Tag Archives: texas

For the love of all that’s holy… no.

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What the Hell Texas!

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Loyal readers know I dislike dolls. Those dead eyed, soul stealing little human replicants have haunted my dreams for decades. So when I read about the abominations washing up on shore in Texas?

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I cringed.

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Figuratively and literally.

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The thought of casually strolling down the beach and bumping my toe into that makes me want to scream.

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Thirty.

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Of those…. things.

😱

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Thank you John. You’re doing the world a great service.

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Burn them.

Burn them all…..

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Let’s play.

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Stop grumbling. I know you like these things ….

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I am in Deaf Smith County Texas. The hill country… which I’m assured can be quite beautiful.

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And while I love James Lee Burke’s Louisiana detective Robicheaux series, the Texas Billy Bob Holland series doesn’t quite measure up for me.

And considering their political climate of restricting voting rights and a woman’s right to chose?

Texas is probably not the best place for me to wake up right now.

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Random claptrap.

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Have you ever tried this?

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I found it last week and it isn’t half bad. Apparently smashing citrus fruit and mixing it with vodka is a Maryland crab bake tradition.

This next one is all I’m going to say about the travesty happening in Texas. Because common sense is common sense, and if men were the ones who got pregnant? There would be clinics on every street corner.

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Have you ever felt like you just aren’t accomplishing enough?

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There.

I feel better already.

And finally, it’s never too early to start that Christmas knitting.

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It’s that time again…

 

 

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Let’s begin.

1.  John Quincy Adams went skinny dipping in the Potomac on his 79th birthday.

 

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If this mental image has to be stuck in my head?

I want it to be stuck in yours as well.

 

2.  After eating, the common housefly regurgitates it’s food and eats it again.

Because sometimes, pizza is just that good.

 

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3.  Charlie Brown’s father is a barber.

Admit it, you never knew that.

You’re welcome.

 

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4.  A barnacle has the largest penis of any other animal in relation to it’s size.

Oddly enough, this is a question that’s rarely asked in trivia games.

And Lord knows, I’ve been waiting to dazzle crowds with my barnacle member dimension knowledge for years.

 

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5.   There’s a town in Texas called Ding Dong.

Truly, there is.

It’s north of Austin.

 

DingDongTX

 

And I have a question for Texas bloggers…

WTH?

 

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I’m all for being proud of your home town, but….

Damn.

 

 

 

Let’s talk about Spam….

 

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I have to admit, WordPress’s spam catcher is pretty effective.

Although, come on….

 

jhgyeuwi

 

They could have let that through.

So it never ceases to amaze me how many people and companies keep trying. I mean, yes… practice makes perfect.  And kudos to them for their tenacity, but today I had 33 spam messages trapped.

33.

6 of them from the pretty guinea pig.

Buy Amoxil 500mg Amoxicillin http://theprettyguineapig.com/amoxicillin/

Who clearly thinks I need an antibiotic.

 

987456512321

 

Damn…

That’s a disturbing thought.

Then there’s this cryptic example.

Research – good research is significant to buying
a reliable dress. With the drive comes the need of creation. It is unachievable
to “make” others happy, in but the. That is, as long as you follow that will. http://pro-social.ru/bitrix/redirect.php?event1=&event2=&event3=&goto=http://aidanharris.com/__media__/js/netsoltrademark.php%3Fd=cuci.today

 

While I agree buying the right dress may require a little extra effort…

 

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They lost me with  “It is unachievable
to “make” others happy, in but the. That is, as long as you follow that will.”

Maybe making others happy in the but is achievable.

Don’t scoff, everyone needs a life goal.

I was a little disappointed to see this flagged as Spam –

 

Frank
Frank

20 hours ago·

tunklitankli.com

Your site has exceptional content. I bookmarked the site

 

Because hey –

 

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This one surprised me –

taylor swift 22 live billboard
taylor swift 22 live billboard

It is often a fast-paced, high-risk trading option that potentially
gives substantial returns. This mentality will
absolutely move you killed.

 

Taylor Swift wants to kill me if I move?

 

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Yeah, well… bite me Taylor.

You can’t keep a boyfriend and I’ve been married 35 years. Hope your Grammys keep you warm at night.

Then there are the never ending, non stop online casino ads.

These spammers are dedicated. Once they find you? They don’t let go…. but that’s okay. Because yes, they do make me laugh.

Texas hold em poker has slip on huge around turmoil.

 

Texas has huge slip ons?

 

 

920x920

 

That’s just wrong.

 

“…this is nonetheless not preferable to gamble by having an above exhausted head.”

Agreed.

I hate having an above exhausted head.

 

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..”When asked for advice, the nice I could offer was for him to continue
playing Gin using wife.”

I’m no marriage expert, but the only type of gin I want my husband to be playing with is this:

 

hACEDEBBA

 

 

And finally…

“Did the enemy team get Baron due to the fact nobody on the own group warded this?
Did an enemy stroll into five of yourself and pass on? Every tiny mistake needs for famous to create certain you can study.
To fail to Do that a lot of.”

Yes, the enemy team got Baron Trump, because really… who wants to deal with that dad on the sidelines?

I don’t remember the enemy strolling in and passing on. Let me ask my 4 other personalities and get back to you.

But…. help me out here. What does every tiny mistake need?

Even I can’t unpack that one.