Tag Archives: bots

Uncategorized

Here a bot, there a bot…

26 Comments

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While I don’t usually pay a lot of attention to my stats, there are some days I have to.

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Because WordPress likes to announce it when they rise .

“Hey loser! Look at you, people have found your miserable little blog. Kudos.”

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And over the past few days things have definitely been looking up.

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So much so, I got suspicious.

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Yes, the majority were from the U.S…. but still, for me the numbers have been crazy.

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Fearing they were bots…I sent a question to the Happiness Engineers.

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Which, irony of ironies…. was answered by a bot.

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Frank.

Yeah, sure.

Not believing I had suddenly become that popular, I went ahead and changed my WordPress password.

And the very next day?

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Things were back to normal.

🤣

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Uncategorized

Will the real bot please stand up…

25 Comments

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*Title is an archaic reference to a classic game show. Kudos if you know which one.*

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Oh, be quiet.

The point of this blog? WordPress followers. I know most of you probably don’t pay attention to your list, but I do and conduct daily removals of all businesses and bots. I don’t need car insurance, yoga pants, a kale soufflé recipe or a 5 step program to be a better me. This me is as good a me as I’m ever going to get. Someday someone will explain to me why so many of these people/machines feel the need to follow me over and over again.

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Dairy products? Perhaps she/it wants to hug a cow…

Furniture? Clearly someone/thing enjoyed my leather chair shopping saga.

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Same face, three different names and sites. Zap. Zap. Zap.

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And back she/it comes. No matter how many times I delete…

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The next day they’re back.

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So here’s my question.

What are they getting out of this? And why can’t they take the hint?

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Nice try with the alcohol Paula. At least you’re getting to know me better.

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Uncategorized

With apologies to the yoga follower I deleted.

18 Comments

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You know the drill… if you’re a business blog and are trying to sell me something? You’re history.

This goes for the slew of robotic self help sites as well. I’m as good as I’m ever going to get. I’ve accepted that… they should as well.

So yes, I zapped a yoga promoting site that followed me recently… but not before I checked out their page.

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Yoga? No thanks. The days of twisting my body into a pretzel are long gone. The husband isn’t happy about that either…. but what are ya gonna do?

But beer? There’s an exercise routine I fully support.

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Drinking beer and posing? Heck, I’ve been doing that for years!

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Beer.

I always figured it went with everything. But yoga?

Who knew!

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Uncategorized

Because my readers are a high class bunch.

35 Comments

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A new follower is always a lovely thing.

Unless it’s a bot, a business or one of those endless fake blogs I zap on a daily basis.

Last week?

A new follower of the utmost distinction joined my list. There he is, right at the top.

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Yes, The World’s Best Farter has joined our ranks. I’m not sure whether to be flattered or disturbed, but welcome Mr. Farter.

Pull up a chair.

Preferably over there, in the far corner.

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Now admit it…

You’re jealous he found me first.

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Uncategorized

They just don’t take the hint.

20 Comments

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Every single day I zap them.

And every single day they come back.

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I zap business blogs and blogs that don’t exist. I zap bot blogs and blogs that have 100 posts with no comments or likes.

I don’t need inflated follower stats and have no idea why these people, or machines, keep following me.

Can’t they take the hint?

They follow, I zap. Every day. Twice a day. Ad infinitum.

Give it up Car Kudu. Admit defeat Laundry Tips.

You won’t win.

I can out stubborn you…. just ask my husband.

Uncategorized

An open letter to 1800PetsAndVets and Discount Coupons Now….

38 Comments

 

Dear Pets and Coupons,

While I thoroughly applaud your tenacious natures, the madness must stop. Save us both some time and aggravation and cease your current cycle of repetitive following. If you haven’t figured it out by now,  I don’t allow my reader list to be clogged with random businesses, and will continue to zap you on a thrice daily basis.

If you’re people who actually reads my blogs?

Great! Drop a comment so I know there’s a real live human being behind the clicks… and I’ll welcome you aboard.

But Pet, from the look of your page….

 

 

spam

 

You’re a bot and I won’t tolerate those just to juice my numbers… or my ego.

I remove you both every single day. Multiple times…and still, you return.

It’s become a game. Morning Follow… Morning Zap. Afternoon Follow… Afternoon Zap. Evening follow… Evening Zap. Well, I’m getting a little tired of playing.

Let this serve as a warning, I have an infinite amount of patience and will outlast you.

 

C1SuyOJXcAAKZ2-

 

Yup.

That’s me.

So please….

 

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And let me go.

 

Sincerely yours,

Rivergirl