Tag Archives: cats

Clearly, I’m doing it wrong.

 

I have an iPhone.

 

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( If you don’t watch Game of Thrones? Never mind)

And with the iPhone comes Apple news, which I check from time to time for breaking stories.

And may I just say…. what’s passing for news these days is beyond ridiculous.

 

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Roll over Edward R. Murrow,  it’s a Kardashian filled world now.

And they want everyone to see their butts.

 

 

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This picture was in my news feed.

Why? I have no idea.

But it made me realize…

Damn.

I’ve been doing Sundays wrong for years.

 

 

Have you ever done this?

 

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I know better, and yet…..

Stomach rumbling, I sashay up and down the aisles tossing  HoHo’s and Ring Dings in my shopping cart at will.

(If they called them Cellulite Starters and Butt Wideners I wouldn’t, so you see…. it’s really not my fault.)

I buy salad tossers I’ll never toss, fizzy fruited drinks I’ll never drink and worst of all…. more deli meat and cheese than a school cafeteria will use in a month.

Oh, the pressure of the deli counter!

You take a number, wait in line, peruse the 307 varieties of flavored sliced turkey breast and when it’s finally your turn? You can’t just order a 1/4 lb of roast beef and call it good…. can you?

(Well I can’t. Which is why you should all come to my house for lunch tomorrow. BYOB. Bring your own bread…. because I never seem to buy the correct corresponding amount.)

And the paper products!

Why can’t I ever remember if I need them? I always buy too many which results in episodes like this:

 

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Note to self –

Never leave the closet door ajar when you’ve purchased too much Charmin.

 

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To say he enjoyed it would be an understatement.

 

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The beast was positively orgasmic.

And none too eager to relinquish his prize as I cleaned up around him.

 

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Moral of the story?

Buying too much at the grocery store can not only be wasteful and expensive….

But bloody as well.