Have you ever seriously thought about dung? I can’t say I have, but clearly someone is taking note.
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Counting poop pellets? Well, everyone needs a hobby.
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I only have one word for that revelation….
Wow.
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While this graphic of weaponized coconuts is disturbing, one has to wonder why the cartoon father has grabbed mom, stolen junior’s lollipop and left junior to fend for himself.
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I know age has widened my circumference. I feel ya tree.
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Frass. A great word, but as any serious Scrabble player knows…. not worth wasting two S’s. I shall instead whip kerf out on my unsuspecting husband this weekend. K and F? Now you’re talking.
The Maine state government has finally gotten around to taxing your dog’s balls.
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Beware “fully equipped” friends.
You could be next.
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I had to do a double take on this one. Although holiday poop gift ideas wouldn’t be an odd addition to my news feed at this point… that’s actually actually a shrimp poop removing tool.
And who doesn’t want to find one of those in their stocking Christmas morning?
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2020 is my husband.
While I carry a washable cloth mask in my purse, he uses those blue paper things and I find them hanging everywhere. Rear view mirror, stick shift, hat rack, door knobs etc.
Some years, if we’re not traveling… we spend Christmas Day with friends. They tend to have less emotional baggage than family, and are generally a lot more fun. Of course last year, Covid ruined everything about the holidays and we neither traveled nor made merry with friends. Boo to global pandemics! They’re such a buzz kill.
Our friends, being fun loving (as well as gift greedy) have decided to celebrate 2020’s lost holiday in July. (It will be a barbecue/pool party at our friend’s newly purchased house/horse farm/how the Hell is a 50 something single woman going to take care of this huge spread by herself.)
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We’ve been invited and encouraged to get into the Christmas in July spirit…. so naturally I will be wearing this:
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Because nothing says Ho! Ho! Ho! like Santa in a mankini.
I will also be bringing this:
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A Covid themed piñata, so we can all take our frustrations over the past year out on something other than our spouses.
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Yes. To all of that. And I won’t be filling it with candy, no. In honor of the shit show that was 2020 I will fill it with these:
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What are those you ask? Only the perfect gift to give your friends in case certain items become hard to find again.
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Portable toilet paper! Am I a genius or what?
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And to further get into the Christmas spirit? I’ve purchased this 2020 totally went down the drain themed tree.
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I did not however purchase the accompanying ornaments.
You never know what serious news stories will be discussed on my town’s Facebook page. The economy? Yes. Climate change? Sure. But I live in Maine…. so likely as not? It will be this:
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Bear poop beats the G-7 Summit any day.
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The conversation got heated and had to be removed by admin. We take our poo identification seriously up here.
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Now that’s my kind of neighbors.
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Someone is selling peony blossoms for $3 a pop?
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Woot!
I’m going to be rich.
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I’ve read that the cost of rental cars had gone up, but $3,000 for a week?
River's world..... 