Tag Archives: fuzz

Fuzz… the end.

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And so we reach the end of another series of highlights. I have to say, Mary Roach has really grown on me. I live for weird and wonderful facts and in this respect, she certainly is full of it.

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2×3 = 9,000,000? That is a completely mind boggling statistic. You would think even a rabbit has a headache now and then. Nine million bunnies in 3 years? That’s some serious fornicating my friends.

Sadly the end of the book dealt with all the horrible ways we humans react to what we perceive as an over abundance of wildlife. Simply put…if you get in our way? You’re toast.

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Well, that’s a bit extreme.

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Climate change, loss of habitat, deforestation, pesticides. We kill even when we don’t mean to.

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Seen at the Penguin Place private conservation reserve. The Yellow Eyed Penguin is endanged.

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Another beautiful creature whose time is almost up. Adapt to the damage we wreak upon the planet or perish.

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Neither choice is good. Even if you’re wearing pink go go boots.

😰

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Fuzz…. Part 6.

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Ever wonder why wild creatures are so often run over by cars? The roadkill count in my state is high and I can never figure out why seemingly clever animals always fall victim to large noisy vehicles.

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Mystery solved. Evolution just hasn’t caught up.

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I will now be distributing Cheer detergent to every hunter I know.

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When my husband worked for the Federal Aviation Administration drones were the bane of his existence. I’d love to have one for photography purposes, but his hatred runs deep.

Although this drone?

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Now that’s something special.

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I wonder if it would work for red squirrels…

😈

Fuzz… part 5.

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For my friends of a certain age… did your mother ever force feed you castor oil? If so, be glad it was only a tablespoon and you weren’t on Mussolini’s bad side.

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Next up … a little story on something you should never do to increase sexual pleasure.

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Ouch! Not to mention eww.

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I knew that bitch had military experience! We’re doomed.

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You have to wonder what kind of little boy or girl fantasized about owning a company that specializes in these products. “What do you want to be when you grow up Susie/Sammy?” “A butt paste and douche distributor mommy. It will be so much fun!”

😳

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Fuzz … part 4.

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Have you ever seriously thought about dung? I can’t say I have, but clearly someone is taking note.

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Counting poop pellets? Well, everyone needs a hobby.

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I only have one word for that revelation….

Wow.

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While this graphic of weaponized coconuts is disturbing, one has to wonder why the cartoon father has grabbed mom, stolen junior’s lollipop and left junior to fend for himself.

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I know age has widened my circumference. I feel ya tree.

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Frass. A great word, but as any serious Scrabble player knows…. not worth wasting two S’s. I shall instead whip kerf out on my unsuspecting husband this weekend. K and F? Now you’re talking.

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Fuzz… part 3.

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At the turn of the century, Indian leopards developed a taste for human flesh. (If that’s not a great line to start a blog? I don’t know what is.)

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Pop a hot coal in grandma’s mouth and roll her down the hill? I know India is hot… but that’s cold.

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As much as I love all animals… (and I do! Weirdos like wombats, echidnas, and warthogs? Love ‘em all.) I can not stand monkeys. They’re shifty little bastards and this proves my point.

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Jet propelled ejaculate? Yet another reason to dislike monkeys…

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I’m sure that’s more than you ever wanted to know about jerking off a monkey, but I live to educate.

You’re welcome.

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Religion is a strange thing. When random rats start dropping from the sky? My first thought is not going to be a blessing, I can guarantee you that.

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This is wonderful news. I must move to Britain immediately! Red squirrels are in decline? It sounds like heaven.

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Fuzz… part 2.

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Elephant vs human. Who comes out on top, who’s squished to the depth of a pancake ? Mary travels to India to find out.

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If you know me, you know I had to find that engraving.

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A tad disappointing as dismemberments go, but hey, I tried.

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A shit differential! For 400 lbs a day? I hope it was double overtime equivalent.

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Proof that you can indeed be too drunk.

There’s a large section on elephants in this book including tips on which ones to avoid.

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Sounds like a lot of young males I’ve known.

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The elephant pension plan doesn’t sound too bad. Room and board with daily massages? That’s a damn sight better than Wal Mart I’m sure.

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Fuzz

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Stiff was delightfully bizarre. Gulp was disgusting but fascinating. I admit Spook was a tad disappointing. But now? There’s Fuzz.

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The new Mary Roach book that deals with human animal interaction.

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This book is fun and filled with quirky tidbits I’m going to enjoy sharing. Chapter one finds the author in Canada taking classes with WHART.

WHART. Wildlife-Human Attack Response Training taught by the British Columbia Conservation Officer Service.

First up? Examining mannequins that represent people who were killed/mauled by bear/cougar and trying to determine who did what.

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Ya gotta love Canada.

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Now I’ll never be able to eat a plum without thinking of this. Thanks Mary.

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Tampons. Useful any time of the month apparently.

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Bear print long johns? Geesh. That guy was just asking for it.

There was a large section on bears and bear attacks, which are actually quite rare… so in the interest of public service, I’ll share WHART’s best advice should you ever encounter one in the wild.

If a bear is threat displaying (pawing the ground, huffing) in an effort to intimidate you, it’s a bluff and you should back away slowly while speaking calmly to the animal. Maybe something like, “No worries Mr. Grizzly, this little ole blogger is going to sashay back to her car now and post about her near death experience. Follow my site for an awesome close up of those impressive teeth. Kudos to your dentist by the way, they really are pearly white.”

On the other hand, if the bear is in full predatory attack mode…never run. Open your jacket to look larger, yell, scream, throw rocks, stomp. If the bear starts to charge with his ears flat, you’re the one who needs to look scary. If this happens to me first thing in the morning when I wake up… pre hairdo and makeup? No problem. The bear doesn’t stand a chance.

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