard there was a wonderful place to eat dinner at the Orchard.

Unfortunately…

We didn’t bring our white water landing craft.

This is what happens in Oak Creek Canyon, Arizona when it rains.

And mind you, I’m not talking about torrential downpours. The rain we’d had the night before wouldn’t have been enough to properly soak my garden back home in Maine.

But road after road, and driveway after driveway were impassable.

Except for snakes.

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Apparently those suckers float right on by.

By the time we got back to Sedona it was dark, and we ended up here.

A well reviewed steakhouse.

It was pleasant…

And I was thirsty.

To hell with doctors orders, I’d been a good girl and was feeling fine.

Prickly pear pomegranite cosmo?

Come to momma!

The salads were lovely with fresh local greens, candied pecans, goat cheese and pears with a tangy citrus vinaigrette.

The yeast rolls with sea salt cultured butter? Light as air…

And yes, I ate 3.

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But the steaks?

Ooh la la!

My filet mignon with truffle butter was everything you want a steak to be.

Of course for $52 it should be.

And my baked potato was huge.

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Well, not quite.

But damn…

Now I totally want to go to the potato museum!

Canadian Potato Museum PEI

One of the Top 11 Food Museums in the World!

The Canadian Potato Museum is a living testament to the humble tuber and those who have tilled the soil in its evolution.

We celebrate all things “potato”.

Highlights include the world’s largest exhibits of potato-related farm machinery, agricultural and Community artifacts and the world’s largest potato sculpture.

The world’s largest potato sculpture?

It doesn’t get much better than that!

Who’s with me?

Great!

B.Y.O.P.

(Bring your own peeler)

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A hotel, a rusted camel and some death spoons.

March 2, 2019 Rivergirl 22 Comments

When you visit Winslow, Arizona you have to stand on the corner.

But you also have to visit La Posada…

It’s a sprawling old place, rich with history.

Abandoned for years but now lovingly restored and brought back to life.

Southwest colors and Spanish touches abound.

Including some lovely wrought iron…

And a rusted camel.

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The interior is a bit of a maze…

With arches….

Bright colors…

Elaborate entrance ways…

And room upon room….

Of antiques…

And funky art.

As well as a giant angry chicken.

Because really, what hotel is complete without one?

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The owner is an artist named Tina Mion and her works are scattered throughout the hotel.

Including this mural of suicides.

Yes, you read that correctly.

Take a closer look…

Thinking this was a little odd….

I walked on.

And found these.

Death spoons!

Now you have to admit…

These beat grandma’s Florida gator and Liberty Bell spoons all to Hell!

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Armadillo eggs, mammoth bones… and shoes.

March 1, 2019 Rivergirl 31 Comments

After our disappointing visit to the (guess I’m not so clever after all) corner in Winslow, we noticed there was a local museum down the road. Small town museums are usually a hoot, filled with ridiculous stuff only the locals care about… and we try never to miss one.

But first, lunch.

Because otherwise Martin will unfriend me.

There weren’t a lot of choices in dear old Winslow, so we picked the one that said beer.

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Not that I could drink since my no alcohol order was still in place…but it was probably a good thing, because the beer list was annoying.

Instead of… what?

The beer gets… what?

Fresh orchard like … what?

Open ended sentences do not make me want to order your beer, they make me want to bounce your menu writer’s face off the bar a few times and then force him to finish his description.

And don’t get me started on naming the beers piehole and sex panther. There’s such a thing as trying too hard.

The decor? Early junkyard.

Our hightop table was an upended road sign.

Chipping paint no extra charge.

The menu?

It had the required Eagle references, and some truly awful sounding food.

Armadillo eggs?

Thank you…. No.

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The southwest burger I ordered rare was a well done hockey puck… and just about as tender.

The husband’s Caesar salad? A giant bowl of husks.

Thankfully the museum turned out to be much more palatable.

We were greeted by a local woman who gave us the entire history of the town, whether we wanted it or not.

Once a booming Santa Fe railroad stop, and then a profitable Route 66 destination… the town fell on hard times when families stopped piling the kids in station wagons and hitting the road in search of the World’s Largest Ball of Twine. If it weren’t for the Eagles and their silly song, the place would have dried up and blown away long ago.