Tag Archives: humor

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My Planet… part three.

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More relatable Mary Roach humor.

While I can’t get on board with the jewelry part, I’ve had more than a few cocker spaniel days.

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Oh, who are we kidding? I’ve had cocker spaniel months.

This next page deals with searching for a new home and open houses.

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I used to love to tour open houses, just because. Not that I ever bought any, it’s just a fun way to spend the day.

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So you know I had to…

Some dogs looked happy.

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Some dogs did not.

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Cats? Apparent they rate toast collars.

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But hands down? The winner goes to three olive martini beagle.

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It will serve his owner right to get poked in the eye with that toothpick.

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I doubt even Judy Garland would be wild about this Harry.

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I have not, nor do I ever intend to read Prince Harry’s book, Spare. While part of me feels sorry for the guy growing up in a cold as ice household and losing his mother when young…. I have no desire to plumb the depths of the royal family’s secrets and peak behind the curtain of the modern monarchy.

It seems everywhere you turn people are talking about this book and while it’s been easy enough to ignore, one article the other day caught my eye … and when that happens? You know I have to share.

Here are a few of the more… how shall we say…colorful excerpts from the infamous book.

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Did the press write extensively about the Royal penis? Gee. I’m glad I missed that.

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You know what? I did ‘shrooms back in the day and never talked to a toilet. Myself? Yes. But then I’m a better conversationalist than most commodes. Or so I’ve been told.

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Not talking about your frostbitten todger at all would have been preferable.

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Sent him off to graze? How delightful.

🥴

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And we’re shifting….

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The husband completed his work on the far left corner of the crap filled dungeon cellar and has now shifted to the far right.

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The ceiling was up…

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And painted…

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And insulation folded into place.

I had to laugh because it was at this point he said, “Looks a lot different without all the stuff here huh?” And yes, technically he’s right … it did look different. But I’d be a lot more thrilled if the stuff migrated out of the cellar and to the dump instead of just shifting over to the newly completed section.

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What’s the point in having a nicely cleaned, insulated, ceiling’d cellar if you can’t actually see it?

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Finally!

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This winter season started off with a whimper. No snow, warm temps and entirely too much rain. But the other day?

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The sky started looking angry… and before I blinked?

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We had our first few inches that stuck.

And yesterday?

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An all day storm that really racked up the white stuff. I loved it, but our backyard birds probably disagreed.

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Poor little things. Their feet have to be cold.

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It came down for a solid 13 hours and now it finally feels like winter!

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Guess we won’t be grilling out for a while.

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How much did we get? About a foot, which was enough for our farming neighbor to come plow us out with his tractor last night.

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I love our community.

I love our state.

I love winter!

❄️ ❤️ ❄️

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News you can’t use.

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Because the world is a ridiculous place.

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This does not surprise me in the least.

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Men have been obsessed with their one eyed trouser snake since the dawn of time, and now we have proof.

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Why this particular fellow thought his penis would be an appropriate weapon against a charging leopard…. I’m sure I don’t know.

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I can just hear the hippo now… “needs salt”.

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And in case you’re in the mood to let the girls run free?

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Get thee to Cape Cod and jump on a ferry.

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Nantucket winters can be a bit brisk, so be careful you don’t take anyone’s eye out with a quick turn.

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Now there’s something you don’t see everyday.

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Because I really need another time sucking app.

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Are you familiar with Goodreads?

I wasn’t, but now I’m addicted.

Goodreads is the world’s largest site for readers and book recommendations. Our mission is to help people find and share books they love.

Find and read more books you’ll love, and keep track of the books you want to read. Be part of the world’s largest community of book lovers on Goodreads.

Being a voracious reader, I had to join. Once you sign up and choose your favorite categories, there are daily recommendations based on your preferences and reading history.

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There’s also a place to keep track of what you’re currently reading, what you want to read and what you’ve already read.

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And a yearly reading challenge where you plug in how many books you want to read that year.

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As you can see, I’m eleven books ahead of schedule.

If you love to read? Check it out… it’s free so you’ve got nothing to lose. Except time.

😉

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My Planet… part two.

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A few more laughs from Mary Roach.

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She does make a valid point.

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The previous owners of our house removed three drawers in the kitchen and installed a dishwasher. After 10 years of never opening it, I hired the same contractor to get rid of the dry rotting dishwasher and rebuild the cabinet with a sliding shelf. We’ve been through three refrigerators since we’ve lived here, I don’t need this one developing an attitude.

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I unabashedly raise my hand on this one and admit to telling many a mechanic about the funny noises emanating from under the hood . Lucky for me the vorculator was still in good shape.

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A bright spot in the dark.

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Work continues underground… and in the far reaches of our dark as a crap filled tomb cellar, there is light.

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And a small amount of open space with freshly swept floors, insulated walls and a new white ceiling. There are also shelves…

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Though the construction of said shelves leaves a bit to be desired.

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After seeing this one start to sag, I highly recommended brackets. Whether my suggestion will be implemented or ignored is up for debate.

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Heating ducts have been wrapped with insulation as well….

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Though it looks like things went a little haywire here.

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I have no explanation for this puzzled looking chicken. You’d think it was mine, but oddly enough… it’s not.

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Do mothers even do this anymore?

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Another treasure made its way up from the basement the other day and while I won’t bore you with the ridiculous amount of minutia my mother recorded during my first year of life in this baby book (Aunt Charlotte gifted us a silver spoon, woot!)….. I would like to point out that at age five?

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I was apparently as round as I was tall.

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I have to admit while the information itself didn’t mean much, holding a book filled with my late mother’s handwriting did make me choke up a little.

Do mothers even do this anymore… or is there just an app? Because I gotta say, fifty years from now when a grown up child finds that? No tears will be shed.

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