My Facebook and Apple News algorithms are always coming up with ridiculous products they think I need to purchase.
I’m passing on all three of these.
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#1…. Swimsuit season is not approaching quickly in Maine, unless you count the Polar Bear plunge in February and I’ve never be crazy enough to do that.
#2…. My derrière is awake as it’s ever going to get. No caffeinated butt cream required. 
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No.
Just… no.
While I spoil Lord Dudley Mountcatten far more than my husband thinks I should, even I have limits.
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Do I want to carry around a 28 ounce gelatinous pouch of my own urine? I most assuredly do not.
Also, I spent my teenage years on an island in Maine where there were no public restrooms. I’m completely familiar with pissing in the woods if necessary.
These strange discs were lined up on the parade ground so the husband had to investigate.
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Having had my fill of stairs that day, I let him.
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Turns out they were storage vaults for ammunition.
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Alongside of that wall was a room with a broken water line that fed from a 27,000 gallon cistern…
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And next to that…
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A room with a giant rock. Because who doesn’t love that?
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The officer’s quarters were far from luxurious. Geesh, look at that lumpy mattress.
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But as cold and damp as Maine can be, at least they had a fireplace.
Now let’s take a strange turn here shall we?
Please note the mock up of a Revolutionary War officer seated on the right and the blanket draped over his chair. I wanted a better look at him and took this untouched photo from his other side.
After visiting the Penobscot Narrows bridge observatory, we turned our attention to Maine’s largest historic fort which is literally right next door.
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Fort Knox, named after General Henry Knox, America’s first Secretary of War and Commander of Artillery in the Revolution. He spent his final years just down the road in Thomaston. And yes, that other Fort Knox in Kentucky is named after him as well.
The first thing we saw upon entering the Fort’s grounds?
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Proof!
I’m guessing this was a Halloween decoration as they host a big event here for the holiday. Or rather, I’m hoping.
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The Fort sits on a peninsula jutting out into the Penobscot River and was deemed the perfect defensive spot in 1844. Almost a million dollars was spent on its construction, but it took Congress 25 years to allot those funds and as with most government run projects, it was never actually completed.
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But no matter, it’s still an impressive place.
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More Halloween decorations, which to be honest annoyed the photographer in me.
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Yeah, Stephen King rules. We get it.
A diagram of the fort.
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The minute you enter through the sally port you’re struck by how well designed this was.
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The granite was local and expertly fitted.
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Inside? It’s all about the canons.
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Small cannons.
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And Big Bertha ass cannons.
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You know every single child ignores that sign.
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Room after room of cannons. Two floors and four batteries contain mounts for 135 of those babies but only 74 were ever brought to the site. Not as many as it could hold, but that still requires a lot of balls. In more ways than one.
Do you have a bucket list for your own state? Mine is long and varied because somehow we never find the time to see the wonderful things in our own backyard… or in this case, the yard two hours away.
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But last week I checked this off. The tallest bridge observatory in the world.. which just happens to have Maine’s fastest elevator. Good thing too, my knee would never survive a staircase 420 feet up.
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The construction of this cable stayed bridge was big news in these parts and people anxiously looked forward to its completion. Started in 2004, completed and opened Dec. 30, 2006. And yes, we’re more than a little late to the party.
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I’m not sure the pictures do it justice, but trust me it’s quite something.
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Was my bad knee happy there were a few flights of stairs after we got off the elevator? No….
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But I sucked it up and climbed.
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And the 360 degree view was worth it.
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Sam Champlain was here.
Suck on that Kilroy.
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I’m including a video that has an annoying reflection of me throughout. Try to ignore that and enjoy the view…
I don’t know if you remember, but last year I posted about a giant rubber duck that appeared out of nowhere in the harbor of a Maine town. No one knew where it came from or who deployed it… but everyone loved it and reported sightings with gleeful enthusiasm.
Now?
It’s back…. and yeah. Bigger and better than ever. 
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Last year it said “Joy”, this year it’s “ Greater Joy”.
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A random floating giant rubber duck is a beautiful thing.
River's world..... 