Tag Archives: fruit

Time Traveler Part 3

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Let’s word.

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My birth year seems to have been full of scientific additions that mean absolutely nothing to me.

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But dragon fruit? I had a martini made from those once and it was lovely.

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Elevator music? Great, the next time Barry Manilow comes on at the mall everyone will blame me.

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Fetal position? I’m ashamed to say I have assumed that after a night of too many martinis…. and it was far from lovely.

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Hotdog? Now that I think about it my mother always called them frankfurters. Maybe she was a Rocky Horror Picture Show fan after all.

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And finally Japanese quail, which now that I think about it…. looks a little bit like me after a years worth of non stop Covid lockdown cooking and eating.

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She’s a clever little b*tch.

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Before the snow fell, our resident rodent pest from Hell. red squirrel was busy.

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Stealing seed from the birds and apples from the deer.

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Seeds were stuffed in every conceivable hole and our deck looked like a fruit salad exploded.

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But after the first snow storm?

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She was a happy camper.

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And remembered most of her stash spots.

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Im sure that fruit tasted good.

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She’s annoying.

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But clever.

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Natural?

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I’m all about trying new household products.

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A natural grapefruit scented cleaner? With a pamplemousse translation?

Bring it!

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Okay, no unicorns is a tad disappointing… but it smelled great and worked quite well.

Until the day I used it to wipe down our smooth surface stovetop and then turned on a burner.

Holy craparoni! The lovely fruity smell went from delightful wafts of citrus to noxious room clearing fumes in no time flat.

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And upon further examination the oh so natural ingredients were anything but.

I read sodium gluconate is derived from plants, but it doesn’t sound like I’m going to be picking it off a tree in a pesticide free orchard anytime soon. Turns out it’s the sodium salt of gluconic acid.

Blech!

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Blog number one thousand two hundred twenty whatever, where River chases turkeys.

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Wild turkeys. They’re comical and I love to watch them…

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But then they discovered my deer grain pans.

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I chased them, but half heartedly and with ridiculously cringe worthy baby talk.

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But they’re turkeys, so as soon as I walked in the house and looked out the window? This.

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So I chased them again. And that time they stayed gone for an hour… just long enough for me to put out the nightly deer snack.

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While I don’t mind them coming to eat the dropped bird seed and assorted Casa River insects, they’ve figured out the buffet of deer grain, fruit and fox food is laid out at 3:00pm and this might be a problem.

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She’s baaaack.

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I thought maybe we’d seen the last of her.

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But no, she was out back stealing chopped up deer apples yesterday.

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She was back on the patio table.

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And there’s only one reason for that. Do you know how sick and tired I am of finding small pieces of rotted apple every time I sit down?

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And then of course there’s the poo.

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She leaves it there on purpose, I know it.

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And may I just say, sipping from puddles of rain water filled with your own poo?

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Not the least bit appetizing.

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And please note… in that last picture? She is literally pooping. Am I a great photo journalist or what!

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My first one is a live pear.

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I don’t know about you, but I never have anything pop up in the ‘search terms’ box of my stats page…. until now.

I was excited! What was someone looking for when they arrived at my page… Chickens? Rocks? Rodent rebellions? It could be anything.

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New live pears?

What the…

What?

This required a Google search of my own.

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The Grisly Pear and… zombies.

No, that can’t be right.

Let’s try again.

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Okay, a giant lau lau is strange enough…

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But a waterproof bullet vibrator?

What the utter F!

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CSA and a few grocery store chuckles.

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This week’s bounty was a large one.

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Tomato, squash, radishes, zucchini, beets, parsley, celery, lettuce, Italian green beans, spinach and basil.

What it didn’t have was any of the bizarre little jewels the farm advertised at their stand.

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Mouse melons.

I want!

What I didn’t want was the truck I parked behind at the grocery store telling me to eat more kale.

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I’m not eating any kale, and you can’t make me.

Inside the store, this item looked interesting.

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I like beer.

I like butterscotch.

But then I noticed it was non alcoholic cream soda and screamed false advertising.

You shouldn’t tease customers like that. Especially during a pandemic.

You also shouldn’t display things like this:

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And not expect bloggers to take pictures and chortle over how utterly wrong they look.

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CSA and grocery store weirdos.

 

Swiss chard, celery, onion, basil, radishes, carrots, dill, scallions, tomato, pepper and something I’d never tried before.

A Korean melon.

 

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It’s a delicate flavor, like cantaloupe… with the consistency of a cucumber.

At the store this week –

 

 

A clearance sale on Hostess coffee.

Poor SnoBalls.

Apparently no one likes them in caffeinated liquid form either.

 

 

Italian flour.

WTH?

Do the Irish and French have some as well. And if so, why?

 

 

Gag.

More meatless meat. This time in balls.

So wrong.

 

 

And yes, the brand name toilet paper was still on the shelves.

But right across the aisle?

 

Not a Brawny or Bounty in sight.

Thirsty paper towels?

Trust me, they’re anything but.

Blue Monday.

 

We’re extremely blue at Casa River.

 

 

And loving every minute of it.

 

 

Our bushes are full of ripe fruit and we can’t pick fast enough.

 

 

The neighbors get a bowl.

The postman gets a bowl.

If y’all lived closer, you’d get a bowl as well.

 

 

After picking, it was time to dig out my favorite blueberry recipes.

 

 

The coffee cake was wonderful.

 

 

Bursting with fat juicy fruit.

 

 

Unfortunately, the cobbler didn’t cobble.

 

 

The berries were so big the batter didn’t squeeze up through, but sat at the bottom and made cake instead.

Of course, now that I think about it….

 

 

There’s nothing wrong with upside down cobbler.

It still tastes fabulous.

So if you care to share your favorite recipe…. I’m all ears.

And blue fingers.

 

For Boo, as requested.

 

 

A blue bounty.

 

We’ve been having an unusually hot dry summer so I was a little worried our blueberry harvest would be small.

 

 

But the bushes are positively laden with fruit.

 

 

And in some places, look like grapes.

 

 

We did our first picking the other day…

 

 

And I see pie in our future.

 

 

As well as coffee cake, crumble, lemon blueberry pound cake, buckle and muffins.

If we can beat these little bastards to the berries that is.

 

 

No one wants pancakes that squirm.