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Naming a new pet isn’t a difficult process, at least for me.
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I’ve always been able to spend a little time with them and discover their rightful names. Like Lord Dudley Mountcatten.
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It just came to me, and to be honest, I think it suits him perfectly.
My husband disagrees. And of all the pets we’ve ever had, this is the one name he refuses to use.
Does the Royal title put him off? Perhaps.
Is it too much of a mouthful? Maybe.
But as I keep telling him, it could have been worse.
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I dislike cutsie.
My house is not filled with smiling cherub chotchkies or puppy angel geegaws. I do not post overly sweet photos of newborn babies reclining in hollowed out pumpkins.
So it should come as no surprise that I’m not a fan of nauseatingly precious named products.
If you have a pet odor remover? Say so….
Don’t get cute.
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This goes for crap collectors…
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Dog litter…
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And pet bathing hoses.
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Rinseroo?
I feel a cavity coming on just reading these.
But the worst?
This answer to the question Who’s your daddy?
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Pet fur is not the correct answer.
No.
It’s not even close….
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No, I haven’t run out of these yet.
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Hmm… Black Haddock has possibilities.
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And it’s better than yesterday’s… Blue HoHo.
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That’s easy….
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I know it’s a staple of childhood sandwiches and a good source of protein as an adult, but I completely despise the stuff. The mere smell of it makes me nauseated. I don’t care if you cover it in chocolate… I’m not eating it.
Nope.
Uh uh.
Never.
And if my husband comes at me with that nasty nut breath? I’m not kissing him either.
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Stop rolling your eyes. It’s not painful… and they make me chuckle.
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I’ll start.
My drag Queen name is…. Julianna Creme Horn. Which, when you think about it… couldn’t be more appropriate.
🤣
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Or a Dik Dik as the case may be.
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Ever since I bought Poetry for Neanderthals from Facebook ( which we still haven’t played because Covid has killed game night with friends ) I’ve been getting ads. Some are interesting, some are ridiculous. I think this one falls into the latter category.
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And while I’m sure having a handful of Slippery Dicks can be delightful, I think I’m probably going to pass on this one.
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I’d like to think my sense of humor is a tad more advanced.
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Though I am blogging about this… so the point might be moot.
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Ready?
Let’s play!
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And for the sake of equality, let’s add ‘or penis’ to the instructions.
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Yes, I’m afraid we are. Here, I’ll go first.
The name of my vagina is…. Homeland.
Which you have to admit is pretty damn spectacular.
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In case you’re wondering why….
Who are you?
River's world..... 