Tag Archives: drones

You know you want one.

 

But we’re the ones who were  cursed by the Lord of Crap  lucky enough to receive a poop drone for Christmas.

 

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I can see you seething….. green with envy.

(Or is it brown in this case?)

 

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Because who hasn’t dreamed of holding a levitating pile of poop in the palm of their hand?

(Okay everyone, including me. But admit it… you’re wondering how utterly horrible truly wonderful it could be.)

Eager to  heave it in the trash  get started, I searched for directions.

 

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There weren’t many… I mean heck, how complicated can poop be?

 

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I admit it was a little disconcerting to have a pile of poop watch me blog.

 

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Especially when it started glowing red.

(Red poop is usually not a good thing…. or so I’ve been told.)

After a short charge, it was ready for a test flight.

And Holy Hell!

That poop can really go.

I was expecting a quiet little puff of air and some marginal movement….

 

 

But that little sucker really takes flight.

And it’s not exactly quiet either…

 

 

Sadly… you can’t control it. The poop has a mind of it’s own.

Which is too bad, because the possible household applications of flying poop are limitless.

Annoying door to door salesmen? Send the drone to answer that incessant knocking.

Unexpected mother in law visit? Program the drone to buzz behind her ear and get twisted in her blue hair as she tells you the proper way to cook her son’s meals.

Neighbor’s dog keeps defecating in your flower bed? When the flying poop rises up behind him he’ll have a heart attack. Problem solved.

Get yours today while supplies last.

Tell ’em River sent you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The after Christmas Christmas… and flying poop.

 

Saturday night found us at our friend’s house… she of the annual weirdo Xmas tree.

 

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By the time we arrived, this year’s forest had sprouted a cat.

 

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There was a small Seussian tree in the dining room…

 

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And shrub Santas by her back door.

 

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The Santas made me smile..

 

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The chipped paint on the steps made me twitch.  (Yes, I literally twitched. The husband had to ask if I was alright.)  **Note to self – buy friend a gallon of paint for her birthday next month**

We drank, had dinner, drank, and exchanged gifts a week late.

 

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Naturally, the exchange made us laugh.

One of my gifts to her is on the left. A crazy lace agate pendant…

 

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One of her gifts to me? On the right….. a crazy lace agate pendant.

This is what happens when you know your friends too well.

And if that wasn’t bad enough?

I gave her husband the new Game of Thrones book…..

 

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Which she then gave to me.

(This was probably funnier after the 3 margaritas and 1 raspberry martini I had, but you get the idea.)

And then….

Then my husband opened one of his gifts.

And I almost fell off the chair.

Remember my recent blog about poop products?

Oh, yes…

 

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We are now the envy of our neighbors and have a Hovering Poop drone of our very own.

 

 

Don’t be jealous.

You know there will be a blog totally devoted to this very soon, and I will share the joy.

Because really.

How can I not?