Tag Archives: kale

Let’s play.

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You know you want to.

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I hate to say it, but the first thing that came to my mind when I read this?

Humans. The planet would be a far better, greener place without us. Goes without saying my blog stats would drop dramatically, but it’s a small price to pay.

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On a lighter note, there’s one simple answer for me.

Kale. The sooner we rid the world of this noxious weed the better…

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No kale crackers, no kale chips and for the love of all that’s holy… no kale ice cream.

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🤮

How about you? What do you want to banish from earth….

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That’s just wrong.

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Food. It nourishes our bodies and delights our taste buds, but sometimes? It can go horribly wrong.

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Oh no, Hell no! That nasty kale leaf will never sneak in and infect my brownies. Nope. Not on my watch.

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I only have one word for this disturbing platter of homicidal fruit.

Run! Some of those berries look positively demented.

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Easter. A day of religious celebration, fuzzy bunnies and most importantly – chocolate. And while I always thought I’d take my Easter chocolate any old way I could get it… I find eating eggs out of a rabbit’s ass to be the one line I can’t cross. ( And no, I’m not mentioning the wooden mallet you apparently use to open that ass. Nope. That’s a road I don’t care to travel )

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A prune juice mocktail. I’ll just leave that thought for further consideration.

🤢

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No! Not the children..

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It’s well established that I am not a fan of that horrible green leaf called kale.

I don’t like kale chips or drink kale smoothies, so stop asking.

I won’t eat it and you can’t make me, no matter how constant the bombardment.

So imagine my horror when I saw the advertisement for this abomination of a product….

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No!

Not the children!

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A kale chew toy?

Wouldn’t that be more suited for a dog?

What the utter Hell!

😳

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I love my town.

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You never know what’s going to turn up on my little town’s Facebook page. It could be relevant community news….

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Or not.

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Our UPS guy totally rocks. He leaves dog biscuits for all the canine residents whether they’re barking at him or not.

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See? You can’t even give that stuff away.

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If there are synchronized dancing peppers wearing sombreros? I’m totally going next week.

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Magazine musings…

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Since I’m still trying to plow through my massive stack of magazines, I have to share.

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Do we really need shoes that breathe? I don’t… but maybe that’s just me.

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I’m all for alternative leather products… eucalyptus? Cool. But if they come up with kale filled seats? I’m boycotting on sheer principle.

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According to this map temperatures are rising almost everywhere but it looks like me and my hot flashes are in the right place. Hang in there Maine! River melts into a puddle in anything above 75 degrees.

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If you’ve never had canned brown bread you haven’t lived a full life. This is a Maine staple, made in Portland, Maine… so why this article calls it Boston brown is a mystery. Moist and filled with molasses?

Try it. Your mouth will thank me.

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Dexter is coming back!

I don’t have Showtime anymore but might have to resubscribe in order to revisit my favorite serial killer.

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Ghost pepper strawberry frosting?

No.

Just no.

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CSA and a few grocery store chuckles.

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This week’s bounty was a large one.

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Tomato, squash, radishes, zucchini, beets, parsley, celery, lettuce, Italian green beans, spinach and basil.

What it didn’t have was any of the bizarre little jewels the farm advertised at their stand.

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Mouse melons.

I want!

What I didn’t want was the truck I parked behind at the grocery store telling me to eat more kale.

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I’m not eating any kale, and you can’t make me.

Inside the store, this item looked interesting.

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I like beer.

I like butterscotch.

But then I noticed it was non alcoholic cream soda and screamed false advertising.

You shouldn’t tease customers like that. Especially during a pandemic.

You also shouldn’t display things like this:

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And not expect bloggers to take pictures and chortle over how utterly wrong they look.

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CSA and grocery store horrors.

 

This week’s offering from our CSA was a little lean on our end because there were a lot of things we don’t eat and elected to let our neighbor take.

 

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Cilantro, bok choi, kale, turnips, spigarello, fennel, and kohlrabi? We passed.

But the chard was rainbow colored…

 

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So there is that.

And in the continuing saga of bizarre grocery items found on my local shelves…..

 

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Every possible mutation of pasta imaginable are still being pushed.

 

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As is the ever present  (and still disgusting)  kale.

Delicious? I doubt it.

Crazy good? Not possible.

Stop the insanity and put kale back where it belongs…. in a rabbit’s colon. Other than the trash can, that’s the only proper place.

 

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Thankfully there was one sane product line of which I took full advantage.

 

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Let the grilling begin.