Tag Archives: annoying

Enough already.

.

It rained again, in January, in Maine. That’s not supposed to happen. Most years we’re positively buried in snow.

.

.

And I have to say I’d much rather be doing this…

.

.

Than dealing with this…

.

.

It rained…. and our roof sprung yet another leak.

.

.

In yet another brand new spot. Every time the husband thinks he’s fixed it? It leaks somewhere else. And while the temperature has been mild (for us) it’s still not warm enough to strip and replace a roof. So while we wait for spring and pray for snow, our ceiling is being ruined. I’ve bleached this 3 times …

.

.

And it still bleeds through.

Kill me now.

.

This bitch has got to go.

.

Every Sunday night I kick the husband off the big tv in the living room and stay up late binge watching a bunch of recorded series. I don’t watch a lot of television, but I am addicted to a few HBO, Starz and Showtime programs that my other half hates.

So Monday is the one morning I sleep past 5:00am… and I relish my extra 2 hours. But this Monday morning? I was woken by a noise.

Scratching. And banging. Then more scratching.

I grumbled, I stumbled, I got out of bed and I found this….

.

.

The red squirrel bitch from Hell. She had scaled the bush alongside the house and was scrambling up and down the screen, over and over. And then?

.

.

She just hung there.

Taunting me.

.

.

That bitch has got to go.

.

She doesn’t give up.

.

Neither snow nor rain… nor frigid temperatures will stop the red squirrel from Hell.

.

IMG_8168

.

She was scurrying over the roof and across the deck railing…

.

IMG_8172

.

Trying to make her way to the seed buffet.

.

IMG_3845

.

But this snow was light, fluffy and thick and every time she tried to walk across it?

.

IMG_3839

.

She fell through.

.

IMG_3829

.

And yes, I laughed my rapidly expanding, thank you Covid 19 ass off.

.

IMG_3841

.

But she had the last laugh.

.

.

Because the bitch has learned to tunnel.

.

IMG_3835

.

She tunneled for over an hour.

.

IMG_3842

.

Back and forth.

.

IMG_3847

.

Building an entire red squirrel subway line.

.

IMG_3834

.

This doesn’t bode well for my dream of her dying of starvation over the winter.

.

IMG_3843

.

Or the safety of our home’s foundation for that matter.

.

IMG_3848

.

If I wake up next month with her sitting at the kitchen table nibbling my Krispy Kreme’s? Things are going to get real.

.

Well… time told.

.

And I don’t like what it had to say.

.

.

Not one damn bit.

Sadly after all the roofing repairs my husband and his friends did the other day… nothing changed.

It’s still leaking.

.

.

So we went back up in the attic and realized the wood and shingles they replaced the other day probably weren’t high enough up on the roof.

.

.

So now our ceiling looks even worse.

.

.

And though he thinks he knows where to make the next repair?

.

.

It was on the day our first N’or Easter started blowing in… so I doubt it will be anytime soon.

.

.

Meanwhile back at the ranch…

.

While all the frenzied work in the barn has been consuming my husband’s mind and time?

.

.

This was happening inside our house.

.

.

Yet another roof leak.

.

.

We have walked the roof.

We have climbed into the attic.

We have replaced our chimney insert.

We have tarred, caulked, shingled, flashed and yes, swore repeatedly…. but still can’t figure out where it’s coming in.

.

.

Back in ’94 before we owned the home, a bump out addition was added to the living room…

.

.

And what I’m assuming is a load bearing beam… is where the rain always breaks through.

.

.

It’s beyond aggravating.

.

.

Not to mention ugly.

So back in the attic crawl space we went. Of course this means all the husband’s junk must be vomited from the den closet first.

.

.

And there’s a lot of junk.

.

.

Anyone need some slightly dated reading material?

.

.

This time the attic investigation revealed two possible spots on the roof where water could be getting in. Husband is guessing 3 squares of shingles will have to be replaced. But winter is upon us, and it’s not going to be a pleasant task.

Wish us luck.

.

.

She’s persistent, I’ll give her that.

.

Alternate title : The Bitch is Back.

.

IMG_3577

.

Still on our roof.

.

IMG_3578

.

Still trying to chew her way back into our house.

.

IMG_3572

.

Look at her.

.

IMG_3579

.

Taunting me.

.

IMG_3574

.

We’ve sealed up every entry point we can find.

.

IMG_3576

.

But she keeps looking.

.

IMG_3575

.

Did I laugh when she scrambled on top of the gutter, slipped and fell in the downspout?

Damn right I did.

.

She’s baaaack.

.

I thought maybe we’d seen the last of her.

.

IMG_3303

.

But no, she was out back stealing chopped up deer apples yesterday.

.

IMG_3306

.

She was back on the patio table.

.

IMG_3352

.

And there’s only one reason for that. Do you know how sick and tired I am of finding small pieces of rotted apple every time I sit down?

.

IMG_3356

.

And then of course there’s the poo.

.

IMG_3357

.

She leaves it there on purpose, I know it.

.

IMG_3337

.

And may I just say, sipping from puddles of rain water filled with your own poo?

.

IMG_3338

.

Not the least bit appetizing.

.

And please note… in that last picture? She is literally pooping. Am I a great photo journalist or what!

.

Oh FFS.

.

My hatred for the new editor abated slightly when I played with it on my computer the other day.

I scheduled some critter posts filled with pictures and thought alright, I don’t love it… but I can pull up my big girl panties and deal.

Until I tried to edit one of them on my phone today.

.

.

What?

The picture was there in the scroll….

.

.

But when I opened the post it basically said F you.

.

.

Yeah.

so I’m back to hating it again.

It’s a simple concept.

 

Trips to the grocery store are so much more interesting these days.

And by interesting, I mean annoying A.F.

Take for example… the ample directional signage.

 

IMG_3764 (2)

 

Since I am a fully functioning literate adult, I read this and my brain processes the instruction quite quickly.

For those unlucky souls who don’t possess my lightning quick reasoning? There was also this helpful accompaniment.

 

IMG_3764

 

Pretty straight forward, right?

Then why…. on every single aisle I traversed…. did I have to dodge customers coming straight at me? Many without the facial covering the store… and now this particular town…. requires.

Regardless whether you’re on board with the whole mask, social distancing, 6 feet apart regime…. it’s this grocery store’s policy and they’re doing it to try and keep you safe. You don’t have to shop there, but if you do? Please pay attention… and study those pesky one syllable directions.

I’d hate to inadvertently (on purpose) stick my foot out as you pass by.